Today, when putting something away on a high shelf, something small and black fell down my cleavage. I thought nothing of it and finished the task at hand. When I pulled out the neck of my shirt later to find it and looked down, glaring up at me from my boobs was a large, disgruntled spider. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, I stooped to pick up an earring back off the ground. It was actually a spider. FML
Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML
Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML
Today, while at work, I felt what I thought was a ball of lint on the back of my neck. I reached back and grabbed it only to end up holding the biggest wolf spider I've ever seen. FML
Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML
Today, while bringing boxes up from the basement, I noticed a few spider egg sacs had stuck to my shirt. As I desperately tried to remove them, they hatched. FML
Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML
Today, I walked into my boss’s office for a serious meeting. While I was talking, I felt something on my arm, looked down, and realized it was a giant spider crawling up my sleeve. I tried to casually shake it off without screaming, but I just ended up doing a bizarre, silent dance in front of my boss. FML
Today, while typing at my desk, I leaned back in my chair to stretch my arms. A spider dangling from the ceiling must have been watching me since it had perfect timing on its descent right into my open yawning mouth. FML
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Top comments
elgordito_fml 0
lol, this is a awesome mental image
Laxloverr24 0
I hate spiders
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Comments (76)
reecescuphoe 0
if i saw something black fall down my cleavage i would stop what im doing right away and see wat it was..i wouldnt wait but thats just funny lol
chapachristina4 0
24- hey I like your pic lol XD
bubbles94 0
well it looked like something small probably, but when looking at it spider-wise the spider was obviously pretty big. FYL btw. That's horrible. Love the wording though XD
ladiesman14 0
were you sweating ? maybe the spider likes mountain dew.
DameGreyWulf 0
Now I must admit, mountain dew is pretty great. Erotic and romantic. I'll have to remember that. FML's a nice place for some great jokes and such, mmhmm.
Ninjaface 0
The spider was planning on spinning some cobwebs between your breasts because it knows it's been ages since anybody's seen them. You obviously need to get out more, because the only guy that should be crawling all over you is the one you're screwing.
Xynie 20
that makes no ******* sense
picturescrazy 24
First the spider was small and black... then it was huge? And why is this in the intimacy section? o.o Scary yes... intimate... not so much, unless you two got it on later :]
ncvolley123 8
I think OP means that it was small for something else, but large for a spider. example; spiders are small, but can grow to be large compared to other spiders
scintal 0
A picture of that would be great.
Nyxity 0
D:! i would have totally freaked out, "OMG SOMETHING UNKNOWN FELL INTO MY CLEAVAGE OMG GET IT OUT GET IT OFF OMGOMGOMG." I'd probably end up breaking a ton of stuff too XD
smashlee22 0
I would have freaked out and not been able to sleep for a few days
felixfelix 0
SOME BOOBS
miley_baby 0
okay i had to comment due to the fact i read this like 3 house ago and i''ve been walking around doing house work having random busts of the giggles picturing some hott busty chick looking into her shirt to see a angry spider giving a WTF >:( kind of face lmao that was just a cute little image to have in my head.
gijoe011 6
Your comment totally had me rolling way more than the actual FML!