Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and eating a...

By elisimo - 24/01/2012 08:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and eating a burger. Feeling frisky, I sat up and took off my shirt. He looked at my chest, at his burger, then back at me and said, "Give me a minute, I don't want my food to get cold." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 644

You deserved it 35 949

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Same thing different taste

Kinky

By sandwichsex - 08/08/2009 22:39 - United States

Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 211

You deserved it 12 034

By Anonymous - 13/01/2011 21:10 - Lebanon

Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 414

You deserved it 5 006

By oumalina - 12/08/2010 01:54 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I ordered pizza and watched a movie. After dinner we started to make out. I began to take my clothes off when he stopped me. He said that sex is exercise and you can't exercise for 30 minutes after eating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 090

You deserved it 8 430

Hidden secret

By anonymous - 01/10/2016 09:00 - Australia - Tennyson

Today, I was with my boyfriend. He got up, shut the blinds and turned around to say, "I don't usually shut the blinds, but no one can see this." Assuming we were going to have sex, I took my pants off. He asked me what I was doing, then sat down to eat an entire tub of ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 323

You deserved it 2 155

Hangry for that Mickey D's

By anonymous - 23/07/2021 07:59

Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, starting to get intimate with him, when one of his friends walked into the room, grabbed my leg, and pulled me onto the floor. His reason? He was hungry and wanted to go to McDonald's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 622

You deserved it 183

By sarajj - 29/03/2013 21:36 - United States - Littleton

Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 727

You deserved it 9 316

Hangry sex

By Krissy - 06/04/2012 02:11 - United States

Today, during sex, my boyfriend stopped and asked if he could eat a sandwich while we do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 205

You deserved it 4 861

Smooth talker

By Kate - 07/03/2009 18:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were out to eat. The waiter came and asked what we wanted. My boyfriend said he wanted a cheeseburger and I told the waiter I'd have the same. My boyfriend looked at me and said, "Are you sure you don't want a salad?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 789

You deserved it 8 268

By unwantedlove - 25/02/2011 18:36 - France

Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 175

You deserved it 6 923

The art of seduction

By Anonymous - 26/10/2020 19:58

Today, I took a bath and dressed in a skimpy lingerie. I sat on the couch for an hour and a half before giving up and putting on my boyfriend's old t shirt. It was then that he decided to comment. On the t shirt I was wearing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 472

You deserved it 238

Wheredidgrungego 12

Tuesday 24 January 2012 15:51

We're men. We don't waste food.

lolmigosh 15

Tuesday 24 January 2012 15:51

Talk about a yummy burger!

Comments

princessdolly 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 21:57

I want your wie....wie....wiener

esanena21 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 22:06

Lol dayuuuuuummmmm

renesmeebb 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 22:18

Totally woulda waited till he was done eating!

Iceknave 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 22:29

Maybe he needed energy before getting "frisky"

kylewyote13 1

Tuesday 24 January 2012 22:30

Can I get a check on his man card please?

thewife5 19

Tuesday 24 January 2012 22:42

If it was a 5 guys burger I completely understand .. What is it you are mad about? Burgers and bone.. Yum, be patient

aron666 25

Tuesday 24 January 2012 22:45

One can't choose sex with an empty stomach...

Namenlos_fml 20

Tuesday 24 January 2012 22:46

It's true that men's three basic needs are food, sleep and sex, but it's not fair to try to satisfy two at the same time! We get confused. Then we're forced to make a choice. Sometimes you won't like the decision we make.