Miscellaneous: Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get...

By Obi1Shinobi - 30/10/2012 14:27 - United States

Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 157

You deserved it 4 668

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Same thing different taste

By airhead2015 - 12/02/2014 17:57 - United States - Morristown

Today, I ran out of toilet paper. I yelled from the bathroom for my parents to bring me some toilet paper. My dad slipped one tiny piece of toilet paper under the door and boomed, "THE FINAL TEST." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 425

You deserved it 5 689

By Anonymous - 27/08/2011 23:07 - Canada

Today, I took a dump without checking for toilet paper. I then called my step dad, who said "use the stuff in the garbage." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 517

You deserved it 5 647

By CallmeEddie - 14/11/2013 16:44 - United States - Joliet

Today, while I was in a bathroom stall, the guy next to me asked me for toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 912

You deserved it 4 913

Shit for brains

By Anonymous - 31/10/2023 15:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, in desperate need of a shit, I quickly ran into a shop to buy toilet paper. I rushed home and unleashed, only to realise I'd bought paper towels. Without options, I had to wipe my ass with them and consequently blocked the toilet. I found rolls of toilet paper while looking for the plunger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195

You deserved it 688

By lanikai610 - 26/10/2011 18:35 - United States

Today, there was no toilet paper left, so I asked my grandmother if I could use her Kleenex tissues. I found out too late that they were Vicks VapoRub tissues. My crotch has been burning for the last half hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 400

You deserved it 7 619

What happened next?

By Broke boy - 26/06/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I was in a public toilet stall and realized too late that there was no toilet paper left on the roll. I had to awkwardly shuffle around in a panic, knocking on the stall walls to ask for help. The guy in the next stall over gruffly said, “Dude, be a man, just use a sock or something.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 123

By Anonymous - 22/04/2013 18:33 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 943

You deserved it 8 684

By lvegadelgado_6 - 10/08/2015 14:32 - United States - Deerfield

Today, while I was doing my hair, my grandpa walked in, dropped his pants, and started taking a crap in the toilet right next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 572

You deserved it 2 145

Always check before

By Anonymous - 19/05/2017 14:00

Today, the stall I was using didn't have any toilet paper in it. Being the immature idiot I am, I was too embarrassed to ask for someone to grab me some. So I waited 45 minutes for the bathroom to be empty and crept into the next stall, only to find it was also out of toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 711

You deserved it 955

Who wants to be a millionaire?

By Not telling you in a million years - 03/03/2025 03:00 - Canada

Today, I had just sat down and taken a dump in a public restroom when I realized there was no toilet paper. I tried to discreetly call for help, but no one heard me. My only option was to text a friend and have them bring me some. The worst part? My friend ended up texting me, "You called for backup?" as I waited in humiliation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 205

You deserved it 279

Demonfish 14

Tuesday 30 October 2012 18:53

Your grandfather is a legend! Tad cruel though :P

unknown_user5566 26

Tuesday 30 October 2012 18:53

Grandparents: always there to remind us how "spoiled" they think we are.

Comments

jazzykinss 1

Wednesday 31 October 2012 3:05

Woah!

mierz 6

Wednesday 31 October 2012 5:30

Reminds me of the toilet paper shortage of 1957

wolfgirl18 3

Wednesday 31 October 2012 6:41

I'm sorry but this is hilarious FYL tho

esb77 8

Wednesday 31 October 2012 6:45

At least your grandpa has a sense of humor :)

laden_swallow09 34

Wednesday 31 October 2012 7:02

Granpappy's an OG, yo.

iamhe 8

Wednesday 31 October 2012 8:57

Did you smell your hand after?

HunkyFes 6

Wednesday 31 October 2012 16:12

Am I the only one who just looked up the history of toilet paper?

desertlovebird 11

Wednesday 31 October 2012 17:01

Wish I could do that to my kids but I always keep tp in the in the bathroom. Way to go Grampa

noisebox 1

Wednesday 31 October 2012 18:50

He is the undiscovered Susan Boyle of comedy...

SpearD 4

Thursday 1 November 2012 0:37

When that happens to me, I usually have my phone with me so I can text someone

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The Top

Today, my husband is so bored with speaking to me, he literally walked outside when I was mid-sentence during a conversation about how I need more attention in our relationship. We've only been married 3 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 960

You deserved it 402

Today, when my boyfriend came over he was on his phone. We spent about 15 minutes together before having sex, then he made a phone call and said he had to leave. I could hear him from my window apologising to his coworker because he “just had to do something real quick but was now free to talk again.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 468

You deserved it 171

Today, I was going to end a thing I had with this guy. It turned out that he got back together with his ex-girlfriend and was just using me as a back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 109

You deserved it 4 113

Today, I removed all my online dating profiles. Apparently my ex-husband finds stalking me online preferable to spending time with his new girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 074

You deserved it 3 013

Today, I told my husband that I was going to get a swimsuit from the Victoria's Secret catalog. He replied, "Are you going to get the body to go with it?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 722

You deserved it 10 434

Today, I realized that I got set up by my narcissistic ex-fiancée. She'd planned to get pregnant by me, did, then halfway way through the pregnancy put a restraining order on me, and went MIA. Now I don't know anything about my child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 470

You deserved it 148