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After reading "Today, I was jerking off in the train washroom" was more than enough information to vote YDI. Who the hell wanks on a train? Teach your monkey some manners and tell it you'll spank it when you have privacy.
"Today, I was jerking off in a train washroom", instant YDI. Have some self control and wait until you get home.
Keywords
"I get off by jerking off in public bathrooms, FML."
Why would you jack off on a train you ******* weirdo?? That's disgusting, blue balls or not.