This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By his pants would be on fire - 28/05/2017 18:00

Today, I was going into work early, only to find my car was gone. I checked to see if I parked elsewhere and was about to dial 911 when I saw my roommate pull my car back into its normal spot. He completely denied everything, even after I showed him a video I took of him getting out of my car. FML
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Top comments

damo123 13

I'll be kicking him out of the house

49 0
RichardPencil 30

You may have so-called evidence, but he has "alternative facts" going for him. At this point in history, we just have to go with the more popular reality* *As determined by the Electoral College.

42 9

Comments

damo123 13

I'll be kicking him out of the house

49 0
Pixiewolfe 46

Yes, play dumb. That will work with video evidence!

21 0
RichardPencil 30

You may have so-called evidence, but he has "alternative facts" going for him. At this point in history, we just have to go with the more popular reality* *As determined by the Electoral College.

42 9
TheJokerDK 7

You do realize the electoral college was put in place to protect the votes of those of us who don't live in major cities other wise literally 12 cities would determine all the presidential elections

6 0
RichardPencil 30

No, it was put into place to disenfranchise voters in reliably blue or red states like California, Texas and New York, and give disproportionate influence to toss-up states like Ohio and Florida. It also gives perversions like Trump and W Bush the power to rule contrary to the will of the people.

5 2
Matt Kesler 16

cry me a ******* river, it's the way the process works. Don't like? there's a lot of the rest of the world to live in.

3 3
Colon_Man 17

"You're sleeping with my girlfriend!" "No, I'm not." "You're still humping!"

15 1
CrazyTrainWreck 19

Apparently his Jedi mind trick failed to work on you.

8 1
mitolit 12

"Just say it wasn't you" -Shaggy

8 1
Death69 24

Is your roommate Donald Trump? If so, impeach the bastard and throw him out!

3 1
bogolopian 12

I had the same happen to me with a boarder but not seeing her doing it. Just felt that my car was being moved and less fuel in it. Although annoyed that someone used my car and suspecting the roommate,I had no evidence at the time.. It escalated to all my stuff being stolen. Again the denial. Then cheques were put through my account. On gut instinct, I kicked her out. she badmouthed to everyone how mean I was for kicking her out on the streets...Later the police provided me with surveillance video of her and friends stealing my stuff...Turned out she was a drug user........ Be very wary.

8 0
CassyM 6

911 should not be used for a stolen car. It is for life and death situaltions, as Jobekka was trying to say. Phone an non emergency police station line.

4 0
WhiteNoise77 5

That is actually pretty serious. Your room mate has stated loud and clear that they lie for everything no matter what. Those people are poison in your life. Get them out or yourself away ASAP.

8 0