Love: Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my...

By Anonymous - 29/10/2012 05:46 - United States

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 137

You deserved it 28 817

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Same thing different taste

By ouch - 16/06/2016 10:14 - United States - Livonia

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was so angry, she stabbed me in the hand with a plastic fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 399

You deserved it 2 021

By ddll - 05/09/2011 01:27 - Singapore

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 338

You deserved it 12 336

By tumbleshay - 21/03/2015 01:32 - United States - Veneta

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend because I felt unappreciated. She found it appropriate to sarcastically say, "Oh no, how will I ever be able to open my jars?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 194

You deserved it 4 882

By Nico711 - 30/03/2019 02:00

Today, my girlfriend and I were out to dinner. She had to use the bathroom, so she went, but the food came while she was in there. She came out, yelling at me for ordering the food to come that exact time, then she broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 488

You deserved it 215

By Anonymous - 29/11/2010 19:09

Today, my girlfriend threw my X-box out the window, because I asked her how much she weighs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 301

You deserved it 56 461

By Anonymous - 19/06/2011 05:01 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by putting a Post-it note on my locker that said, "Consider yourself dumped." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 843

You deserved it 4 686

By snowman - 06/02/2010 05:12 - United States

Today, right before a huge snowstorm hit our area, I broke up with my girlfriend. In her fury, she decided to grab my car keys and roll down all four windows in my car. I now have 2 feet of half melted snow in my backseat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 025

You deserved it 11 837

By Anonymous - 01/09/2011 10:14 - China

Today, I was in a restaurant with my fiancée for dinner. I commented that she had some food around her mouth. She responded with a lecture, then by throwing her hot bowl of noodles at me, before stomping out the restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 835

You deserved it 4 363

By f03_f0r_l1f3 - 26/06/2009 05:31 - United States

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. Driving her home, we got stuck in a construction zone. I waited half an hour with with my ex-girlfriend bawling her eyes out in the passenger seat as I watched the traffic lady eat her lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 180

You deserved it 65 756

By NowImSingle - 12/02/2018 19:00

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and threw all my stuff out into the yard because she caught me "texting another woman". Guess it didn't matter to her that the contact name was "Mom". FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 556

You deserved it 421

WearingHats 14

Monday 29 October 2012 16:01

At least it was empty.

ginnygoggorgon 3

Monday 29 October 2012 16:02

Reconsider your word choices when breaking up with future girlfriends lol

Comments

khildebrand2294 9

Monday 29 October 2012 17:01

Tht sucks bro!! Tho no offense, the irony of tht is hilarious.

Fatmangotmypie1 7

Monday 29 October 2012 17:02

Well that's just...... Smashing

khildebrand2294 9

Monday 29 October 2012 17:08

Ah ha! I see what u did there!

Cainicide 5

Monday 29 October 2012 17:05

"I agree, you do have a lot on your plate..." "YOUR BLOOD!"

shysassychic 1

Monday 29 October 2012 17:23

Oh my god. That's the funniest thing I've heard all day. You really deserved that though watch your similes next time... I'm dying of laughter. 1 point for the ex

StalkerChick 13

Monday 29 October 2012 17:31

you should've hit her with the bus driver uppercut.

unknown_user5566 26

Monday 29 October 2012 17:35

I can't really blame her. Next time you decide to break up with someone, you should probably give a better reason than "I've got a lot on my plate". Those cliche break-up lines never turn out well.