Intimacy: Today, at work I went to the bathroom to pooh, and I heard another... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Anonymous - 29/06/2016 19:12 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, at work I went to the bathroom to pooh, and I heard another woman in one of the stalls grunting horribly. To ease the tension I joked "Sounds bad. Having a baby?" My boss said back "I'm constipated. I could use some help." Yup; today my job depended on helping my boss take a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 260

You deserved it 33

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

Sudoc 29

Thursday 30 June 2016 11:28

I'm probably going to regret this, but how exactly were you supposed to "help"?

Oh_No_Not_Him 25

Thursday 30 June 2016 11:37

I really hope you get hazard-pay for that one!

Comments

Sudoc 29

Thursday 30 June 2016 11:28

I'm probably going to regret this, but how exactly were you supposed to "help"?

countryb_cth 38

Thursday 30 June 2016 13:02

I was going to ask the same thing. Kind of scared for the answer though.

Oh_No_Not_Him 25

Thursday 30 June 2016 11:37

I really hope you get hazard-pay for that one!

Elgrin 15

Friday 1 July 2016 16:23

It could be worse. I'm struggling to see how, though.

GhostFox 33

Tuesday 5 July 2016 8:44

The boss could have been having an actual baby and OP could have had to help with that?

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Parenting Poopoo peepee Kids Family Cheating Love NSFW Fight Awkward Sex Intimacy Lonely Shopping AITA Work Make up Money Miscellaneous Dreams Medication Liar Weird Embarrassing Weddings Anniversary Health Confused Healthy Lifestyle Neighbours Noise

The Top

The Top

Today, I worked my first day at a nursery. At nap time I spent about an hour trying to get all the kids to calm down and go to sleep. I'd finally got the last one to drop off, when my phone rang. Loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 704

You deserved it 41 117

Today, I was having computer problems, so I let my friend have remote access to fix them. We were video-chatting on Skype at the time, and so he thought it'd be hilarious to load hardcore porn in my browser the moment he saw my mom enter the room from behind me. I'm now grounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 572

You deserved it 3 429

Today, my three year old sister asked me to go to the amusement park with her. Since I was late for work, I politely refused and said we'd go tomorrow. She punched me in the nuts so hard that I could barely walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 132

You deserved it 5 487

Today, my future mother-in-law started shit-talking me on Facebook, and we got into a heated argument. She called me later in the day, saying I'll be lucky if I ever marry her son and that, "You'll suffer to your last breath." I'm now terrified to set foot outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 257

You deserved it 6 043

Today, I went to the vending machine, put in a dollar, and reached down to grab my snack. The slot door wouldn't open, so I pushed it harder. I got my hand in, but the door got stuck again, this time with my hand inside. I tried to push with my other hand. It got stuck too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 839

You deserved it 9 849

Today, I was in a Zoom meeting. I usually have tape over my camera and pretend it's busted so I don't have to perform like a circus monkey, but I forgot that I'd removed it to chat with my cousin last night. I was halfway through eating a mango when my boss paused mid-speech and said, “Is now really the best time for that?” The meeting went silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 163

You deserved it 719