Love and Drunk: Thanks, I guess…

Thanks, I guess…

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, my boyfriend came home drunk from town, busted the toilet door open crying, and proposed to me with a ring and all. I was literally mid-shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 609

You deserved it 362

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Same thing different taste

By ShittyProposal - 20/10/2013 07:06 - United States - Columbus

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 280

You deserved it 4 875

By Anonymous - 12/03/2013 22:21 - United States - Berkeley

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. I said yes. This caused him to panic, excuse himself, then take it back via text message a half hour later, claiming he'd been drunk. We live together. When he comes back home, it's going to be very awkward indeed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 599

You deserved it 3 116

Nervous

By amelie - 09/12/2018 05:00

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. While getting down on one knee, he farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 745

You deserved it 721

By cai - 29/10/2011 08:56 - United States

Today, my boyfriend finally proposed to me. He was drunk and won't remember any of this tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 654

You deserved it 3 859

By em - 05/02/2011 09:32 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend came home drunk. As he got home he asked me to marry him, I was going to say yes until he said, "Oh wait, wrong woman." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 316

You deserved it 5 918

By Anonymous - 10/05/2014 22:11 - Sweden - Lidk?ping

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by coming home early. He walked in on me sitting on the toilet, singing full volume to my cat as I took a crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 402

You deserved it 13 713

Party animal

By Laci - 30/04/2011 17:50 - United States

Today, I was stuck crouching over the toilet after a night of drinking. My fiancé walked in, gathered my hair, and held it out of the way. When another wave of nausea hit me and I leaned in, he shoved my face into the bowl and ran out, laughing and yelling, "That'll teach ya!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 957

You deserved it 23 233

By gp28 - 18/02/2010 20:08 - United States

Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 950

You deserved it 4 016

By lillymean - 03/02/2012 01:02 - United Kingdom

Today, I reached a new low in my relationship: my boyfriend got so drunk I had to help him take a piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 492

You deserved it 6 116

HELP!

By SeatofIgnorance - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 766

You deserved it 5 472

acmariner99 25

Friday 2 November 2018 3:32

Well ... what did you say?

Dave_Davington 33

Friday 2 November 2018 3:54

Some things absolutely cannot wait, and this situation involves two such things.

Comments

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Friday 2 November 2018 17:13

Talk about a shitty propoosal. I'll see myself out.

BurnInDemonFire 35

Friday 2 November 2018 18:28

Please do. Immediately.

BloodyButUnbowed 32

Friday 2 November 2018 18:18

Well, on the bright side, you will easily win any "worst proposal" contest you ever find yourself in.

sunshineandroses 9

Friday 2 November 2018 22:29

did he remember it when he sobered up?

magnumpeyote66 6

Saturday 3 November 2018 15:39

We all must know Did you say yes?

1gullible_bugger 34

Tuesday 6 November 2018 8:27

you could look at it as a compliment. He's comfortable enough with you to walk right into the bathroom. Haha

juggalo2 21

Saturday 17 January 2026 14:39

Good thing you were sitting down. (Hat tip to Roseanne)

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was picking up my 10 year old step-son from the airport. He began screaming and crying saying that I wasn't his father. I ended up sitting in a holding room because the security guards thought I was kidnapping him. My wife thought it was hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 109

You deserved it 3 420

Today, I wanted to show my teenage daughter what we did when I was her age. We used to breakdance, so I stuck on a Grandmaster Flash track, and tried some old moves on the living room floor. I spun out of control, smacked my head into a wall and pulled a back muscle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 345

You deserved it 41 216

Today, my wife of seven years told me that she doesn't trust me with dog-sitting her dog while she leaves to spend Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's with her family. She ended up calling someone she "trusts" to take care of her dog while I spend the holidays by myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 493

You deserved it 4 593

Today, my sister caught me bent over trying to trim my pubic hairs. She took a photo of my spread ass as a joke and scared me so bad, I cut my clitoris. Currently in hospital hopped up on the really good morphine for the excruciating pain. Oh, and the stitches, God, I can't forget the stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 589

You deserved it 452

Today, after attending lectures for months, studying for weeks, and spending hours writing a 15-page research paper, I was informed that due to technological issues during registration, I was not enrolled in the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 007

You deserved it 1 252

Today, during an argument, my boyfriend had the nerve to tell me he'll make more than me at his new job that he starts next week. He can't keep a job for more than six months. I've been working at my job for over two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 361

You deserved it 105