Animals: How dare you - FML

How dare you

By pissed off - 01/07/2012 01:00

Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 519

You deserved it 2 635

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Same thing different taste

By litterbox_girl - 19/08/2009 01:13 - United States

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house while his plumbing was being redone. I really had to pee, but the toilet wasn't working, so I peed in his cat's litterbox. His cat got defensive, and started attacking me while I peed. My boyfriend walked in and saw the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 817

You deserved it 71 172

Toot toot

By I…… - 10/08/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, I was relaxing on the sofa with the cat purring on my lap. My husband blasted an air horn. I'm now covered in cat scratches and piss, from both myself and the cat. I'm going to skin him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 431

You deserved it 91

By Js2cool - 29/09/2015 02:32 - United States - Fitchburg

Today, I went to clean my cat's litter box, not realizing she was in it. As I lifted the top half of the litter box up, she sprayed me with piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 097

You deserved it 7 127

A Caturday surprise

By fucking cat - 02/03/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, I shut the door to the bedroom so my wife and I could have a serious talk. Unfortunately, the cat stuck his paw under the door and started flailing around, causing me to bust up laughing at a bad moment. My wife was furious, threw a water bottle at me, and locked me out overnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 471

You deserved it 240

By time to buy a gun - 02/11/2015 04:22 - United States - Carolina

Today, I was upstairs with my wife when I heard my cat scream from the porch downstairs. I ran down to find her "puffed up" and growling on the floor, and a corner of the screen next to the door busted out. I still have no idea what caused it and my wife is now afraid to go to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 043

You deserved it 1 702

Poor little guy

By CatLady - 09/06/2011 07:20 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I tried to give his cat medicine. Unfortunately, it reacted in a way it never had before: clawed his arms to bits, bit him so hard a tooth fell out, peed everywhere, including on me, and pooped on the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 350

You deserved it 6 051

Not now!

By Adam - 16/03/2010 20:51 - United States

Today, I woke up to go pee and my cat followed me into the bathroom as usual. Then, in a not so usual fashion, she tried to jump from the sink to the top of the toilet, missed, and fell into the bowl while I was peeing. I'm scratched in a bad place, I have urine to clean up off the bathroom floor, and a traumatized cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 353

You deserved it 5 190

By Anonymous - 04/05/2009 12:37 - Canada

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me because he loves toilets. Everyone was sleeping so I went pee but didnt flush. My cat jumped onto the seat and fell in. I had to lift him out and then wash him. He hates water though, so I was scratched by my cat who was dripping with my own pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 024

You deserved it 28 872

Party animal

By Anonymous - 16/09/2020 02:04

Today, my husband woke up, tried walking to the bathroom, fell down, got back up and started peeing on the carpet. I’ve never seen him this drunk before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 299

You deserved it 200

Welcome back!

By Sorry... - 09/11/2025 20:00

Today, my husband was coming back after three weeks away for work. I was ready to surprise him when he walked in, but the cat took a foul shit in the litter box and the smell stressed me out so much that the first thing he heard was, "Clean the cat box!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 77

You deserved it 531

Next

Top comments

xxkimmyt 9

Sunday 1 July 2012 10:12

Maybe that is why I woke up.

krysxkatastrophe 14

Sunday 1 July 2012 10:14

That's actually really funny. At least he peed in the litter box instead of the floor.

Comments

gionatorinc 5

Monday 2 July 2012 7:07

Oh thats what that noise was. Thanks for clearing that up..

bookbee 2

Monday 2 July 2012 7:39

That was you guys?

TinyGiant 4

Monday 2 July 2012 8:47

F your life? Your junk wasn't the subject of a feline attack

purplemnm 9

Monday 2 July 2012 9:08

Hey, keep it down over there! I'm trying to sleep!

lolnatalyloves 9

Monday 2 July 2012 11:29

He deserves it.

amak1228 3

Tuesday 3 July 2012 9:44

So that's what I heard! The world makes sense once again.

wobeert 7

Wednesday 4 July 2012 5:38

i knew i felt a disturbance in the force...

MiSsNiKiTa 4

Sunday 8 July 2012 6:43

One word....Awesome

heathermarie5 0

Friday 13 July 2012 22:17

I didn't hear it.

justdanceforever 20

Monday 9 February 2015 6:29

That's why I randomly woke up that night. Thanks for clearing that up for me.

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