Love, Health and Gross: Ewwwwwww

Ewwwwwww

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 386

You deserved it 4 972

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 950

You deserved it 6 681

By davincourt - 29/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Apollo Beach

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 302

You deserved it 3 010

By sneezer - 30/12/2008 04:54 - France

Today, while kissing my girlfriend's neck, I sneezed a blob of snot onto her. She told me that "it doesn't matter", while hiccuping a bit of vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 183

You deserved it 7 042

By shitfaced - 18/09/2015 17:30 - Netherlands - Sassenheim

Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 709

You deserved it 9 541

My love language is…

By BlueBirdWings - 31/05/2019 02:30

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 507

You deserved it 324

The Taste of Love

By Anonymous - 05/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 502

You deserved it 323

Seduction technique

By BlueBirdWings - 06/03/2012 07:20 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 801

You deserved it 6 811

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 809

You deserved it 299

By Anonymous - 18/02/2013 19:11 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 102

You deserved it 40 070

Say it, don't spray it

By grossedout - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was helping an old lady at my job. While I was in mid-sentence, she coughed wet phlegm directly into my mouth. It tasted vile and caused me to have a panic attack while working. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 423

You deserved it 3 130

redbluegreen 40

Friday 18 February 2011 11:50

As if it needed to be said, her actions were snot for the greater good.

Doortje 29

Friday 18 February 2011 12:08

Oh my.. *shudders* *shudders again* Brr. Yuck.

Comments

locachick101 0

Friday 18 February 2011 12:10

eww! thats really disgusting and nasty.. you shoulda stop her or something

seraphxchild 3

Friday 18 February 2011 12:12

oh my god EW EW EW EW WHO THE HELL DOES THAT?!

erongetti 2

Saturday 19 February 2011 13:36

ditto!!!

yesiyes 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 18:12

your mum

Kelita 0

Friday 18 February 2011 12:17

eeeeeeeewwwwwwww that's just wrong. Well that taste wouldn't b in ur mouth if u would have pushed her off. Once again....eeeeeeeewwwwwwww!!!!!

lekiat 0

Friday 18 February 2011 12:21

TMI...FYL

Jimboom 11

Friday 18 February 2011 12:22

*Dons Matrix style black coat and Morpheus's sunglasses* Are you sure that's phlegm you're chewing?

jemmawainwright 0

Friday 18 February 2011 12:25

poor guy!!

melibear89 7

Friday 18 February 2011 12:26

that's disgusting. what kind of person does that.

survivorSos 0

Friday 18 February 2011 12:34

was it good test ???????? loooool !!!!

hghiPigh 0

Friday 18 February 2011 12:38

was it salty?

whiterabbit420 4

Friday 18 February 2011 13:26

lol

yesiyes 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 18:13

just a bit

rattusrattus 18

Friday 18 February 2011 12:43

Oh eww. Just... ew. Ew. Ew ew ew. Gross. Eww. Wait... why didn't you push her away? Summary: ew.

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