Dog Jump Fail By FML Approved - 18/10/2017 15:10 - United States - New York Practice doesn't always make perfect! I agree, your life sucks 431 You deserved it 109 Share Tweet Share
Today, I went to Victoria's Secret to buy a bra. A woman sized me and then gave me a bra to try on in the fitting room. To my pleasure, it seemed to fit well. The woman who had sized me came in to check on me and replied, "Yeah, it happens. Not everyone can be symmetrical." FML I agree, your life sucks 29 994 You deserved it 2 751
Today, while talking to my close female friend whose roommate I have a crush on, I learned that my crush shaves her bikini area into a heart shape. I also learned that my crush is apparently also asexual, so I have no chance with her. FML I agree, your life sucks 894 You deserved it 311
Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML I agree, your life sucks 42 942 You deserved it 11 248
Today, my dad yelled at me for using legal marijuana to help treat my potentially terminal cancer, which is kind of hypocritical for the man who spent significant portions of my childhood in jail for selling cocaine to rich high school kids. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 234 You deserved it 96
Today, I finally built up the courage to seek professional help for my eating disorder. Apparently I don't meet the criteria, so I was denied help and got sent away. So basically, I'll have to get even sicker for them to take me seriously. FML I agree, your life sucks 998 You deserved it 87
Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML I agree, your life sucks 63 305 You deserved it 17 481
Today, my boyfriend went down on me. I don't know why, but my mind wandered. He now thinks that he has the skills of a porn star, while I'm pretty sure that finally solving a mathematical problem I've been working on for a week caused me to orgasm. FML I agree, your life sucks 55 084 You deserved it 9 049
Today, my drunk mother got into a fight with the lady at Krystal burger. Why? "Because the bitch said they aren't making special orders." FML I agree, your life sucks 24 923 You deserved it 2 598