Vacation

You fool

By Anonymous - 25/10/2024 12:00 - Germany - Hamburg

Today, my wife and I both spent a weekend away separately with our close friends. However, we ran into each other, unplanned, at the airport. She was with her girls and I was with my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61

You deserved it 1 769

Controlling

By Anonymous - 01/07/2023 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, even though I was very clear before I went on holiday that I was going completely zero contact to de-stress, my mother rang at least twice a day. When I stopped answering the phone, she found the direct number of the local police station in a foreign country and sent them to find me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 983

You deserved it 115

By Anonymous - 20/06/2019 12:41

Today, just a day prior to my vacation starting, I learned that my five-day "seasonal fever" is actually due to a blood infection from a bacteria. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 782

You deserved it 122

Happy anniversary!

By Anonymous - 20/06/2023 17:00 - United Kingdom - Nottingham

Today, our anniversary, is a disaster. The restaurant gave away our table, even though we were early, and the hotel we’d booked for three nights had a burst pipe, so we had to sleep in the only other hotel, which was so seedy the deskman openly assumed we were two cheaters meeting for a quick fuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 042

You deserved it 133

I'm not a monster, I'm a human being

By Casey - 18/03/2021 11:01

Today, on vacation my wife asked if I wanted her to take my picture. I realized it was the first time in our 10 years she had asked me that question. Moments later I realized it's the first time in my life that anyone's ever asked me that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 991

You deserved it 120

The neverending story

By Anonymous - 17/07/2022 10:00

Today, I tested positive for COVID-19. I just spent 5 weeks at a job training and was supposed to go on holiday on Monday, the first since 2019. Now I can’t even go home and hug my son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 886

You deserved it 190

Calories for days

By Anonymous - 31/07/2023 18:00

Today, I've been trying to make the most out of my short vacation by dieting, by eating a big pot of yogurt with lots of fresh fruit every day. Turns out what I thought was yogurt is actually heavy cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202

You deserved it 1 072

Management for dummies

By hayley8 - 04/06/2022 10:00

Today, it’s the middle of my vacation and I just got a notification saying my time off request was denied. A month earlier, I got the notice saying it was approved. I’m literally 4 states over. I’m not going to have a job when I get back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 217

You deserved it 99

Preparation is key

By powerspin_fml - 27/07/2023 18:02 - Canada

Today, both my boss and my wife's boss gave us the day off. Do we go biking with the children? Do we go on a picnic with the children? No, I'm not allowed doing anything until she and I find a world-class, free activity to do. This is gonna be our day off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 698

You deserved it 173

Haunted

By Anonymous - 16/07/2022 02:00 - Austria - Roitham

Today, I arrived at the airport with time to spare, only to realize in the middle of security checks that I'd left my phone in the Uber that got me there. I suffer from anxiety and depression, and despite getting my phone back in time to board, I can't enjoy my trip because I'm obsessing over this trivial mistake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 001

You deserved it 538

Travel man

By Anonymous - 01/06/2022 18:00

Today, I attempted to go on holiday but when my passport was scanned it triggered an alarm. Apparently I’m a wanted man for several crimes in Majorca. I’ve never once set foot in Majorca. You’d think my passport information would tell them that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 146

You deserved it 112

Family vacation!

By Ungrateful brat - 06/06/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, at the beach, my son was screaming and crying because the sand was burning his feet. I told him to put on his sandals. He got mad and threw them in the ocean, then started crying harder when he realized they were gone. He's now hiding under the bed in the condo and is refusing to come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 465

You deserved it 215

Strange system

By Anonymous - 29/05/2025 09:00 - Sweden - Gothenburg

Today, I was expecting a big sum of money for skipping last year's vacation while working as a freelancer, as I've done the last four years. Turns out I won't get the money, as last month I accepted a full time employment, and now that money has been turned into vacation days instead. Guess I won't buy a new home yet… FML

I agree, your life sucks 355

You deserved it 138

Fun vacation times

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I needed to relax, so I ordered room service at my hotel. When I was finished, I went to put the tray outside, not thinking about needing a key to get back in. I locked myself out of my room, wearing smiley face underwear in a $250 a night hotel. I had to go to the lobby to get a new key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 475

You deserved it 27 390

Cheap-ass lying bro-bro!

By Anonymous - 10/03/2020 04:07 - Netherlands - Bergeyk

Today, I found out my boyfriend is booking my dream vacation to Bali with his brothers, 6 months after he told me we couldn't go on vacation this year because he doesn’t have the money. They planned this within a week. I had been planning it with him for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 326

You deserved it 215

Ball and chain

By Anonymous - 10/09/2021 20:01

Today, my parents tricked me by claiming we were going on holiday, but stopped at grandma"s first, "just to say hi", then left me there with my bags. They dumped me with grandma and went on holiday without me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 365

You deserved it 169

Petrol head

By Anonymous - 06/04/2023 06:00 - Australia

Today, while on a road trip with my friends, we stopped at a gas station to fill up. While I was pumping gas, a gust of wind blew my hat off and it landed in a puddle of gasoline. When I picked it up, my hands were covered in gasoline, so I smelled like a gas station for the rest of the trip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 630

You deserved it 226

Dodgy

By Anonymous - 13/02/2022 14:00

Today, I got a letter from a hostel I stayed at saying they were going to sue me for leaving them a negative Google review. I was the victim of a $7000 theft crime there. They refused to call the police and ambulance when it happened, and they didn’t even give me my money I paid to stay there back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 448

You deserved it 130

What are you doing?

By BitchWhat - 02/09/2025 12:00 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, we're on a group family vacation with our old roommates from college. In the ten years in between, I forgot how much I hate their lazy asses already. I'm doing more than usual on this vacation, I cook, clean, and take care of their kids, only for one to ask, "What were you doing for so long?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 152

Jamaica? I hardly know her

By Anonymous - 07/10/2015 10:58 - United States - Poughkeepsie

Today, my mom and I went to catch our flight to Jamaica. She ended up being detained and questioned, because she packed hairspray, shampoo, drinks, basically half the shit you're not allowed to have in your luggage. We missed our flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 366

You deserved it 2 473

Crop me out

By Anonymous - 11/08/2023 10:00

Today, after wasting $60 and 3 hours of my time getting my hair dyed to get rid of the ugly orange tint it had from the last time I got my hair dyed, it turned out to be the exact same color I started with. I go on vacation in 6 days and hate my hair. I'm not looking forward to taking pictures, that’s for sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 221

You deserved it 674

Fancy seeing you here

By Anonymous - 26/06/2022 04:00

Today, I finally made it to my hotel in Florida, only to discover my boss was holidaying in the same hotel with her wife. So far I’ve run into them three times, at the pool, in the bar, and in the gym, and every time she ends up asking me work related questions. It's like I never left the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 291

You deserved it 109

The Hobble

By Anonymous - 05/05/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, three days into my vacation, I ended up spraining not one, but BOTH of my ankles. Now my entire vacation will be spent healing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 506

You deserved it 91

Watergate II: Pig in the City

By Anonymous - 06/06/2025 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I learned my hotel room had the shittiest blinds ever and that if you want true privacy you need to shut the curtains. I discovered this after three wives from the opposite windows complained I’d been flashing their husbands when I got out of the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 425

You deserved it 131

CBD FML

By Anonymous - 15/03/2022 16:00

Today, I'm planning a long awaited trip to Australia to see family I haven't seen since before the pandemic. I use CBD for pain, and everything I've read contradicts itself. I have no idea if I can take it with me, buy it there, or have to get a prescription or whatever. I guess I'm going to be in pain the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 879

You deserved it 198

Ringing those bells

By Anonymous - 24/08/2022 04:00

Today, I was at the water slide with my two sisters. As we got to the top, my sister wanted me to go first. As soon as I went to go down the slide, she lamped me right in the balls from behind, and pushed me down the slide. My other sister kneed me in the same spot 5 minutes later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 007

You deserved it 153

Touching grass

By 11 months of waiting, and now THIS!? - 05/12/2024 16:00 - Philippines - Imus

Today, it's only day three of my annual vacation. Rest and relaxation? Afraid not! For the past days, I've been haunted by the constant thought of how much work will be piled up when I get back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 421

You deserved it 154

Good vacation?

By Yudith - 29/07/2023 04:00 - Canada - London

Today, I returned to work after two weeks of vacation without a working phone. While I was gone, a beloved former colleague died, two Court hearings got postponed because nobody could find the proof the documents were sent to the other party, and half the office went on vacation. Oh yeah, and my grandma died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 817

You deserved it 156

A lot to deal with

By Anonymous - 21/09/2025 00:00

Today, my boyfriend of six years asked, "If you'd go somewhere, where'd you go?" Assumed he's planning our first big vacation, I said, "Somewhere warm, with water and beaches." Later I found out via social media that he's at the airport with a chick resembling our new neighbour. They're going to a romantic place with his boss. I also found out that I'm pregnant and unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 480

You deserved it 140

Trip of a lifetime

By Just got friendzoned - 24/06/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, on a vacation with my best friend who I’m secretly in love with, I was dressed to the nines, and felt confident and upbeat about myself. Not once has he made a move on me the entire time, not even in the hotel room we both shared. At the end of the trip he told me I’m “such a great friend.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 140

You deserved it 699

FML on Facebook

Keywords

#FAFO Sexism Kids Parents Money Disney Health Poopoo peepee Farts Gross Cheating Miscellaneous Shopping Weird Holidays Vacation Paranoia Love Awkward Moving home Sports Sex Intimacy Work Transportation Cars Annoying Garden Cooking Teachers

The Top

Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. because my throat was swelling up. I called 911 and they determined that I would live, so I took two Benadryl and slept all day. Then I went to urgent care for my scheduled appointment time and tested positive for Covid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 882

You deserved it 223

Today, I had to take an emergency contraceptive. I was talking to my boyfriend about it, and I told him that my stomach really hurt. His response? "Aw. That's just the baby dying." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 332

You deserved it 20 969

Today, nothing changed. Today was the same, and I feel like I'm in a dark comedy version of the movie Groundhog Day meets The Truman Show. I hate dark comedies. I want my life to be canceled… I mean, this movie to be canceled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 626

You deserved it 236

Today, after my boyfriend dumped me, my job cut my hours, and my toddler got an ear infection, all I wanted was a takeaway after I finally got her to sleep. I fell asleep too and never heard the doorbell, so they left my food by the door where rats got at it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 272

You deserved it 194

Today, I came home to find my husband’s disgusting pig of a sister let herself in while we were at work and decided to take a nap in our bed. Not only did she not ask to visit, she left a huge smelly period stain on my favorite sheets. No apology, no attempt to clean up. I didn’t give her a key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 801

You deserved it 98

Today, I have now reached the point in the financial landslide of my life that the only thing of value I have managed to hold on to is my life insurance policy, which I just manage to pay for every month. It says something that I am now actually worth more dead than alive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 100