Stalker

Stalker vibes

By Anonymous - 02/10/2020 20:02 - United States - Fredericksburg

Today, I had a surprise visitor at my place. A guy I was talking to a few months back. He said he was down my way getting gas and thought he’d stop by. He lives more than 45 minutes from my place, in the opposite direction, with about 20 gas stations between us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 308

You deserved it 217

Mortifying

By Creeper - 20/02/2024 16:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I accidentally liked my ex's new partner's photo while stalking them on social media. Now I have to decide between pretending it never happened if they happened to notice, or sending a fruit basket with a note that says, "Sorry for the accidental like. It's not you; it's muscle memory." FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 713

Seek help

By Anonymous - 26/09/2022 12:00

Today, my girlfriend chose to hate-stalk her ex-best friend's social media, then angrily rant to me for over an hour about what she saw. This happens three or four times a week. They last spoke over a decade ago. The last time I suggested therapy, she didn't speak to me for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 090

You deserved it 252

Stalked

By Anonymous - 14/03/2023 06:00 - United States - New York

Today, I'm currently being stalked/harassed by my narcissistic ex's new baby mama. She's trying to get me fired from my new job for taking her man, when in reality I want nothing to do with him. The fact that she has taken my baby's name and named their daughter it, is freaking me out. She has people find me everywhere I go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 157

Snoopy

By No way - 16/07/2025 00:00 - United Kingdom - Bradford

Today, I liked one of my crush’s Instagram post from 2012 while stalking his profile. Despite me realising my mistake and un-liking the post, he immediately followed me back, and sent me a DM saying, “Wow, that’s some deep digging.” I’m now referred to as his "creepy stalker archaeologist of Instagram." FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 565

Just his type

By idekwtfigo - 23/03/2022 14:00

Today, I stalked my boyfriend's ex again. I have come to the realization that I look just like her. I’m that girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 237

You deserved it 1 031

Creeped out

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Coraopolis

Today, the boy who sits next to me in class accidentally dropped his sketch pad. It turns out he's really talented at drawing portraits. They're so good that I could recognize myself in all of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 877

You deserved it 7 876

Stalker vibes

By porkieworkie - 21/04/2009 12:44 - United States

Today, after getting off the phone with a girl I'm interested in, I parked on campus and ate my lunch in the car. As I was sitting there, she appeared out of nowhere and walked to her car. I was parked directly behind her car, sitting there like a creepy ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 771

You deserved it 9 292

Somebody's watching

By KANE LIVES - 06/06/2026 22:00 - Switzerland - Zurich

Today, my son told me he liked a girl, so I asked if they were friends. He said no, he's never spoken to her, but he watches her in class and follows her around. When I told him that was fucking creepy, my wife yelled at me. My kid is a stalker and my wife thinks it's cute. God help me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 452

You deserved it 69

Tracking

By Anonymous - 11/07/2023 18:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I discovered a tracking app enabled on my phone so I switched it off to save battery space. Within 20 minutes my mother rang and demanded to know where I was, what I was doing, if I was with some woman… you get the picture. I'm 32 and own my own apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 129

You deserved it 126

Long time coming

By That was twelve years ago - 23/02/2025 09:00 - United States - Edison

Today, the girl I stalked in high school found me. I've since gotten therapy and fixed my attachment issues, but she told my fiancée the whole story anyway. Now I'm single and sleeping on my clothes in the back of a U-haul. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 298

Stalker panic

By Anonymous - 04/09/2021 14:01 - Australia

Today, I was walking to the optometrist when I saw my creepy stalker following me. The entire shopping centre then sounded the alarm, so the rail was half down. Desperate to get away from my stalker, I turned around and walked out the store and hit my head on the rail in front of the employee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 856

You deserved it 153

It wasn't me

By Anon - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Modesto

Today, I got detention at school because a girl told the principal I was stalking her on campus. I wasn't stalking her, we just have very similar schedules. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 539

You deserved it 1 778

Subway creeper

By Anonymous - 08/07/2025 00:00 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I was creeping on a girl, looking at her tattoos and getting stimulated while she was sitting down in the carriage next to ours. From the looks of it, it looked like she was looking at her phone, but she was actually staring dead at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72

You deserved it 964

Creeped out

By emoney - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was walking out of my front door in the town where I intern. I live alone and know no one. As I'm locking the door, I see a golf ball wedged between my mat and step. I notice that there's writing on it so I pick it up to read, "You look hot when you sleep." FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 666

You deserved it 3 778

Obsessed

By Anonymous - 01/06/2026 15:00 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, my ex, whom I dumped in 2024 because she stopped caring about me or what I did, is stalking online someone I have just started dating. She went to her workplace, then called me to tell me I'm hers and she will never let "the other woman" take me from her. Not sure if I like the indifferent one or the jealous psycho less. FML

I agree, your life sucks 280

You deserved it 41

Creepy

By Anonymous - 20/12/2009 08:47 - Canada

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently duplicated my keys before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering, “He looks like Jesus.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 449

You deserved it 3 674

Oh, hai Mark!

By Erika - 05/05/2019 14:00

Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend on campus. Upset, I decided to go to McDonald's to eat my painful memories away. While in the drive-thru line, I realized my ex was right in front of me. It looked like I'd followed him all the way from campus. He thinks I'm a stalker now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 120

You deserved it 462

Caught in the act

By Anonymous - 14/01/2010 05:10 - United States

Today, I was on the computer in the library on campus. I was Facebook-stalking a really cute girl that I often see on campus. As I'm looking at her profile pictures, I turn around and the girl is standing right behind me. She gave me a disgusted look and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 584

You deserved it 44 908

Don't be that guy

By Anonymous - 19/04/2022 10:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was set up on my first blind date since my divorce. My expectations were low, but when she showed up, she was a smoking hot. She was way out of my league, she was delightful and kind throughout the date, but my low confidence shined through. That night she acquired an expensive dinner and a stalker. Me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 1 489

Walking red flag

By Anonymous - 04/06/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my creepy-ass stalker ex-boyfriend has been telling everyone that my two year-old daughter is his. Not only have we been broken up for more than 8 years. I haven’t spoken to him since, and I have no idea why he’s doing this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 90

Big Brother

By Maui_Diddy - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, an old fling said she regretted her previous choice and wanted to try again, so I happily accepted. She failed to tell me that her previous choice was crazy. Not only is he stalking her, but he's also stalking me, and sending her messages about who I'm with and what I'm doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 232

You deserved it 440

Go away

By pokèscared - 10/03/2020 05:00

Today, the creepy dude I’d been desperately trying to avoid was able to figure out which building I work in, the general vicinity of my house and which restaurants I frequent. He learned all this by the gifts I sent, not knowing it was him, on the Pokémon Go app. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 682

You deserved it 593

By Anonyme - 06/04/2019 02:00

Today, I went on a date for the first time in ages, only to realize that the guy I was seeing chose to take us to a specific restaurant in able to stalk his ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 366

You deserved it 164

Am I the asshole?

By Anon - 22/05/2023 22:00

Today, I fucked up when I answered a phone call. I wasn't sure who the number was at first, and it turned out to be my ex girlfriend who had apparently been stalking me. She asked me how my new girlfriend was, and as I answered it in front of my girlfriend, she's now depressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 687

You deserved it 246

Healthy relationship goals

By Anonymous - 10/06/2022 22:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I'm more interested in Facebook stalking a former coworker than seeing what my girlfriend is doing on a business trip. On her birthday. For a week. Where she insisted on staying in her ex's spare bedroom. That she decorated for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 907

Oh, hi Sharon!

By graveyard-sh*t - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, my psycho ex-girlfriend showed up at my new job to, "Keep an eye on me." The same ex-girlfriend who has been stalking me since we broke up. Two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 392

You deserved it 268

The old switcheroo

By Anonymous - 21/05/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I’ve had to get the police involved since I’ve been harassed, stalked, berated, and threatened by the wife of the man I was seeing. It doesn’t matter that I have hundreds of texts, DMs, and his dating profile that says he’s a SINGLE dad whose wife died tragically. She’s still coming after me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 621

You deserved it 138

Creepypasta

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got ice cream with a guy I'd met at a wrestling match a few days ago. When I got home, I found out that my mother had been sitting in the parking lot and watched us through the windows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 895

You deserved it 2 937

Kinda sus

By Anonymous - 20/07/2023 12:00 - Canada - Moncton

Today, I decided to reach out to someone I'd met randomly. I found them on social media and sent them a message. After telling my SO, he pointed out that that was stalking. I'm a creep now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 184

You deserved it 886

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I missed multiple calls from the company I applied to. That was the supervisor calling, wanting to hire me. I then remembered my idiotic voicemail I made months ago where I pretended to answer and say stupid stuff for 5 minutes. I don't think I'm going to get the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 019

You deserved it 55 280

Today, I got very dressed up and was excited for my uncle's wedding. While standing in line for photos, I heard my dad's voice from behind me say "Who's the hot chick in the brown dress?" My uncle responds "Uh, that's your daughter." Silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 518

You deserved it 4 838

Today, after our Christmas plans got cancelled because of COVID, to make ourselves feel better we made travel plans somewhere else, which also turned into a red zone the night before our departure, we are now going out for breakfast as our highlight of the year. Thankfully they are open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 1 247

Today, my friend invited me to play frisbee golf with him. On my first throw, my frisbee got stuck on a branch near the top of a very tall tree. This is why I don't do sports. FML

I agree, your life sucks 371

You deserved it 110

Today, I logged into our family's shared Amazon account to buy some gift cards for Mother's Day. I nearly had a heart attack when I saw the cart already had 6 items in it. Turns out my forgetful stepbrother was debating on what gazebo to buy and forgot to take the items out of the cart. Why'd he put them in there though? FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 405

Today, my mother-in-law died but my husband still insists that we go on our family spring break vacation. I don't want to because I loved my MIL and our kids are absolutely distraught and don't want to go anymore, plus we would miss the funeral if we went. But he refuses to cancel or postpone. He's being selfish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 430

You deserved it 89