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Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Periods

    Dad joke

    By bookworm94 - 27/07/2009 04:10 - United States

    Today, my immature dad said that I'm a girl, not a woman, so my witty response was, ''I have a period, so I'm pretty sure that makes me a woman.'' My dad stole my phone and sent a text to everyone in my address book, quoting me. Including the guy I like. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 51 865
    You deserved it 16 756
    Share  

    Red flag

    By paddy - 14/07/2009 12:23 - United Kingdom

    Today, I went to a neon-themed party. Standing by the UV light, I looked down and realised my pad was glowing through my tights. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 78 608
    You deserved it 16 541
    Share  

    By megan228 - 20/03/2009 21:16 - United States

    Today, my older brother and some of his cute friends came over. When we were inside, my mom yelled to me, "I got you some bigger tampons because you leaked all over your new underwear." They all started laughing. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 143 592
    You deserved it 9 030
    Share  

    Crime scene

    By isuckatlife - 22/02/2009 03:16 - United States

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, while changing my tampon in the stall of my high school's bathroom, I lost control of the plastic applicator. The blood-covered apparatus shot out like a rocket underneath the stall door. For a moment I thought no one noticed, then the screaming began. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 56 177
    You deserved it 5 907
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    Keywords

    Mysterious Miscellaneous Creepy Scary Plumbing Health Smoking Ironic Healthy Lifestyle Dogs Animals Anger issues Confused Grandparents Cute Kids Love Awkward First Dates Family Pregnancy Work Gross Weird Sex Intimacy Tinder NSFW Relatable Periods
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 164
    You deserved it 2 815
    Today, I met my boyfriend in Hong Kong after being apart for almost 6 months. We got to our room and got right down to business. I was just about to come when a voice came over the PA system in the room. "This is just a fire alarm test, sorry for any inconvenience." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 56 192
    You deserved it 5 953
    Random FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, my boss is writing me up for not signing a report before I left work. He refused to print the report that day, and I don't have access to the printers. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 23 329
    You deserved it 1 522
    Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 41 820
    You deserved it 9 647
    Today, I got fired from work. Why? I finally took a stand for myself and confronted my coworker of writing things up in my name for herself, and it getting deducted from my check. So she went to the manager and accused me of sexual harassment. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 55 122
    You deserved it 3 947
    Today, I got out of the shower and noticed a tiny leaf on my penis. With legs. Squirming. I have a new nickname. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 4 340
    You deserved it 565
    Today, I snuck into my aunt's house while she was working to raid her pantry, like I do most days. Excited for a snack cake, I went to the pantry. Apparently she'd found out, because there was a lock on it. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 96
    You deserved it 2 090
    Today, I am 9,958 miles away from home, it's 3 pm, and I have to find a store that sells electrical tape because my cats damaged my computer's charging cord back home. I just saw the copper inside the wire and I'm lucky the damn thing didn't catch fire. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 308
    You deserved it 129
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