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By Anonymous - 21/12/2010 16:18 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my 14 year-old son sent a broadcast on my blackberry saying ''I'm a young gay man looking for some fun!'' to all my contacts as a joke. What he didn't know was that it's my work phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 959

You deserved it 5 665

Read and learn

By Anonymous - 20/08/2013 08:06 - United States - Gig Harbor

Today, I had to endure my girlfriend crying and screaming at me. The reason? I'm not able to please her like the fictional character Christian Grey in 50 Shades of Grey. When she left me, she took all her stuff and left me with copies of the three books. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 465

You deserved it 4 430

Lonely, so lonely…

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Scarborough

Today, I held hands with a male mannequin in a department store, just to remember what holding hands felt like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 145

You deserved it 7 032

Mismanagement

By Anonymous - 09/01/2017 20:30

Today, my parents accidentally bounced some checks through a miscommunication. They now owe the bank $700 and can't afford groceries, which means we're relying on me, a 17-year-old girl who works at McDonald's 2 days a week, to get us by for the next few weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 217

You deserved it 538

Bad, bad, bad

By Anonymous - 01/03/2014 10:30 - United States - Saint Joseph

Spicy

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for years. There was just one problem: it was so terrible I said, "I think I might be straight" about five minutes in just so it would stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 475

You deserved it 15 703

By fouryearswasted - 19/12/2010 05:14 - United States

Today, I found out my girlfriend of four years is legally married to a man in prison. He gets out next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 954

You deserved it 3 909

Weekend Routine

By FML Videos - 11/11/2018 00:00 - United States - New York

If only this could last forever...

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 89

PLEASE STOP

By Anonymous - 10/09/2012 14:14 - United States - Puyallup

Today, my mother shared my phone number with my brother, despite my explicit wishes that she didn't. He immediately went and put it on Craigslist and several other websites. This is the fourth time I've had to change my number for that very same reason. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 832

You deserved it 2 474

Instagram Struggles

By FML Videos - 15/11/2018 18:30 - United States - New York

Still cute though.

I agree, your life sucks 230

You deserved it 87

Don't hate the player…

By Anonymous - 29/03/2023 14:00

Today, my son is such an idiot that he forgot he invited both his girlfriends to my brother's funeral. They started a punch-up over him and everyone ended up joining in since we're a very argumentative family. People got arrested and in the end both girls agreed to share my son, who was unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 109

You deserved it 288

By PuddlePirate - 07/09/2012 16:23 - United States - Mountain Iron

Today, my co-worker and I were having a conversation in Russian. Our boss overheard us talking, shouted, "I know you're talking about me! I speak Spanish too!" and threatened to fire us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 678

You deserved it 3 439

By crazycatlady1890 - 03/05/2019 00:00 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I finished a full marathon and just wanted to relax and get pampered by my husband afterwards. Instead, I spent the evening taking care of him and his back because he had a spasm. Don't worry, he feels much better now. Meanwhile, I can’t move my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 785

You deserved it 466

Executive confusing

By DoseyGit - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, while brushing my teeth I noticed a hair in the sink. Running the scenario over in my mind, I was going to simultaneously spit into the sink and throw the hair on the floor. Creating a big ball of phlegm, I threw the hair back into the sink and launched a huge mouthful onto the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 216

You deserved it 3 203

By Anonymous - 17/11/2014 22:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 297

You deserved it 3 808

Freakout

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my roommate to chip in for electricity costs. She called me a bitch, proceeded to tell me she can't afford it, despite working full time and me part time, and blocked me on all communications. Uhm, what ? FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 648

You deserved it 453

Whirlwind romance

By Anonymous - 29/01/2022 17:01

Today, I just got home from a wedding and cried for about two straight hours. The bride was my widowed stepmother and the groom was my ex boyfriend. We only split up four months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 175

By Anonymous - 02/09/2012 13:38 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I was showing my boyfriend some stuff I bought that day: a new thong and a bag of his favorite brand of peanuts. He was more excited about the peanuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 333

You deserved it 5 146

By anonymous - 29/12/2009 01:21 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me 80 times in 5 minutes. I had previously told him I was with my friends. He left me a voicemail proposing saying he loved me to death and he was crying. We've been dating for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 285

You deserved it 5 056

Just One Drink

By FML Videos - 01/12/2018 00:30

My bad, guys.

I agree, your life sucks 239

You deserved it 158

By Anonymous - 11/12/2010 05:10 - Indonesia

Today, I found out my daughter has a higher paid job in the same company I work in. I also found out she is dating my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 028

You deserved it 3 464

Denied!

By Cyrah - 17/07/2019 00:15 - United States

Today, I got rejected from participating in a depression study that provides free medication, for not already being on antidepressants. That's because I can't afford health insurance or medication, which is why I applied to the study. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 397

You deserved it 288

I have sex

By Anonymous - 05/08/2013 17:58 - United States - Athens

Spicy

Today, I wore a bikini to the lake with my parents. I didn't know that my back was covered in bruises, and ended up having to awkwardly explain to my parents that I am not in an abusive relationship; the bruises came from the sex I had last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 564

You deserved it 16 314

Suave

By ooblie - 08/12/2010 08:22 - United States

Spicy

Today, after receiving a lovely massage from my boyfriend, I was lying topless in bed beside him. Just as I was thinking this would be the perfect opportunity for some intimacy, he looks at me and says, "My mom is SO awesome." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 040

You deserved it 4 024

By PreciousIve - 09/06/2009 15:36 - United States

Spicy

Today, my husband and I decided to get a little frisky in bed. After we were done we lay spent on our bed then only to hear weird noises coming from our doorway. To our surprise not only had our daughter taken her first steps but has been watching and now making the noises as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 171

You deserved it 26 721

PreciousIve tells us more.

PreciousIve 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 21:58

*Clarification* My post is not fake, sex happens... And my baby was not abandoned carelessly she just took a late morning nap at her playroom (which is directly in front of our bedroom) and as most parents know trying to sneak sex after having a baby is like looking for the Lochness Monster. And since she is a light sleeper moving her to her crib is a self sabotage. So when all the sexytime happened our daughter must have woken up upon hearing the noise and being a natural 10 month old baby curiousity must have driven her to get up and see why mommy and daddy are making strange noises and since we didn't close our door so she can be within sight (why we close the door on her?) she went to us and watched most or some of the action. But the whole point of me posting it was so I can share a small part of my life to everyone and laugh at it, and isn't that the whole point of this site?

By ipayyourbillsgorramit - 24/08/2012 23:29 - Australia - Queanbeyan

Today, after getting home from a twelve-hour shift at work, I got into bed and passed out. My mother soon woke me up, screaming that she could tell I was "fake sleeping" and ignoring her lecture on how I need to stop being so "lazy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 476

You deserved it 1 912

By BW - 07/06/2009 21:49 - United States

Spicy

Today, I woke up to my wife talking in her sleep, "No Brandon! I don't want to have sex!" My wife won't have sex with me when she's awake OR in her dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 810

You deserved it 6 311

Thanks mom!

By hatedatwork - 02/09/2019 20:00 - United States - Shreveport

Today, my CEO called and spoke to me like I'm a child. Apparently, she has a surprise for me, "but only if I clean up my office first." She hasn't been to my office in months because she works in another state. Turns out, someone texted her a picture of my messy office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 874

You deserved it 1 961

Lost and found

By Anonymous - 23/12/2018 04:00

Today, I had to go meet my professor at 12. I wound up showing up almost an hour late. Why? Because she doesn't teach at the campus I registered at. I wound up having to visit TWO different campuses before I reached the right one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 263

You deserved it 476

By Anonymous - 28/07/2013 14:31 - Sweden - Ludvika

Today, I was crying at my desk at work. My colleague tried to cheer me up by saying: "Don't worry, I'm sure you will find a new job soon". I didn't even know I was fired. I was crying because my cat died this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 488

You deserved it 4 268

Late stage Lucy Letby

By mrdentist - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff

Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 292

You deserved it 5 622

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Today, my roommate's parents came over to our one room apartment. They found condom wrappers. My roommate tried to say they were mine. I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 424

You deserved it 290

Today, my grandpa told me he can still get aroused even though he is 84. Im 32 and have erectile dysfunction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 634

You deserved it 4 381

Today, my wife made me sleep on the couch because I ate the last Magnum Ice Cream bar. Last week, she bitched me out for singing too loud in the shower. I strongly regret leaving my ex-girlfriend of 5 years for this woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 514

You deserved it 1 946

Today, I work as a phone agent at a call center, which frequently brags about their awards as the "best workplace ever" because of their working conditions. In reality, we have to suck it up and ignore the burnouts from phone calls with Karen customers, and with the wage I get paid, I can barely make ends meet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 928

You deserved it 151

Today, I walked into work, only to be greeted by the office asshole saying, “Whoa! You’re still here?! I thought for sure when Trump ended that DEI crap they wouldn’t let you keep your job. Welcome back I guess.” Can we say HR MEETING?! FML

I agree, your life sucks 659

You deserved it 204

Today, I was in an elevator with a bunch of people in suits. It was so quiet, I tried to break the ice by joking, “So… who farted?” The doors opened immediately and everyone walked out without a word. I was left alone in my own shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64

You deserved it 621