By HeatherFeatherB - 05/01/2016 03:27 - United States - Mundelein
The Top
Happy Halloween!
By 4evalone - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Monterey
Perfect!
By BahHumbug - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Painesville
Thirfty and frugal
By BasicallySodaFlavoredWater - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco
By ilovekids? - 12/12/2015 02:05 - United States - Commack
First date blues
By Anonymous - 28/05/2009 20:15 - Canada
By sydysyd - 21/11/2010 23:43 - United States
By BlueB - 06/07/2013 15:42 - United States
By frenchboyfriend - 14/11/2010 00:28 - Australia
frenchboyfriend tells us more.
By Anonymous - 25/07/2012 01:37 - United States - Solon Springs
No thanks
By SadIndianLife - 15/11/2015 21:00 - India - Delhi
Eve of destruction
By Anonymous - 17/05/2019 16:31
By ItWasHotAsBalls - 22/12/2016 00:56
By WiseGuy0481 - 19/12/2016 20:18 - United States
WiseGuy0481 tells us more.
When we were together it was constant comments about how I was barely staying afloat and "how could I take care of her if I could barely take care of myself?". I was trying everything I could to make her happy but she would not let it go. It ended up being part of the reason we split. That was almost a year ago. I now work for a great company and make really good money. I just bought my car last month. I see her coming out of the store and all those talks came shooting back into my head. I just wanted her to see me happy and doing well....ok I wanted her to feel dumb and regret splitting up. Nevertheless I blared the music and slowly rolled right into a car backing out. Luckily it barely scratched it. I saw no regret in her eyes, laughter yes, regret no. So yes I deserved it. Karma sucks.
By Ihavelike3bucks - 18/12/2016 13:51
Ihavelike3bucks tells us more.
Of course out of all the FMLs I've submitted through the years - this is the one that went through. Anyway, I'm better now! On top of that, I got hit with the flu like a truck. No laxatives, stool softeners, magnesium, enemas, etc helped and between that circle of hell I ended up going to the ER. Ended up literally tearing myself a new one with an anal fissure. I've never been constipated before so this was awful. Oh also my first day back, our entire building was shut down and we all were laid off. Happy Holidays everyone!
By Wheel chair bound - 16/12/2016 21:14 - United States - Marion
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By screwyouchris - 16/10/2015 23:08 - United Kingdom - Brighton
Cartoonish
By mr_dinzaster - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff
Grounded
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Where's my shit?
By Still No Phone - 21/05/2017 18:00 - United States - Philadelphia
Newbie
By EggBomb - 01/12/2016 18:22
By Anonymous - 12/06/2012 11:58 - United States - Gorham
By M. Moore - 10/06/2019 18:00
Major headache
By Emily 1992 - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff - United States - Klamath Falls
By ItsGoneForever - 25/11/2016 08:58 - Netherlands
ItsGoneForever tells us more.
Hello guys (and probably also girls!), this is OP. I just wanted to explain as to why it was really awkward at the time. I never had any troubles with the escort itself. I became so used to it during our relationship that I even started guiding my mom and friends out of habit. However, she dumped me completely out of the blue. She had doubts about our relationship for more than a month at the time, talked about this with her parents/sisters/friends/etc. Basically, she discussed this with almost everybody around her, except with the one concerning the doubts: me. I personally never felt any doubts, we didn't fight much (just what every healthy couple does now and then :-) ) and my feelings for her never changed. I had even taken her on a 4 day trip to Barcelona (on my expenses) not 2 weeks earlier as a birthdaygift. So when she dumped me while in that park, it felt really unfair, it came as a great shock for me and I also felt some anger towards her which is why guiding her back home was really awkward and something which I didn't really want to do at the time. On the other hand, we didn't fight over it or anything, so it was also obvious for me to stay a true gentleman of course! I had a good talk with her a couple of weeks later and I didn't have strange or sad feelings when I saw her then. Today, it is almost 3 months since the end of our relationship and I feel I am over her. I still talk to her from time to time and we are still nice to eachother (though friends is a big word!).
Keywords
The next day (on her actual birthday), I wished her a happy birthday again and luckily I still had a present for her (I had planned on giving her the nicest present right before bed the previous night but when she told me her birthday was the next day, I kept it for her real birthday!). :-)