Love: Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back...

By PanFace - 13/10/2009 06:54 - Australia

Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML

agreeclassic 11 126

vote type 1 121 423

Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By Anonymous - 09/04/2017 16:00

Today, I got in an argument with my wife. I told her that I feel like she immediately disagrees with anything I say. She immediately disagreed and said she never does that. FML

agreeclassic 4 935

vote type 1 720

Scapegoat with fries

By Juan Carr - 02/02/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, after an argument, my wife goes out to cook her curly fries in our airfryer. The thing beeps after 15 minutes; my wife goes out and announces, "Oh that's great." "What's up babes?" says I. "I put the fries in the wrong compartment. It's all your fault, you wound me up earlier." she says. FML

agreeclassic 500

vote type 1 132

Sensitive

By itsevenworse - 07/08/2021 00:01 - France

Today, my wife is giving me the silent treatment and has locked herself in the bedroom, all because I politely asked her to put the dishcloth away when she was done with it. FML

agreeclassic 711

vote type 1 160

By Anonymous - 06/12/2011 02:31 - United States

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

agreeclassic 17 700

vote type 1 46 164

Tetchy

By Anonymous - 26/11/2023 00:00

Today, I got home and my wife asked me why I hadn’t taken the bin out or cleaned the living room. I asked her why she hadn’t done it since she got fired 6 months ago for laziness and since then has sat on her ass watching daytime TV instead of job searching. She threw a mug at my face. FML

agreeclassic 951

vote type 1 175

Fight clubbed

By Anonymous - 22/03/2023 02:00

Today, my wife picked a fight with a guy twice my size, then expected me to “man up and teach the bitch a lesson.” I’m not insane so I of course refused to fight, then she locked me out of the house for embarrassing her in front of her sisters. I want a frisking divorce. FML

agreeclassic 1 125

vote type 1 146

My love language is…

By Time for a divorce, I think - 29/03/2025 21:00 - United States - Edison

Today, I asked my wife for a kiss. She snarled, "I'm your WIFE, just fucking kiss me! You don't have to ask!" Later, I went in for a kiss and she slapped me, then yelled that it was my fault for "getting in her face." FML

agreeclassic 623

vote type 1 96

Get your act together

By Z…… - 14/11/2012 00:43 - Australia

Today, my girlfriend snapped at me for being lazy and incompetent, and declared that if I was going to behave like a child, she would be treating me like one. This includes safety-proofing the house, talking to me like a 3-year-old and slapping me with a wooden spoon when I do something wrong. FML

agreeclassic 9 788

vote type 1 36 046

By Mouhahaa - 09/05/2012 03:48 - France

Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML

agreeclassic 21 665

vote type 1 36 390

By crapedup - 10/10/2011 23:11 - United States

Today, I mentioned to my wife that we should try marriage counseling. She responded by denying it while throwing a carton of milk at me. FML

agreeclassic 28 063

vote type 1 3 078

influenza54 1

Tuesday 13 October 2009 16:18

Tooo bad it wasn't an iron skillet. LOL he deserves it

IdolChatter 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 16:13

Yeah, his command was an act of genius & worked out so well didn't it. He's lucky she didn't come back with a butcher's knife.

Comments

hateevryone 14

Sunday 3 July 2011 3:32

hahahhaha she torched your ass man, she torched your ass (in peter griffin voice).

Dominik222 4

Monday 4 July 2011 3:34

you're an asshole. she shoulda got a knife^-^

Kskotzke 0

Thursday 14 July 2011 10:34

I also think women should belong in the kitchen

txredneckgirl 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 7:10

i hope she left a bruise ass hole

chelseaaababyyy 17

Sunday 17 July 2011 7:15

i would have done the same thing, asshole !

winniepoohbear 0

Monday 18 July 2011 13:02

prick.

_drunkstars_ 2

Tuesday 2 August 2011 5:51

I would have done the same to you too

iluvlife797 2

Sunday 14 August 2011 23:51

You are a sexist dick who deserves a lot more than a frying pan to the face. Asshole.

deathnotelovaaa 0

Saturday 17 September 2011 15:11

YDI u ******* sexist pig

ryanbeast 7

Thursday 6 October 2011 4:10

that's assault.

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I walked in on my 17 year-old son masturbating. He froze, raised his hand and tried to use the "force" to remove the memory. I'm regretting ever having let him watch Star Wars. FML

agreeclassic 1 871

vote type 1 483

Today, I tripped over a ice block frozen to the ground and hit my knee hard on another. I had trouble getting up, so I asked my dad if he could give me a hand. He started clapping and walked away. FML

agreeclassic 28 478

vote type 1 4 206

Today, in the middle of sex, a bee stung me on the vulva. Definitely not the kind of prick I was expecting to get. FML

agreeclassic 966

vote type 1 175

Today, while working the drive-thru at work, an older woman asked for my phone number to give to her single son. After I politely declined, she called me a slut and threw her food at me through the window before promptly speeding off. FML

agreeclassic 14 297

vote type 1 1 036

Today, I went to my first ever job interview, in a totally stressed out state. The employer's first question was: "What's your name?" I forgot. FML

agreeclassic 439

vote type 1 98

Today, due to a combination of boredom and a faulty hair dryer, I now have singed pubes and burned balls. FML

agreeclassic 24 663

vote type 1 55 872