Animals: Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead...

By ItHurtsLIkeHell - 01/03/2010 09:13 - Malaysia

Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead of dying, it bites your testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 923

You deserved it 43 092

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Same thing different taste

By Roselyn Cazares - 23/07/2017 19:55

Today, I was petting my female hamster when I felt a big mass under her. I immediately thought it was a tumor so I poked it to see if it hurt her. It didn't. Turns out my female hamster is actually a male, and he has really big balls. I touched my hamster's balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 165

You deserved it 1 938

By whymommywhy - 21/04/2009 03:11 - United States

Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 297

You deserved it 26 978

By zac545 - 19/02/2009 06:14 - United States

Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 961

You deserved it 11 247

By roze198765 - 04/08/2011 01:19 - United States

Today, my cat died in the process of eating, and choking on, my hamster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 890

You deserved it 4 392

By EpicFail - 04/02/2009 23:29 - United States

Today, I fell asleep. I felt something on my face. I batted it away. It was my hamster. It died from a concussion upon hitting the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 789

You deserved it 16 013

Poor little guy

By Anonymous - 04/03/2021 14:01

Today, I showed my family my new pet hamster. At the sight of him, my grandmother, who I had no idea hated rodents, let out a loud screech, causing my usually docile hamster to bite me and piss in my cupped hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 945

You deserved it 175

So…

By Anonymous - 29/03/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and have to explain to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 775

You deserved it 7 632

By deadhamster - 03/02/2012 18:29 - United States

Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 460

You deserved it 5 057

By Anonymous - 22/10/2011 06:10 - United States

Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with his hamster. After a while of silence, my boyfriend came over and put his fingers next to my face. Trying to be cute, I stuck his fingers in my mouth and sucked on them. Turns out he was trying to show me how bad hamster pee smells. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 621

You deserved it 53 657

By HttpsHaileyy - 15/06/2015 20:02 - United States

Today, I insulted my younger sister's hamster. She then smashed me with a stool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 804

You deserved it 9 595

RedTriceratops 0

Monday 1 March 2010 16:05

But I don't have testicles.

cabbitt 0

Monday 1 March 2010 16:07

I hope you learned to look where you sit.

Comments

sparxva 12

Monday 1 March 2010 17:12

After the word about the Richard Gere experience got around the hamsters aren't taking any chances.

amiemariej 0

Monday 1 March 2010 17:21

"learnt" is the British used form of the american "learned". so who's the dummy now?

nnhoang 0

Monday 1 March 2010 17:27

Idiot Americans can't get it though their thick skulls that there's another English that non-Americans use. For the Americans that do know about the other English, kudos to you. :D

asteroth 8

Monday 1 March 2010 17:31

I wish I could learn other Englishes. I was taught the American one. :(

edgeofhysteria 0

Monday 1 March 2010 17:33

nicely said. *applauds*

idkweird 0

Monday 1 March 2010 18:43

The Streets has a wonderful song about this. "Two Nations Divided" "Two nations divided by a common language And about two hundred years of new songs and dances But the difference is language, and just the bits you got wrong 'Cause we were the ones who invented the language" Also, I'd like to point out the truth in that. Our language developed from UK English. Therefore, it is ridiculous to tell them that their tenses of verbs are wrong.

zippit09 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 3:38

^ Thank you! Glad somebody realised what was going on rather than blindly yelling out whatever it is they happen to believe is true.

mmmazingmary 0

Monday 1 March 2010 17:27

who cares it he walks around naked? so do i

asteroth 8

Monday 1 March 2010 17:33

For this, Humanity is thankful.

blitzen123 0

Monday 1 March 2010 19:47

I do too. Nothing wrong with it.

blitzen123 0

Monday 1 March 2010 21:07

I do as well. There is nothing wrong with that.

blitzen123 0

Monday 1 March 2010 21:10

Mmkay, said there was an error on first post. =/

Freeze_fml 16

Tuesday 2 March 2010 5:31

Jackpot.

edgeofhysteria 0

Monday 1 March 2010 17:31

Oh yes, you didn't kill your hamster, he just bit you. FYL.

twistedavalon06 0

Monday 1 March 2010 17:37

fake

GAYbrial 0

Monday 1 March 2010 17:38

Why is everyone saying the op was naked? No where in the fml post does he say he is naked. He could have been wearing gym shorts or something which the hamster could have bitten through.