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The first step is the hardest

By Jeff just jeff - 12/01/2026 12:00

Today, I went to the gym after months of procrastinating. I walked straight into the glass wall next to the entrance instead of the door. A guy lifting near the front desk winced in sympathy. I still worked out, but I could see my face slowly swelling in the mirror. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 138

King of pain

By Anonymous - 24/01/2026 22:00

Today, I somehow strained a muscle around my ribs that make any movement or pressure almost unbearable. In other words, breathing is just about possible, farting is excruciating, and I’m praying I get diarrhea, otherwise there's no possible way I’m going to be able to shit without passing out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 387

You deserved it 59

Treat yourself with kindness

By Anonymous - 26/01/2026 16:41

Today, I got so sad and depressed looking at my old pictures. I had such bad body dysmorphia from all the mean, nasty, hateful things my horrid family used to bully me for that I never realized I was actually pretty. Now thanks to an autoimmune disease my body will never look nor feel the same. FML

I agree, your life sucks 265

You deserved it 38

Hate the game, not the player

By Anonymous - 13/02/2026 09:00

Today, I really liked this girl, and it seemed like she maybe liked me too. We texted a lot, she invited me to a party, and we played games together. I asked her out, worried about waiting too long, but got a really ambiguous answer. Now she’s playing the same games she used to ask me to play, just with a different guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 84

Gamers will know

By Its painfully bad - 15/02/2026 03:00

Today, my wife got bored and went into my collection of old PC games. She started playing Mass Effect and commented that she loved it and wanted to play all three. I don't know how to tell her that it ends worse than Game of Thrones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 309

You deserved it 91

Fuse ignited

By Anonymous - 16/02/2026 22:00

Today, I got sick of my mother-in-law telling me everything I do brings shame to the family, so I meanly asked if her other son spending three months in prison was shameful or if he was already forgiven. It turned out that he told her he'd spent three months touring Brazil. Cue massive family screaming match. FML

I agree, your life sucks 569

You deserved it 83

Did it taste good at least?

By Anonymous - 24/02/2026 03:00

Today, I popped something straight out of the oven into my mouth. It burned my tongue instantly, but instead of spitting it out, I swallowed. I felt it burning all the way down. Now I can’t eat solid food or drink hot drinks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 655

Real estate from hell

By pukey mcgee - 25/02/2026 22:00

Today, I learned why I got such a great deal on my apartment. It's located next to the trash chute. It smells utterly foul three days of the week, and it's the dead of winter now. I dread the summer heat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 413

You deserved it 68

I have had it with these mf snakes on this mf plane! Everybody strap in!

By Who's your daddy, snake girl? - 08/03/2026 15:00

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me for refusing to have anything to do with "our" pet snake. The same snake I told him not to buy for his son a few months ago, because I knew the kid would get bored with it and dump the responsibility onto us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 80

Drive on

By Anonymous - 10/03/2026 09:00

Today, as a breakdown technician, I was sent to a woman whose jeep wouldn’t start. The tank was empty, and when I told her she got pissy, then calmed down and asked where to buy spare tires because her jeep didn’t have one. I actually had to show her the tire in the round storage case on the back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 64

Lookalike

By Anonymous - 17/03/2026 12:00

Today, I finally got with the hot guy from work. We were laying in bed, smiling at each other afterwards, when his eyes traveled down my body and he blurts out, "THAT'S who you look like! Have you ever seen Moana? Yeah, you look JUST like THAT MAUI GUY! WOW!" I'm a woman. A 5ft4 woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 113

Baby Jane

By Anonymous - 02/04/2026 12:00

Today, the boss accidentally merged her personal calendar with the office calendar, so along with a 10 a.m. waxing appointment and on the 19th it's "Mom's birthday", I got to see "Friday 3rd April fire Jane." I’m Jane. (Not my real name obviously, but you know what I mean). FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 74

What in the world…?

By May - 17/04/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I noticed I was overcharged at a fast food place, so I asked the cashier to correct it. He got an attitude, so I asked for the manager. The next thing I know, some dude shoved me, yelling, "Shut the fuck up Karen." I fell and hit my head. People in line laughed and cheered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 468

You deserved it 117

Quite the list

By Anonymous - 18/04/2026 20:00 - United States - Rock Hill

Today, I have scoliosis, neck compensation, TMJ osteoarthritis, a small brain lesion, unilateral hearing loss in left ear, malocclusion dentally/skeletally, pelvic issues, knee issues, gait/feet/leg issues, asymmetric looks and aesthetic issues, and struggling with hobbies/entertainment because of hearing issues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 75

i'm late

By Fluster time - 22/04/2026 09:00 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I work remotely and had an online meeting with clients in different time zones. I double-checked the time… or so I thought. I joined 30 minutes late, rushed in apologizing, only to realise I had actually logged into the wrong meeting entirely and interrupted another team’s presentation. My actual meeting had already ended. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121

You deserved it 470

Big Tony

By lordoftheweird - 06/05/2026 15:00 - Canada - Cranbrook

Today, my grandmother is upset I won't lie to the police for her and is now claiming that I'm involved in the Mafia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 369

You deserved it 61

Dang!

By Anonymous - 10/05/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, my husband allowed his 16-year-old daughter to get married. Every single objection and concern I had, they ignored. FML

I agree, your life sucks 470

You deserved it 83

Congratulations, you played yourself

By Danny - 22/05/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, I realized the only person who’s ever loved me was an old friend. She was an amazing girl, she was there for me at my highs and lows, but I didn’t find her attractive, so I turned her down. She has since then moved on and gotten married, while I’m still getting played left and right by women. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 622

What could've been…

By Sorry for trying i guess - 14/06/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I met my ex, who I still have feelings for, at a festival. It was my first time going after years of putting it off, and we had an amazing time. I thought we would have make up sex, until she looked at me, angrier than I'd ever seen her, and said, "Why couldn't you be this much fun when we were together?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 108

You deserved it 331

What did you ACTUALLY do?

By Anonymous - 23/06/2026 15:00 - United States - Dayton

Today, I got dumped, so I was sad. I was so unpopular in my friend group that everyone but two people "sided with my ex" in their words; the other two "didn't side." I'd told my ex that I hated her, so I asked my friend to tell her I'm sorry, my ex-friend then replied with death threats. Like WHAT? FML

I agree, your life sucks 89

You deserved it 394

Not worth a divorce, but still…

By NotMyFault - 25/06/2026 09:00 - Germany

Today, my husband scraped his shin while trying to pull down our window blinds. He screamed and shouted at me, because it was "all my fault." How? I opened the blinds the day before, and rolled them up "too high." I'm staying married despite all this toxicity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 329

You deserved it 172

New tech

By Anne - 28/06/2026 22:00 - United States - San Antonio

Today, I finally convinced my grandpa to try a smartphone. After an hour of teaching him how to text, he announced he'd figured it out on his own. The first message he ever sent was meant for me. It went to his pharmacist instead and simply read, "Love you. Thanks for everything." FML

I agree, your life sucks 276

You deserved it 66

You OK, mate?

By Anonymous - 02/07/2026 09:00 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, I went to my girlfriend's mom's horse barn. Then I stepped in horse poop. Also I am full of dust. Dusty boi. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44

You deserved it 129

Distraction free

By Anonymous - 16/07/2026 15:00 - France - Paris

Today, I bought noise-canceling headphones to block out distractions while working from home. They worked so well that I missed the doorbell, three phone calls, and a fire drill in my building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 240

You deserved it 135

Classic

By Anonymous - 18/07/2026 09:00 - United States - New York

Today, I was proud of myself for remembering my wallet, keys and phone before leaving for the airport. I got all the way to security before realizing I’d left my passport on the kitchen table, right next to the travel mug I also forgot to bring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94

You deserved it 358

GET UP

By Late again - 29/07/2026 00:00 - United States - Dallas

Today, I set an alarm labeled "DO NOT BE LATE." When it went off, I turned it off, congratulated myself for being responsible, and promptly went back to sleep. I woke up two hours later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73

You deserved it 344

Parasocially busted

By Anonymous - 14/09/2025 20:00

Today, I spotted a huge Twitch streamer at Whole Foods. I ran up to say hi but caught her making out with another streamer she just did a music video with… even though she’s supposedly dating someone else. She froze, I panicked, and bolted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 299

Final destination

By Anonymous - 21/09/2025 22:00

Today, I was giving a friend a ride to a party and I followed Google Maps blindly. After 25 minutes of driving, we pulled into a cemetery. The GPS cheerfully announced, “You’ve arrived at your destination.” I suppose it is in a way, but we didn't plan on being early to THAT party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 267

You deserved it 116

Great meeting you!

By Anonymous - 04/10/2025 09:00

Today, I met my online date at a café. As soon as I walked in, I walked straight up to the wrong person, and launched into a 2-minute ramble about how excited I was to finally meet him. He just blinked and said, “I’m married.” My actual date was sitting right behind me, albeit a similar but not as good looking man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88

You deserved it 484

Out of the frying pan…

By Anonymous - 16/10/2025 20:00

Today, after a five day bout of severe chronic constipation, I decided to get some orange juice and increase my water intake. The good news is that I'm no longer constipated. The bad news is that I've got diarrhea now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 112

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The Top

Today, the officers of my archery club forgot to check if anybody was behind the targets looking for arrows. I got hit in the leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 681

You deserved it 2 015

Today, I used a public toilet. After I did my business in the stall and walked out, I was confronted by the sight of a man standing on tip-toes, holding his penis up to the automatic hand-dryer. Doubt I'll get that image out of my head any time soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 780

You deserved it 5 646

Today, I was talking this guy I'm dating and stated that the only reason I am with him is because of what he buys me. I was joking. He then responded that he doesn't care because the only reason he is with me is because I give good head. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 501

You deserved it 65 879

Today, I found out I'm going to have to come into the office on yet another weekend to plow snow. This wouldn't be so bad, if I actually got paid to work weekends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 960

You deserved it 257

Today, it turns out the beautiful, "organic" artisanal soap my boyfriend gave me actually came from the 99 cents store. He just wrapped it in some cellophane and gave it to me. I’m currently itching to death from the godawful rash and hives it gave me. I may need to go to the ER. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 004

You deserved it 256

Today, on my lunch break, I was walking to my car balancing 3 tacos, soda and napkins. A gust of wind blew my napkins up the street. In my attempt to catch them, I tripped onto the sidewalk. The tacos landed inside a car. Its owner came out just in time to see me standing next to their dash covered in salsa and lettuce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 317

You deserved it 163