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    : 320



    Duped

    Anonymous - 09/01/2026 00:00

    Today, I found out that the girl I’ve been trying to get at from my job, and buying her stuff for, got caught kissing another guy at my job, who hasn’t done shit for her. But yet she says she cares about me. Actions speaker louder than words. FML
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    The DIY trap

    - 28/12/2025 15:00

    Today, I tried to save money by fixing a leaky sink myself. Fifteen minutes and three tools later, I had flooded under-sink cabinets and a new appreciation for plumbers. My landlord arrived with a wrench and a look that said ‘you’ll learn.’ I learned to call professionals first. FML
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    Control freak

    - 08/01/2026 20:00

    Today, I told my girl to go upstairs and change her shorts to pants since my friends were over watching the game. She came back down wearing even shorter booty shorts and a tube top. I was so pissed, I couldn’t even enjoy the match, and I know my friends are never gonna let me live this down. FML
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    How does this keep happening?

    Anonymous - 27/12/2025 15:00

    Today, I accidentally liked a coworker’s old social media photo while scrolling at 2 a.m. Panicking, I unliked it immediately, knowing full well notifications exist. The next morning, they casually asked if I was “up late.” I considered quitting my job. FML
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    Cranking it

    Anonymous - 26/01/2026 12:00

    Today, I was rushing around like a lunatic trying to get my shit together and knocked on my son's door a few times. The fourth time I did it, he shouted at me to just fuck off already because he’s trying to have a wank. Oops, and TMI son, TMI. FML
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    Winner winner, chicken dinner

    - 10/01/2026 09:00

    Today, I wrecked my car on the way to work, all because I could get free food from a restaurant for my team winning a game. My husband suggested it. Now I’m without a car, with massive hospital bills, all for the most expensive fast food. FML
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    I'm fine, I swear

    Duped - 06/01/2026 15:00

    Today, I realized the reason my neighbor keeps smiling awkwardly at me is because I’ve been waving enthusiastically at their security camera every morning, thinking it was a motion-activated light. FML
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    Help wanted

    What do I do? - 17/01/2026 09:00

    Today, my husband dropped a bombshell when he served me divorce papers and a set of tests proving that our sons (7 and 9 years-old) are not his. I'm alone at home, scared shitless, and my poor kids don't understand where their dad is. I can't take them to their bio dad, since he died four years ago. FML
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    New fad dropped

    - 23/01/2026 20:00

    Today, I made the horrible mistake of introducing my girlfriend to Renaissance Faires. Now she’s completely obsessed and insists on getting brand new costumes, wigs, accessories, etc. for each new event. She’s even looking at fairs several states over. What have I done? FML
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    False alarm

    Bad nurse - 18/01/2026 22:00

    Today, I spent ten minutes comforting a patient’s family member, reassuring them everything was under control. When I went to leave, I realized I’d been leaning on the call button the entire time. Three other nurses ran in ready for an emergency while I was mid-sentence about coping strategies. FML
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    Too tough

    Too tough - 18/01/2026 12:00

    Today, I was working construction and tried lifting something I knew was too heavy. My back seized up, and I had to lie down on a pile of plywood while my coworkers stood around pretending not to laugh. The foreman filled out the incident report and titled it “ego-related.” I had to read it before signing. FML
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    Short fuse

    Anonymous - 03/01/2026 00:00

    Today, two days after losing my temper with my smart mouthed 7 year-old son and slapping him across the face, I tried to apologize by buying him a treat and telling him if anyone found out, I would get in trouble. Today, I got a call from social services about the "bruise" on his face. FML
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    Dumb it down

    Petra - 31/12/2025 00:00

    Today, after I lectured my family at Christmas dinner about how schools are indoctrination centers, I'm now helping my kid with homework every night and realizing I don’t understand half of it. FML
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    Insecure

    Anonymous - 22/01/2026 15:00

    Today, my husband went on a boys' night but I found his wedding ring on the nightstand so I confronted him when he got home. He was wearing his ring. What I had was a brass olive ring for plumbing so now I look like a jealous idiot. FML
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    Not my problem

    I cleaned it...slowly... - 27/01/2026 03:00

    Today, someone (we don't know who) put a very massive and noticeable graffiti "mural" in the bathroom at my workplace. Guess who's job it was to clean it? If you said me, you'd be wrong. However, the guy whose job it was got distracted and didn't do it, so it became my job after all. FML
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    I'm confuddled

    Anonymous - 06/01/2026 03:00

    Today, I once again tried to purchase a membership for a hiking adventure club. I ended up purchasing the same annual membership for the third time. They have already helped me recover my funds once. These people are never going to want to go hiking with me. FML
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    Check where you're posting

    Lauren - 18/01/2026 09:00

    Today, I typed a vulnerable “I miss you” text to my ex at 1 a.m., stared at it, and meant to delete it. Instead I hit send… to our old family group chat, which still had his mother and my aunt in it. My phone blew up with dumb sympathy, a single eggplant emoji from my cousin, and a lecture from his mom. FML
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    Hip cat

    Teacher from FL - 25/01/2026 15:00

    Today, as middle school teacher, I tried to use slang to “connect” with my students. I said a lesson was “low-key fire.” One kid asked me, very sincerely, if that meant I was having a medical emergency. Another told me to never say that again. The rest of the day, kids whispered “low-key fire” as I walked by. FML
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    Lighting in a bottle

    - 17/01/2026 20:00

    Today, I have an amazing girlfriend. She’s smart, funny, educated, gets along with my friends and family, but she’s such a snooze in the sack, it makes me miss my psycho ex. That woman was a toxic mess of a person but she could do things that would make a porn star blush. What’s wrong with me? FML
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    Gullible's travels

    YouveGotFraud - 09/01/2026 22:00

    Today, I was house-sitting. A lady came to the door and demanded to know whose white car was in the drive. It was mine. She said she had video proof of me hitting her mailbox. I panicked, asked how much it was. She said $200. Later I checked my car. No damage. Impossible angle. I gave $200 to a strange old lady. With no proof. FML
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    Impulse purchase

    Gary - 17/01/2026 03:00

    Today, I wanted a Stranger Things flashlight, but I saw they were out of stock at Target so I ordered one on Mercari. The Target website later got more in, so I paid double the original price with shipping included. I’m done online shopping for myself. FML
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    Flash meeting

    Anon office worker - 03/01/2026 15:00

    Today, I tried to discreetly check my reflection using my phone screen during a meeting. Instead, I opened my front camera and took a selfie with the flash on. Everyone looked. I smiled like it was intentional. It was not. FML
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    New avenue

    Pride lost - 20/01/2026 03:00

    Today, my girlfriend and I went out with one of her guy friends. After two bars, we ended up back at her place and somehow the three of us ended up in bed. I was a Gold Star Lesbian and now I'm just a slutty bi girl. FML
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    Lifelike

    Anonymous - 06/01/2026 22:00

    Today, I leaned in to pet what I thought was a very realistic dog statue outside a café. It was a real dog. I startled it, screamed, spilled my coffee on myself, and the dog judged me. Loudly. FML
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    Scammed

    Duped - 03/01/2026 12:00

    Today, after I donated $250 to an influencer promising "insider truth" streams, he vanished overnight, channel gone, comments disabled. I called friends for a loan but they're dealing with their own bills. I skipped lunch for two days and now my car payment is overdue. FML
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    Let him have his fun

    Anonymous - 02/01/2026 12:00

    Today, my boyfriend ignored my multiple texts for almost five hours. I was panicking and about to call the police when he finally replied, saying he was building a snow igloo. Am I dating a third grader? FML
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    He sounds lovely

    I'll show you complaining - 22/01/2026 12:00

    Today, I was complaining about the weather when my fiancé looked at me and said, "Can I ask a favor? Can you stop moaning and complaining and bitching about every single little thing that doesn't go your way?" He continued on for a good five minutes detailing how much I complain. He's a dead man. FML
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    No fun

    Get your kink on - 23/01/2026 03:00

    Today, I asked my husband what he'd think of a threesome. He said, "The fun wouldn't be worth the stress, it's a drama bomb waiting to happen." What a bore. FML
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    Touché

    - 16/01/2026 00:00

    Today, I told my almost 18 year-old that she couldn’t go to a school event because I needed her to watch her younger siblings so I could go out with my sisters. She scoffed, “You have four baby daddies and not one can babysit?” and then went to the event anyway. FML
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    Dunning-Kruger

    Steve - 04/01/2026 09:00

    Today, I confidently corrected someone in a group conversation. I was wrong. Very wrong. Everyone stared while Google proved me incorrect in seconds. I nodded and pretended I meant something else. FML
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    FMyLife FMyLife
    FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, at my retail job, a woman came to my till with her purchases. After I scanned all her items, she handed me two small bags. One was filled with nickels and dimes. The other was filled with cents. Her total was $28.53. The coins amounted to $22.30. FML
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    Today, I started going on and on about dogs and their different types of breed, behaviours, expectancy, etc. When someone asked me how I know all this stuff, I meant to say, "I fucking love animals", I didn't think it through and said, "I love fucking animals". FML
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    Today, I got stuck making small talk with a neighbor I barely know. In a panic, I said “Have a good night!” even though it was 10 a.m. She corrected me with, “Morning,” and my brain responded, “Happy… time?” I swear she slowly backed away. FML
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    Today, we got on the plane for our honeymoon and her parents were on the same damn plane, going to the same spa resort, in the room next door, and my wife has the nerve to tell me it was a coincidence. How we supposed to get our sexy freak on, sharing a bedroom wall with her repressed mother? FML
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    Today, my two moms were telling some fairly obscene jokes about their sex life. When I told them to stop making such vulgar jokes, they turned to me and said, "What makes you think we were joking?" They then clarified that they were in fact being completely serious. FML
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    Today, I kept hearing a child creepily giggling in my living room. I couldn't sleep and got so scared that I started considering hiring an exorcist. Long story short: be careful if you have Bluetooth speakers, because your dickhead neighbor might hack them and start fucking with you. FML
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