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Koolala56's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that my dog is an evil genius. As I sat down to have a snack, he barked as if he saw someone outside. I went to check it out, but nobody was there. When I returned, I found my dog on the table finishing off my bacon sandwich. FML

By Anonymous - / Saturday 5 October 2013 20:23 / United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while watching TV. I thought it would be cute to try to kiss him awake like they do in the movies. He farted. FML

By Wow - / Thursday 11 April 2013 12:52 / United States

Today, I realized that my Twitter profile was very public when my business professor made fun of student tweets in class. My tweet went, "Totally bullshitting this business report" about the report I had just handed in, worth a large portion of my grade. FML

By imscrewed / Thursday 11 April 2013 07:49 / Canada - Toronto

Today, I offered to pay my boyfriend to buy me flowers. He still refused. FML

By flowerging - / Thursday 11 April 2013 04:53 / United States - Stony Brook

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 11 April 2013 15:42 / United States