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zozohearts

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zozohearts

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3228
  • Number of comments : 52
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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zozohearts's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 8:38pm<b>munuxi</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 6:56pm<b>Striker_Jr</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 9:24am<b>vanessa_tranz</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 11:37am<b>nathansmith1211</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 10:50pm<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 2:37am<b>gingerJ</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 8:07am<b>jazmin3012</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 2:16pm<b>hailey2649</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 11:31pm<b>weraru</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 3:48pm<b>elibel</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 1:35pm<b>Lika1712</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 5:45am<b>RabbidIbanez</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 1:53am<b>bdonxtreme</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 11:26pm<b>beaglegal</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 2:43pm<b>kpetrovski</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 1:36pm<b>DaiCarmuhh</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 10:17pm<b>Ilikepie467</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 9:13pm

zozohearts's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

zozohearts's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, I heard a weird sound coming from the ceiling. As I looked up to see what it was, a huge splash of water hit me in the face. I called mall maintenance to let them know. They told me they already knew about the leak... from the sewage line. FML

#17621192
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26655) - you deserved it (1948)

On 08/30/2011 at 1:35pm - work - by honeybee2487 - United States

Today, I tried to impress the guy I like. He breeds reptiles, and I happen to have a snake and a lizard. I went over to his house to show them off. He opened the door just as my lizard fell between my boobs. He had to help me get it out. FML

#17621188
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21928) - you deserved it (11614)

On 08/30/2011 at 1:35pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bought my daughter a bunk bed. After spending several hours building it, she climbed up, then fainted. Turns out she's afraid of heights. FML

#17620936
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28175) - you deserved it (3449)

On 08/30/2011 at 12:45pm - kids - by bunkbed - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got my first hand job. I started bleeding. FML

#17619671
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39368) - you deserved it (5294)

On 08/30/2011 at 7:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I tried to close my desk drawer by hitting it with my hip, like they do in the movies. Everything on my desk fell off. FML

#17618685
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9990) - you deserved it (28362)

On 08/30/2011 at 2:30am - work - by rojin12 - United States (Maryland)

Today, at work, I was walking to the back office, and I didn't know my manager was following me. After I walked through the door, without looking, I reached behind me to close it. Instead of grabbing the door handle, I got a handful of his crotch. FML

#17617939
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27662) - you deserved it (3355)

On 08/30/2011 at 12:46am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I finally found out that the tattoo on my lower back means "slut" in Chinese, instead of "good fortune" as I always thought it did. FML

#17612047
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12137) - you deserved it (52592)

On 08/29/2011 at 12:22pm - misc - by slut (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mum gave me half-raw chicken for dinner. After she refused to cook it again, I threw it away saying that I didn't want to get salmonella. She told to be more grateful, and that I was an idiot for trying to use salmonella as an excuse because 'it's chicken, not salmon'. FML

#17610443
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36970) - you deserved it (3371)

On 08/29/2011 at 4:33am - health - by SoupCanoe - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, while at my boyfriend's cousin's birthday party, I was hanging around with his sister as I didn't know anyone. She was talking to some friends when one of them asked her, "So, is your brother still going out with that crazy chick?" Her answer was to introduce me. FML

#17609422
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26148) - you deserved it (3853)

On 08/29/2011 at 1:15am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that I was adopted. I'm 46 years old with 11 real siblings and no one bothered to tell me until I found the documents in my dead adoptive father's house. FML

#17609010
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30260) - you deserved it (2092)

On 08/29/2011 at 12:06am - misc - by Ariella - Singapore

Today, I started my shift as a cop, patrolling the streets on a bicycle. Everywhere I went, gangs of youths yelled stuff out at me, like "Bike twat", "Pig on wheels", "That's a girl's bike you muppet" and "Go on wanker, do a wheelie." FML

#17607153
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28292) - you deserved it (7893)

On 08/28/2011 at 6:37pm - work - by Andrew - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I started my shift as a cop, patrolling the streets on a bicycle. Everywhere I went, gangs of youths yelled stuff out at me, like "Bike twat", "Pig on wheels", "That's a girl's bike you muppet" and "Go on wanker, do a wheelie." FML

#17607153
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28292) - you deserved it (7893)

On 08/28/2011 at 6:37pm - work - by Andrew - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, while bitching some girl out for spilling coffee all over me, she looks at me with accepting eyes and says after I'd finished, "I can understand your anger, big girls like you get grumpy when they're hungry." FML

#17606800
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12543) - you deserved it (42925)

On 08/28/2011 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to use glow-in-the-dark body paint to make an arrow on his stomach pointing down. I guess he thought he'd "spice up" the way he always demands a blow job before sex. FML

#17601968
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26819) - you deserved it (5788)

On 08/28/2011 at 2:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I excitedly showed my new roommate my pet fish. She then told me about how she purposely starved her last fish to see how long it would take before they started eating each other before starving to death. FML

#17597730
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28932) - you deserved it (2591)

On 08/27/2011 at 6:59pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)



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