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znorbnix

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znorbnix

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 March 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4208
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About znorbnix : Su'cuy, aruetiise. Ni dral darjetii.

znorbnix's page activity

Visits<b>ashesofempires04</b> - the 12/30/2012 at 4:55am<b>Cuervo23</b> - the 09/15/2011 at 9:41pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:05pm<b>EnEl_Infierno</b> - the 09/07/2011 at 12:26am

znorbnix's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of znorbnix's badges

znorbnix's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister announced that she and her boyfriend are getting married. Her boyfriend is my husband. We're not even legally divorced yet. FML

#20857902
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64840) - you deserved it (3889)

On 08/28/2013 at 1:47pm - love - by still together (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I almost got run over on my bike by a truck who raced through a red light. After narrowly avoiding a collision, the car slowed down. Instead of apologizing for almost killing me, the driver stuck his head out of the window and yelled, "Nice ass!" FML

#20854169
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37720) - you deserved it (3268)

On 08/25/2013 at 8:10pm - misc - by etgohome (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids, when a girl in line next to us slipped a hand down her boyfriend's pants and started groping him. I politely asked her to stop, to which she snorted, "Why? Your kids've gotta learn the birds and bees somehow." FML

#20852966
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47696) - you deserved it (4144)

On 08/24/2013 at 10:46pm - kids - by pda (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after I had watched a few videos of myself, I realized the sound of my own voice is the single most annoying thing I have ever heard. FML

#20847659
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43780) - you deserved it (5249)

On 08/21/2013 at 10:08am - misc - by shut_up (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I spent half-an-hour listening to my therapist telling me enthusiastically how people used to communicate telepathically before verbal languages were invented. FML

#20847442
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36302) - you deserved it (3272)

On 08/21/2013 at 3:18am - misc - by verydepressed - Russian Federation (Tomsk)

Today, I was showing a new girl around at school. As we were walking through the parking lot she noticed a green jeep and commented "I heard the person who drives that is a total creep. Is he?" I said I didn't know who it was. It was my car. FML

#20846340
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49699) - you deserved it (5696)

On 08/20/2013 at 1:40pm - misc - by mycar - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had a group presentation. I kept zipping my jacket up and down nervously. As I waited for my turn, I realized a bunch of classmates staring at me. I forgot that in the morning rush, I only put on a jacket. I only had a bra on underneath. FML

Today, I found out yet another of my guy friends liked me. I posted that I just wanted a guy friend that had absolutely no romantic feelings for me. My crush volunteered. FML

#20842536
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31455) - you deserved it (61580)

On 08/18/2013 at 12:41am - misc - by fail - United States

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend's family, and he was saying how well his driving lessons are going. During this conversation his mum told him to "stop blowing your own trumpet." He replied, "If I could do that, I wouldn't need Anna." His dad gave him a high-five. FML

#20836995
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63628) - you deserved it (8102)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by NoMoreTrumpetBlowing (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, while working out in the gym, I spotted a very attractive girl. I decided to pick up the heaviest dumbbell to show off how much I could curl. She ended up driving me to the hospital because I burst into tears after tearing up my bicep and deltoid. FML

#20831608
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23248) - you deserved it (60613)

On 08/11/2013 at 12:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was carrying a stack of paperwork at work, when my pen rolled off and onto the floor. As soon as I bent down to pick it up, a nearby co-worker, who's always hated me, accused me of putting on a show and sexually harassing him. He actually followed up by reporting me to HR. FML

#20830800
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41749) - you deserved it (2675)

On 08/10/2013 at 2:41pm - work - by his word vs mine = me suspended (woman) - United Kingdom (Stockport)

Today, I ran into my shitlord of an ex at the store. He took one look at me, yelled "You cheating bitch!" in a wounded voice, then walked away, fake-crying. I got so many dirty looks. The worst part is that I dumped him last month for cheating on me with my "best friend." FML

#20827624
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50085) - you deserved it (3342)

On 08/08/2013 at 5:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend was suspended from work after she was caught fucking one of her co-workers. FML

#20827542
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61526) - you deserved it (4598)

On 08/08/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Slough)

Today, I actually had to explain to two of my friends that neither Alaska nor Nebraska are in Canada. I think I need new friends. FML

#20827400
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41567) - you deserved it (4906)

On 08/08/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by ROBERT (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I confessed my feelings to the guy I've had the biggest crush on. He spent the next ten minutes calling me delusional, said that I know nothing about him, and laughed that "this isn't Twilight, for fuck's sake". All he did when I started crying was pat me on the head and leave. FML

#20826991
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52472) - you deserved it (9176)

On 08/08/2013 at 8:54am - love - by names suck and so do I (woman) - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)



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