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znorbnix

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znorbnix

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 March 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6649
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About znorbnix : Su'cuy, aruetiise. Ni dral darjetii.

znorbnix's page activity

Visits<b>ashesofempires04</b> - the 12/30/2012 at 4:55am<b>Cuervo23</b> - the 09/15/2011 at 9:41pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:05pm<b>EnEl_Infierno</b> - the 09/07/2011 at 12:26am

znorbnix's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of znorbnix's badges

znorbnix's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out why my husband has been coming home from work so late. Turns out he loves to help people. Specifically female people. And by help, I mean sleep with. FML

#21403935
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33515) - you deserved it (2506)

On 05/03/2015 at 1:49pm - intimacy - by I pick em' good - United States

Today, our new boss banned coffee from the workplace, comparing caffeine to hard drugs. His comparison may not be wrong; after two hours, I couldn't take it any more, and in between fantasising about his cold-blooded murder, I begged to be allowed just one last cup. FML

#21403720
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29461) - you deserved it (4569)

On 05/03/2015 at 1:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Finland

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

#21403147
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34309) - you deserved it (3808)

On 05/01/2015 at 10:22pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for public sex. FML

#21399557
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40472) - you deserved it (3099)

On 04/25/2015 at 4:05pm - love - by RBergman - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

#21399378
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32614) - you deserved it (2793)

On 04/25/2015 at 6:34am - love - by a critically injured shitehawk (man) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I found my son's porn. I would sit him down for a talk, but the genres were so disturbing that I'm afraid to even ask about it. FML

#21399141
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30275) - you deserved it (3567)

On 04/24/2015 at 6:04pm - kids - by anonymousyo - United States (California)

Today, my best friend can now say "I fucked your mom" to me and actually mean it. FML

#21397883
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44417) - you deserved it (3317)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out my best friend's girlfriend is cheating on him with his own brother. I went over to his place and told him everything while his girlfriend was in the same room. He called me a jealous liar who wanted to break them up, and kicked me out while she looked on, smirking. FML

#21396139
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30387) - you deserved it (2933)

On 04/19/2015 at 9:08am - misc - by Anunimos (man) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML

#21395896
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31383) - you deserved it (3183)

On 04/18/2015 at 9:03pm - love - by socialix - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I read my 10-year-old sister's diary. That's how I found out about her disturbingly detailed plan to murder me, make it look like suicide, date my boyfriend after helping him get over my death, then marry him. FML

#21395572
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39516) - you deserved it (5120)

On 04/18/2015 at 3:01am - kids - by Anonymus (woman) - Sweden

Today, while walking down the street, a cute guy approached me. We ended up having some drinks then heading back to his place and hooked up. Afterwards, I used the bathroom, and when I came out, he was going through his wallet and asked me how much he owed me. FML

#21391926
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32216) - you deserved it (9634)

On 04/11/2015 at 6:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was driving and someone was following me across the city and wouldn't let up, so I drove past my house, thinking it was a stalker. Eventually I lost them on the highway. It wasn't until I'd gotten back home that I remembered that my 'stalker' was a coworker I'd invited over for lunch. FML

#21390746
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14756) - you deserved it (37615)

On 04/09/2015 at 4:11pm - work - by Distracted (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was sitting in a library when a cute boy approached me, so I grabbed the nearest book. When he asked me what I was reading, I said I was revising for an English test. He laughed and pointed out that my book was in French. FML

#21384778
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15880) - you deserved it (19044)

On 03/31/2015 at 3:24pm - misc - by ip7 - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45981) - you deserved it (3357)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, my teacher reached over to hand me a paper. I thought it would be funny to flinch and say, "Dad, please don't hit me". Unfortunately, he didn't think it was a joke, so I got questioned by the on-campus officer. FML

#21368562
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14343) - you deserved it (42799)

On 03/05/2015 at 9:32am - misc - by jlol - United States



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