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znorbnix

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znorbnix

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 March 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6684
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About znorbnix : Su'cuy, aruetiise. Ni dral darjetii.

znorbnix's page activity

Visits<b>ashesofempires04</b> - the 12/30/2012 at 4:55am<b>Cuervo23</b> - the 09/15/2011 at 9:41pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:05pm<b>EnEl_Infierno</b> - the 09/07/2011 at 12:26am

znorbnix's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of znorbnix's badges

znorbnix's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my daughter babysit her 2-year-old brother while I went out with my husband. I told her not to let him out of her sight. She certainly did as I said; when I tuned into our internet-enabled baby monitor, I heard her and some guy having sex in the room. FML

#21460833
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22875) - you deserved it (2349)

On 08/26/2015 at 4:04am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML

#21458908
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10010) - you deserved it (29756)

On 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by notwhatithought (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I turned in an essay about a book I'd read over the summer. My teacher later called me to her desk and began to gush about how interesting the book sounded and asked to borrow my copy. The book I wrote about is not real, and the main characters are named after my childhood pets. FML

#21458720
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20570) - you deserved it (14480)

On 08/21/2015 at 1:15am - misc - by technicallywroteabook (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I approached a hot female security guard and attempted to compliment her new tattoos. Instead of saying, "Nice tats", I ended up saying, "Nice tits". My HR meeting is tomorrow morning. FML

#21455888
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21973) - you deserved it (8714)

On 08/14/2015 at 5:35am - work - by babbling idiot - Canada

Today, I learnt the meaning of the phrase "ménage à trois". I had always thought it was synonymous with "fiasco" and have used it several times in essays. FML

Today, a revolving door got the better of me. I made it into the crowded lobby, unlike my skirt. Bad day to wear a thong. FML

#21448563
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27161) - you deserved it (3440)

On 07/28/2015 at 1:18pm - misc - by Oopsie - United States (Vermont)

Today, I decided to start jogging to keep fit. I was passed about ten times by the same car, carrying four bozos whose vocabulary consisted only of, "TITTIES!" and copious amounts of giggling. FML

Today, I told my boyfriend of three years that I wanted to get married and have a child within the next five years. He responded by packing up my things and showing me the door. FML

#21447549
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23816) - you deserved it (5304)

On 07/26/2015 at 2:20pm - love - by rissa5214 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was reading a picture storybook to a kindergarten kid. She could pronounce more words than me, and corrected me. I'm about triple her age. FML

#21445328
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14614) - you deserved it (24478)

On 07/22/2015 at 2:32am - kids - by thebiteof87 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, a girl with a picture of One Direction as her desktop asked if I wanted to partner with her on a 70% law assignment. Two hours after saying no, I found out that she's a legal genius with a guaranteed job in the field and a near perfect GPA. FML

#21445322
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10873) - you deserved it (47249)

On 07/22/2015 at 2:18am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, I witnessed the most awful park job ever. Without thinking, I found a piece of paper and wrote on the back, "Nice park, asshole". Turns out it was an old airline boarding pass, and my name, address and phone number were neatly displayed with the message. FML

Today, I watched a young shop assistant try her hardest to flirt with my 20-year-old son. When he continued to be totally oblivious, she outright invited him back to her flat. When he asked, "What for?" a piece of my soul died at how completely I have failed as a father. FML

#21442690
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32553) - you deserved it (4583)

On 07/16/2015 at 6:21pm - kids - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my boss told me I wasn't getting the promotion I'd been angling for. I was so pissed off, I ranted to a coworker about it over lunch. Turns out my boss was just testing how I dealt with rejection before making his final decision. He overheard my rant and me calling him a Nazi bitch. FML

#21439888
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14195) - you deserved it (33773)

On 07/11/2015 at 2:13am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I stayed over at my boyfriend's house for the first time. He soon found out about my sleep-talking habit. I started ranting about "electron shaming" and I apparently passionately support their "sub-atomic lifestyle". Yes, he managed to get it on video. FML

#21439547
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26030) - you deserved it (3009)

On 07/10/2015 at 12:57pm - misc - by wantmeasandwich (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I learned how my coworkers differentiate between my coworker and me as we have the same name, when I overheard one of them ask the other, "Which one, ugly Leslie or hot Leslie?" When the answer was "ugly Leslie," he walked straight to me. FML

#21437500
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24013) - you deserved it (1657)

On 07/06/2015 at 5:32pm - work - by makeover-needed - United States



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