Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

zinoxity

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

zinoxity

4Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 15 July 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2982
  • Number of comments : 331
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About zinoxity : Hi there ! Excuse my lame username, I forgot the password to my original account. Haha.

Feel free to message me if you want to have a conversation or if you need someone to talk to. I love to talk and interact with other people. Making new friends is always fun. :D

zinoxity's page activity

Visits<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - 3 hours ago<b>april199</b> - 4 hours ago<b>KaylaRox1908</b> - 11 hours ago<b>AliFawaz2001</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 10:20am<b>cactusprick</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 10:54pm<b>GFerrari1010</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 7:15pm<b>erhmahler</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 10:44am<b>Lanker</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 4:45am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 8:13am<b>boring_boredom</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 2:22am<b>beezybaby4714</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 3:41pm<b>vaxc</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 5:56pm<b>Xraptor2</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 9:32am<b>coaches</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 6:02pm<b>orenjeo</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 2:52am<b>Juryduty</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 8:59pm<b>cohnsonj</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 8:27pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 2:00pm

Liked!<b>KaylaRox1908</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 6:44am<b>AliFawaz2001</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 4:20pm<b>dont_doubt_me</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 3:30am<b>FrostBite2202003</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 1:46am

zinoxity's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of zinoxity's badges

zinoxity's favorite FMLs

Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML

#18935378
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20552) - you deserved it (4261)

On 01/28/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I decided to get my ass in shape and went to the gym. I got motion-sickness on the elliptical. FML

#18778182
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20141) - you deserved it (5117)

On 01/11/2012 at 7:31pm - health - by tbw (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my coworker friend told me she was going to the restroom. Soon after, I did the same. Once in the stall, I could smell a stench emanating from the next one. I yelled, "Ew, you stinky bitch" and sprayed air freshener under the partition. As I left the stall, my friend walked into the restroom. FML

#18490582
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8977) - you deserved it (40927)

On 12/11/2011 at 11:46pm - work - by stinky (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the back seat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML

#18451653
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12996) - you deserved it (41239)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:46am - misc - by Notadrinkanddriveidiot - United States

Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML

#18254436
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12533) - you deserved it (56870)

On 11/15/2011 at 10:16am - kids - by Margo (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, in a large church youth group, we were told to write our current biggest trial on a piece of paper, crumple it up, and throw it in pile. I wrote "My mother's death and having to leave my friends and family." The one I picked up just said "math." FML

#18206362
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28348) - you deserved it (3479)

On 11/09/2011 at 10:52pm - misc - by Noslo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my 20-year-old boyfriend won't touch my boobs because he is afraid his parents will find out. FML

#18203488
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42367) - you deserved it (5068)

On 11/09/2011 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Great... (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

#18041933
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16919) - you deserved it (46064) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France

Today, I came home to find my house destroyed. I was so devastated, I cried. I had spent days hand-crafting the house to perfection, down to the finest detail. On Minecraft. FML

Today, while stuck in traffic on the highway, my 5 year old in the back seat asked me why the man in the car next to us was pulling on the other man's "peepee". FML

#17361677
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43588) - you deserved it (2767)

On 08/04/2011 at 12:04am - intimacy - by whatnot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

#15532710
483 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55175) - you deserved it (27681)

On 03/28/2011 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by dickface - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to the hospital as my girlfriends emergency contact. When I saw her, she was under a blanket because she had no pants. She had a seizure in a guy's bed and he brought her here. He's here and she wants us both to stay. FML

#15473081
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51639) - you deserved it (3989)

On 03/24/2011 at 9:30pm - love - by tannerpaul -

Today, I went to the hospital as my girlfriends emergency contact. When I saw her, she was under a blanket because she had no pants. She had a seizure in a guy's bed and he brought her here. He's here and she wants us both to stay. FML

#15473081
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51639) - you deserved it (3989)

On 03/24/2011 at 9:30pm - love - by tannerpaul -

Today, I was eating Campbell's vegetable soup. Halfway through, I started to read the ingredients and found beef broth. I have been a vegetarian for seven years. FML

#15129927
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14253) - you deserved it (49165)

On 02/26/2011 at 7:59pm - misc - by NoMeatFail (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML

#15105515
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16289) - you deserved it (46311)

On 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by verasam01 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: