yeezheng

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yeezheng

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 2 February 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8898
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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yeezheng's page activity

Visits<b>kingdutchhy</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 12:20pm<b>mattzawesome</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 7:18pm<b>___Unknown__08</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 11:20pm<b>ShooperShweggy</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 7:04am<b>constipation</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 1:21pm<b>Retaheki</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 2:55am<b>Jazzyw1997</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 1:22pm<b>G00N3R</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 3:01pm<b>brssps1</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 4:41pm<b>dragonfire5665</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 12:16am<b>basketball349</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 2:41am<b>curticus</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 9:01pm<b>cwl727</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 6:45pm<b>Bafrinn</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 1:24pm<b>ThatSlappinBass</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 1:14pm<b>Firewielder</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 11:32am<b>Pauliewood</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 4:25pm<b>SaraJun</b> - the 11/19/2011 at 10:26am

yeezheng's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of yeezheng's badges

yeezheng's favorite FMLs

Today, while cooking with my girlfriend, I thought it would be funny to slap her with a raw porkchop. She thought it would be funny to throw the hot cooking grease on me. FML

by Anonymous / 10/22/2011 at 12:07am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ate a bowl of my girlfriend's homemade chili. She went a little heavy on the spices, but I ate it anyway. An hour later, I can now say that if it burns going in, it will explode coming out your rear. FML

by DMStarsky / 10/21/2011 at 1:19pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I ate a bowl of my girlfriend's homemade chili. She went a little heavy on the spices, but I ate it anyway. An hour later, I can now say that if it burns going in, it will explode coming out your rear. FML

by DMStarsky / 10/21/2011 at 1:19pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, after a stressful series of events, I went to the beach to unwind. I sat on the sand, breathed in deeply and closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace. Then a seagull shat on me. FML

by targe / 10/19/2011 at 5:40am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my car broke down in the middle of the street. Lucky for me, two guys helped me push my car to the side of the road. Right when I was about to thank them, they stole my purse. FML

by mommydearist / 10/19/2011 at 1:01am / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, I went out shopping. When I left the store, I saw my ex, who I'm still crazy about. He helped me carry my bags out to the car. When I leaned in to give him a hug goodbye, he stepped aside, and I fell face-first into a puddle. He walked away laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2011 at 3:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

by Mini-wanker / 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

by Mini-wanker / 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML

by imy / 10/18/2011 at 11:01am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. He didn't know how to take off my bra and insisted that he'd figure it out on his own. He gave up a couple seconds later and played video games instead. FML

by Unknown / 10/18/2011 at 12:50am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while reading over my sent application email to a job I have been trying to get, I found out my brother had put "Heil Hitler!" as my signature. FML

by Unemployed / 10/16/2011 at 3:15am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

by adieuvelib / 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

by MLGreco / 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm / United States / Kids

Today, since I was taking a dump in my wife's parents' house, I lit a candle so that it wouldn't stink. While still sitting down, I went to blow it out and apparently, no matter how strong of a man you are, you will still scream like a little girl if hot wax falls on your penis. FML

by cduran2011 / 10/14/2011 at 11:23am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my students took my glasses, hid them from me, and called me a turtle when I squinted my eyes trying to look for them. This carried on for about 25 minutes. FML

by TurtleTeacher / 10/14/2011 at 2:09am / United States (Alaska) / Geek