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xlord

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xlord

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 January 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10684
  • Number of comments : 527
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About xlord : I have travelled the world and spent millions of dollars to discover how to make the best rated FML comments. The secret is to create 173 accounts.

....feel free to message me I don't (mostly) bite.

xlord's page activity

Visits<b>jerryj</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 1:17am<b>enginsteve</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 2:34am<b>Risea</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:59pm<b>HairIsEverything</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 12:16pm<b>MrConcise</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 11:06am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 9:52pm<b>xninix</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 11:44pm<b>HorrorJr</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 7:19am<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 4:34am<b>dude_itskayley</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 9:14am<b>xXsnowbreezeXx</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 11:19pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 6:29pm<b>Mrhammer404</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 11:22pm<b>rackyjr</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 8:47pm<b>cmonger</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 5:29pm<b>lilnikki123452</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 1:40am<b>TheCitizens96</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 12:11am<b>JonathanB</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 10:19am

Liked!<b>imateapot_723</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 12:18am<b>pptm</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 2:11pm<b>kayzers</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 12:20pm

xlord's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of xlord's badges

xlord's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife and I were driving to the gas station, she let me out before she pulled up to the pumps because I had to buy some things from the store. I returned to see my wife proudly filling the tank. Smiling, she told me that diesel was cheaper than regular gas. We don't own a diesel car. FML

#209822
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71278) - you deserved it (8006)

On 03/04/2009 at 7:04pm - misc - by Damn_her (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, my very religious grandmother walked in on me masturbating. She's sending me to bible camp. FML

#197450
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74692) - you deserved it (25501)

On 03/03/2009 at 5:14pm - intimacy - by camp (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I told my friend I hadn't had a period in 5 months. She asked me if I was pregnant. When I asked her if I looked 5 months pregant, she replied by saying "is that supposed to be a trick question?" FML

#196534
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45653) - you deserved it (16611)

On 03/03/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by booyouwhoree (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, the 75 year old blinding owner of the bar I work at called me over and told me to fire "Rachel, the stupid c**t after the next wrong thing she does". My name is Rachel. FML

#193676
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51743) - you deserved it (3397)

On 03/03/2009 at 3:26am - work - by nicooolea (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend was packing for her study abroad program. Jokingly, I got her a pack of condoms. She laughed, saying "Oh yeah, I'll definitely need some of those." Later, I showed up to take her to the airport and saw her open suitcase in the kitchen, with the condoms on top. FML

#190354
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35580) - you deserved it (30386)

On 03/02/2009 at 10:21pm - love - by badtrip (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I came home after a party to my parents, who confronted me. They said that my phone had made a pocket call to them and they heard a good half hour of people talking about drugs and alcohol. I confessed at that point. I checked my phone after. I hadn't called them in 3 days. FML

#185053
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17065) - you deserved it (60729)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:04pm - misc - by Werner (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was meeting friends for dinner at an Indian restaurant. I was waiting for the group to arrive and our table to be ready. An Indian man approached me smiling, so I said "We're not ready for our table yet". Then I realized it was my friend's boyfriend who I've met several times. FML

#181594
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9170) - you deserved it (62950)

On 03/02/2009 at 9:22am - misc - by neelloc83 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was meeting friends for dinner at an Indian restaurant. I was waiting for the group to arrive and our table to be ready. An Indian man approached me smiling, so I said "We're not ready for our table yet". Then I realized it was my friend's boyfriend who I've met several times. FML

#181594
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9170) - you deserved it (62950)

On 03/02/2009 at 9:22am - misc - by neelloc83 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I spent 300 dollars making colored flyers for my iPhone that I lost. On the flyer I wrote for whoever found it to call me and I would give a reward. I wrote the phone number of my iPhone that I lost. FML

#165039
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19302) - you deserved it (122474)

On 02/28/2009 at 9:42pm - misc - by Mike (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

#161178
1007 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73665) - you deserved it (752423)

On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I slept over at a friend's house. We decided to dress up as ninjas and play a trick on her younger brothers, sleeping in the basement. While sneaking down the stairs, in the dark, her mother came home. Thinking I was a robber, she beat me with a lamp. FML

#158758
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21312) - you deserved it (38523)

On 02/28/2009 at 1:40am - misc - by RosaP (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I slept over at a friend's house. We decided to dress up as ninjas and play a trick on her younger brothers, sleeping in the basement. While sneaking down the stairs, in the dark, her mother came home. Thinking I was a robber, she beat me with a lamp. FML

#158758
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21312) - you deserved it (38523)

On 02/28/2009 at 1:40am - misc - by RosaP (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was sitting in the living room with my parents when my dad asked my mom if she knew where he could find some double a batteries. She said to check my vibrator. He said he already did. FML

Today, I took the subway. The man sitting across from me would not stop staring at my breasts, so when the train came to my stop, I said, "Nothing to see now, asshole." Then I noticed his white walking stick as he got up to get off. He was blind. FML

#144886
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10757) - you deserved it (71931)

On 02/26/2009 at 5:21pm - misc - by belladonna (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while babysitting, the oldest little girl who is 7 went through my purse. She pulled out a half empty bottle of lube. She asked what it was and I told her lotion. I went to the bathroom and when I came out, the bottle was empty and there were 4 kids covered in lube. Then their mom came home. FML

#142269
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42186) - you deserved it (25362)

On 02/26/2009 at 11:08am - kids - by iailwkrb (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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