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xlord

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xlord

6Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 January 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11634
  • Number of comments : 529
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About xlord : I have travelled the world and spent millions of dollars to discover how to make the best rated FML comments. The secret is to create 173 accounts.

....feel free to message me I don't (mostly) bite.

xlord's page activity

Visits<b>Wicked_evie</b> - 11 hours ago<b>lolcat97</b> - 12 hours ago<b>PlainWhiteWalls</b> - 16 hours ago<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 6:05pm<b>shiffizzle</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 8:58pm<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 12:10am<b>sepsal</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 12:29am<b>swaftmasterj627</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 4:07pm<b>cheesecake25</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 11:20pm<b>xXmrmayorXx</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 3:24pm<b>EllieMay42</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 6:38pm<b>XxboxXbeatsX</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 1:28am<b>bazookajoe505</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 1:41pm<b>Dinoman105</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 11:31am<b>kemisha24131070</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 11:25am<b>poncho55</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 9:49am<b>kjax</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 7:41am<b>thepersonyouknow</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 7:22am

Liked!<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:46am<b>Dinoman105</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 5:31pm<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 1:08am<b>imateapot_723</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 12:18am<b>pptm</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 2:11pm<b>kayzers</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 12:20pm

xlord's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of xlord's badges

xlord's favorite FMLs

Today, I had artfully managed to avoid anyone knowing that I was moving into a trailer park. I showed up at the trailer where all my friends, co-workers, and exes were waiting. My parents knew I was feeling down and wanted to throw me a surprise 'moving in' party. FML

#495382
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60976) - you deserved it (4228)

On 03/20/2009 at 7:34pm - misc - by TrailerTrash (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw an attractive man outside the club I was trying to get into to. We talked, and ended up having sex in my apartment. The next day when I was dropping him off, I discovered he was homeless and was outside the club begging for money. My house is suddenly out of bread and cheese. FML

#448904
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32224) - you deserved it (140661)

On 03/18/2009 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by Melaknee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was nude modeling for the first time for a life art class. The only criteria for the class was that I not move at all while being observed. After a few seconds I noticed a really hot girl drawing me. I got a hard on. FML

#442796
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77521) - you deserved it (28501)

On 03/18/2009 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Opplyst11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at a Chinese restaurant, I'd forgotten my glasses and had a migraine. I was straining my eyes, squinting and rubbing my temples to alleviate my migraine. I was kicked out of the restaurant and banned henceforth because my waitress thought I was mocking her eyes. FML

Today, after work I went to the parking lot to my car to go home. I found my car doors heavily scratched and all my tires cut, with a note on my windshield. The note read, "F*** you, Jackson." I'm Tyler. Jackson is my co-worker. FML

#402387
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (182665) - you deserved it (9145)

On 03/16/2009 at 11:17pm - work - by Dansonn (man) - United States (California)

Today, my phone rang while I was home alone. When I picked up, all I could hear was heavy breathing. Convinced it was one of my friends playing a joke, I said loudly, "Get off the phone, you fucker, and don't call back!" It turned out it was my grandma. She had been having a stroke. FML

#386198
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39653) - you deserved it (86190)

On 03/16/2009 at 5:01pm - misc - by badgrandchild - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, my mom was helping me clean out stuff from college. She opened a box and took out some anal beads I got as a gag gift. She asked, "What are these?" I answered, "They are for massaging your back". She then insisted I show her. I massaged my mother with anal beads. FML

#300638
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31601) - you deserved it (65373)

On 03/13/2009 at 9:48am - intimacy - by DanniRae (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, when I was shaving , I wanted to see what I looked like with a Hitler 'tache. Since I was shaving anyway I just left that part and figured I'd shave it later. Well I was goose stepping around my room for awhile and then forgot about it. I ran into my girlfriend's parents later that day. FML

#297200
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10883) - you deserved it (69610)

On 03/13/2009 at 1:03am - misc - by Noname (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my friends and I were drinking boba. On the side of the cup it said "Please drink carefully to avoid choking on the Boba". I started to laugh at the ridiculousness of the label, and choked on the boba in a coughing fit. FML

#296354
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13053) - you deserved it (62981)

On 03/13/2009 at 12:24am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I called a priest "lame". He responded jokingly with "God will smite you!" I laughed and walked out the door. I tripped and broke my ankle. FML

#280211
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33265) - you deserved it (97056)

On 03/12/2009 at 8:07am - health - by lolzor (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was walking to school and decided to be a good citizen by picking up a beer can on the sidewalk. I then walked on to my school's campus where I then got suspended by my dean for "trying to rebel", grounded by my parents for getting suspended, and an MIP from the school's police guard. FML

#267564
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63315) - you deserved it (8265)

On 03/11/2009 at 1:04am - misc - by fmlmylife - United States (Texas)

Today, I was looking at some comments on a silly YouTube video of me dancing with some friends. Someone posted a comment saying "Girl on the right is hot!!!." Next to that, it had about 31 thumbs down. I'm the girl on the right. FML

#240683
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45568) - you deserved it (9376)

On 03/08/2009 at 4:47am - misc - by Ugly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a creepy man on the subway said he liked my eyeballs. It was the best compliment I've received in months. FML

#210139
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58532) - you deserved it (3523)

On 03/04/2009 at 7:29pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)



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