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xlord

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xlord

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 1 January 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7590
  • Number of comments : 490
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About xlord : I have travelled the world and spent millions of dollars to discover how to make the best rated FML comments. The secret is to create 173 accounts.

xlord's page activity

Visits<b>s3kShUn47</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 5:39pm<b>Demonface54</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 8:43am<b>Dark_days_end</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 12:57am<b>Kurt_Archer</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 8:38am<b>171819</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 9:38pm<b>423</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 7:46pm<b>LiiaaBee</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 12:27pm<b>pikawarriors</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 10:59am<b>DepartmentStore</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 6:51am<b>dontkilljay</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 1:27am<b>TheCrispyCat</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:15am<b>icandothecancan</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 9:39am<b>Rozay333</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 6:43am<b>Budderchook</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 5:43am<b>tatiana1126</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 3:23am<b>JVVortex</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 12:47am<b>MrImright</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 11:49pm<b>chamely</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 11:40pm

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xlord's favorite FMLs

Today, I ordered take out, and paid with a credit card. The cute cashier gave me the receipt to sign, and under 'tip' I gave a couple of dollars. I realized that I had given too much, crossed it out, and changed it. Unaware she was watching, She then responded, "Did you just lower the tip by $1?" FML

#1106901
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10584) - you deserved it (68819)

On 04/19/2009 at 1:03am - money - by imanidiot (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I locked my keys in my car. After spending 20 minutes on the phone with AAA, and then waiting a half hour, the guy showed up, he stuck his hand in the drivers side window and asked, "You couldn't just reach in?" I forgot I left the window open. FML

#1054531
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10481) - you deserved it (98656)

On 04/17/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by .... (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was eating some left over Easter peanut MandMs at work, when I exclaimed "oh cool, they have E's on them for Easter". It took me a couple of minutes, but I eventually realized that I was looking at a regular MandM sideways. Definitely explains my coworkers' uncontrollable laughter. FML

#1023184
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12434) - you deserved it (69162)

On 04/16/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by StewPit (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML

#1012847
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12999) - you deserved it (74273)

On 04/16/2009 at 2:47am - misc - by filipinoclari808 (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was woken up to my mom playing the piano awfully. I screamed down the stairs "you suck, stop playing!" Turns out it was my 5 year old cousin playing a recital. For my entire family. FML

#983061
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15956) - you deserved it (80535)

On 04/15/2009 at 1:14am - misc - by christinabear (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out my blood type is B. My parents are type A and type O. It's not genetically possible to be blood type B if your parents are A and O. This means I am either an adoptee, a mutant, or an illegitimate child. FML

#915764
422 comments

I agree, your life sucks (162321) - you deserved it (8264)

On 04/11/2009 at 3:14pm - misc - by hedgehog5 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend's friend told her she had seen me shopping with a cute girl. When I came back home my girlfriend punched me in the face and asked who the girl was. Apparently her friend didn't tell her the cute girl was my three years old niece. I lost a tooth because of that punch. FML

#910905
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88018) - you deserved it (4868)

On 04/11/2009 at 2:36am - love - by GotPunched (man) - Finland (Western Finland)

Today, brand new cocktail dress: $300. Matching peep toe heels: $100. Getting my hair done at the salon: $80. Treating myself to a mani/pedi: $50. When finally meeting the guy I have been chatting online with for 2 months, I find out he's my cousin: priceless. FML

Today, I had a bunch of parties while my parents were out of town. I made sure to clean up absolutely everything, I even vacuumed the stairs. As they pulled up, I noticed all of the trash bags filled with beer cans blocking their way into the garage. FML

#898279
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7572) - you deserved it (72965)

On 04/10/2009 at 6:17am - misc - by blah (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was riding on a stationary exercise bike at home, when I went to get off, my shorts got stuck under the seat. I dangled half upside down until my shorts ripped and I fell on the ground face first breaking my front tooth. I broke my tooth riding a bike that doesn’t even move. FML

#897879
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55560) - you deserved it (8773)

On 04/10/2009 at 4:17am - misc - by missy (woman) - Italy (Toscana)

Today, one of the Haitians that works in the kitchen at my restaurant said something to me. Usually I can't understand them and I just smile and laugh, so that's what I did this time. Later, I found out he was trying to tell me his father had passed away. FML

#891545
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16685) - you deserved it (52220)

On 04/09/2009 at 8:13pm - work - by ohhhman (woman) - United States

Today, I had to return a shirt to Target. My mom offered to do it for me on her way to work, so I gave her the shirt and receipt. Later, I realized that on the same receipt I had purchased condoms, lube, and whipped cream. FML

#873540
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15242) - you deserved it (74427)

On 04/08/2009 at 4:34pm - misc - by UGH (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send her a sexy picture. I asked if she had any suggestions. She said, "Your nuts!" She meant, "YOU'RE nuts." I sent her a photo of my junk. I offended a co-worker with incriminating evidence. FML

#869850
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36460) - you deserved it (89476)

On 04/08/2009 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by blizzard_of_77 (man) - United States (California)



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