About xlord : Rawr. That means hello in dinosaur :)
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, I was denounced for being a terrible person, because my family raises chickens, some of which we eat. I was then told how cruel I am for "killing innocent birds" and that "good" people buy their meat from the supermarket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41359) - you deserved it (2230)
On 04/26/2013 at 2:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico (Baja California)
Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (36530) - you deserved it (9433)
On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland
Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (41311) - you deserved it (3134) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by dr mamour - Sent from mobile version
Today, I found a lost dog and called the owner. When he arrived, I thought it would be cute to put the dog down so he would run back into his owner's arms, like in movies. As soon as I put the dog down, it ran away again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15000) - you deserved it (27275)
On 01/20/2013 at 11:34am - animals - by DrakeB (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, as usual, my cat was sleeping on my stomach. I couldn't fall asleep so I delicately picked him up and put him down next to me. He got up, hopped back onto me, gave me a slap and then went back to sleep on my stomach. I didn't dare move all night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25909) - you deserved it (10108) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/18/2013 at 6:39am - animals - by dormeur - Sent from mobile version
Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5388) - you deserved it (26384)
On 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by nekkidness (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31482) - you deserved it (1154)
On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6327) - you deserved it (21272)
On 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)
Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6766) - you deserved it (36826)
On 10/23/2012 at 12:25am - kids - by Bratty son (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15541) - you deserved it (8255)
On 09/21/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by RawrSparkle (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my cousin suddenly confided in me that he had tried to commit suicide by overdosing when he was 17. Shocked and not knowing how to respond, I blurted out, "Did it work?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (6268) - you deserved it (19538)
On 09/12/2012 at 1:40am - misc - by hahagirl (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18020) - you deserved it (1781)
On 08/17/2012 at 3:45am - misc - by Sarah - Canada (Alberta)
Today, while trying to look cute and playing with my hair in front of a boy, I pulled a piece of my hair extension out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5290) - you deserved it (30096)
On 07/22/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by Roma-Jay - United Kingdom (Coventry)
Today, I found out my late grandfather left me a significant amount of money in his will. I thought it was weird because he always acted like he hated me. When I got the envelope, there was $500,000 inside, all in Monopoly money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27427) - you deserved it (2083)
On 07/20/2012 at 1:13am - money - by Rachel - United States
Today, while looking through pictures of my boyfriend and me on Facebook, I noticed that in practically every single one featuring my best friend, his eyes are directed down her shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19948) - you deserved it (382)
On 07/07/2012 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Friday 24 May 2013
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