About xgirlofglassx : Having been reading FML and comments for over a year now, I decided to finally make an account. Yippie.
I'm not planning on commenting much; I prefer to lurk in the shadows and observe others. It's worked out pretty well so far.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, at school, a guy walked up to me and said I look a little too young to be at high school. I told him that I'm sixteen years old. He stared at my chest for several long seconds, muttered "What the fuck?" and walked off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19206) - you deserved it (1555)
On 09/17/2012 at 7:14pm - misc - by wtf yourself, cunt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I took my daughter to a pony ride at the fair. I paid to have her picture taken, and when we got home, I emailed it to my mom. She replied, disgustedly pointing out that the pretty little pony was displaying a pretty little penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11866) - you deserved it (1330)
On 09/17/2012 at 1:16pm - animals - by :,< - United States
Today, I was showering at my dorm. I had my clothes locked in a locker and my towel and robe hanging outside the stall. Someone took off with my towel and robe, which had my keys. I had to walk down three flights of stairs to get an extra key in nothing but a plastic shower curtain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15156) - you deserved it (1305)
On 09/16/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by Blueberry (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, after having recently moved into shared accommodations, my prankster of a room-mate has somehow made sure I've yet again woken up with a tampon in my mouth. It's been three times in the past week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13204) - you deserved it (1105)
On 08/22/2012 at 7:10pm - misc - by idontbleedfromthere (woman) - United States (California)
Today, after volleyball practice, I noticed my pants were missing. Now I have to go to work wearing spandex bottoms, all because one of my teammates is a thieving douche. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15702) - you deserved it (1441)
On 08/21/2012 at 12:39pm - work - by Rimmy Jobs (woman) - United States
Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21849) - you deserved it (1120)
On 08/13/2012 at 3:25pm - misc - by jannister (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)
Today, while trying to look cute and playing with my hair in front of a boy, I pulled a piece of my hair extension out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5588) - you deserved it (36540)
On 07/22/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by Roma-Jay - United Kingdom (Coventry)
Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7715) - you deserved it (26995)
On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States
Today, my husband and I agreed that he would name our first born and I would name our second. He's dead-set on naming our child "Raindropp" no matter whether it's a boy or girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19074) - you deserved it (5163)
On 07/16/2012 at 4:57pm - kids - by trisha (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24824) - you deserved it (2159)
On 06/04/2012 at 12:34am - misc - by whattheheck - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14640) - you deserved it (4247)
On 05/28/2012 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Danny (man) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, after spending about 5 grand on my home studio over the past year, I realized I have no musical talent whatsoever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5737) - you deserved it (28103)
On 05/22/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by gaga - United States (California)
Today, I pulled into a parking lot and waited for a car to back out so I could take their spot. The apparently batshit insane psychopath in the other car managed to completely overlook me waving him out, and backed straight into my car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14728) - you deserved it (4084)
On 02/05/2012 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I left my window open while practicing the saxophone. My drunk neighbours showed their appreciation for the music with a well-aimed firecracker that set my mattress on fire. My landlord has threatened to evict me as she thinks I set it off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19687) - you deserved it (4373)
On 10/12/2011 at 4:13am - misc - by ItaliczZz (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my dad came to confiscate my phone. I stuck it in between my boobs so he wouldn't be able to see it. He said, "Honey, your breasts aren't big enough to hide that." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11150) - you deserved it (27796)
On 10/08/2011 at 1:03pm - misc - by G - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
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