About wrinklytesticle : ;)
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Today, I enjoyed a lovely family dinner, but my irritating grandma kept trying to buy my purse off me, and kept picking it up to look at it. When I got home I realized all my cash and cigarettes were gone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14690) - you deserved it (1705)
On 11/05/2012 at 5:11pm - money - by Brooklyn - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18485) - you deserved it (1730)
On 11/05/2012 at 10:58am - misc - by Spoilicious - Singapore
Today, I woke up with a vague memory of buying something last night while drunk. According to my credit card summary I made a $270 purchase from a home shopping channel. I guess in 5-7 days I'll find out what it was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6942) - you deserved it (17321)
On 11/04/2012 at 11:37am - money - by fnfantastic - United States (Indiana)
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26721) - you deserved it (3630)
On 11/02/2012 at 9:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, my manager made me stay at work for an extra four hours, making me miss an urgent specialist appointment I'd scheduled months ago. Why? Because her neighbor's dog was having puppies, and she wanted to go home early and see them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16524) - you deserved it (1616)
On 11/02/2012 at 1:53am - work - by whytetrash - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, after losing twenty pounds to please my husband, the only comment I received was, "At least now only your personality sucks." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22428) - you deserved it (3256)
On 11/02/2012 at 12:17am - love - by 123alleyesonme - United States (Texas)
Today, dressed in my sexiest nightie, I asked my boyfriend in the most sensual voice possible what he'd like me do to for him tonight. His eyed widened, he started clapping wildly and then shrieked, "SPAGHETTI CARBONARA!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (18012) - you deserved it (3072) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 11/01/2012 at 7:48am - love - by Anonymous - France (Picardie)
Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27015) - you deserved it (1893)
On 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm - kids - by ananymous - United States (New York)
Today, I dressed up like a pirate, dressed my dog as a parrot and bought $30 worth of candy to pass out to trick-or-treaters. I waited by the door for 3 hours. Not one kid came. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20231) - you deserved it (1574)
On 10/31/2012 at 8:40pm - misc - by hallofail (man) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I was at a barbeque with my family, my boyfriend, and some mutual acquaintances. Someone jokingly called my boyfriend a pussy, to which he loudly replied, "I guess I am what I eat!" My mother was sitting across from us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18367) - you deserved it (2453)
On 10/31/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I told my dad and brother that I want to take Zumba classes. My brother said, "Did you hear that? Pumbaa wants to Zumba!" Then he starting dancing and making pig noises. My dad high-fived him. When my mom heard, she high-fived him too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18149) - you deserved it (2104)
On 10/31/2012 at 6:06am - misc - by hakuna matata - United States (California)
Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17269) - you deserved it (2926)
On 10/30/2012 at 10:27am - misc - by Obi1Shinobi - United States
Today, I found out that my girlfriend has secretly been conditioning me to get turned on by the smell of bananas. Guess whose new co-worker peels a nice, fragrant banana five times a day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21010) - you deserved it (2130)
On 10/29/2012 at 8:42pm - intimacy - by SadExperiment (man) - United States (California)
Today, my dad watched the news and decided to start preparing for Hurricane Sandy by buying $300 worth of long-life and canned food. We live in Australia. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22659) - you deserved it (1225)
On 10/29/2012 at 8:03am - misc - by StormSeason (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (17249) - you deserved it (3561)
On 10/28/2012 at 12:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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