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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
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  • Number of visits : 473
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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wooley29's page activity

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wooley29's favorite FMLs

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43610) - you deserved it (6638)

On 07/11/2014 at 4:34pm - health - by soundslikeadumbcommentersituation (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband wanted me to "spice up" our sex life. I guess he didn't count on me vomiting when he came in my mouth. We won't be getting intimate again for a long, long time now. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51388) - you deserved it (11524)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old daughter lying on her bed, repeatedly opening and closing her legs. I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, "Trying to queef. I saw it online." FML


I agree, your life sucks (58054) - you deserved it (7175)

On 04/19/2013 at 6:04pm - kids - by reyoflight (man) - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, I took the day off work to be with my wife, since she's always bemoaning my lack of romantic gestures. As thanks, she spent most of the day reading Fifty Shades of Grey, which is basically a blatant plagiarism of Twilight, starring a pair of two-dimensional BDSM freaks. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20818) - you deserved it (3739)

On 05/22/2012 at 12:11pm - love - by boblaj (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I had to sit my 13-year-old son down and explain to him that I'd noticed that his pajamas feel a little "crispy" when I pick them up to do the laundry, and ask if he could start using tissues when having some "alone time." FML


I agree, your life sucks (36677) - you deserved it (6060)

On 02/01/2012 at 2:11am - intimacy - by stainseverywhere (woman) - United States (Washington)

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