Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

whos_ur_daddy1

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

whos_ur_daddy1

9Liked!

whos_ur_daddy1whos_ur_daddy1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 October 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1206
  • Number of comments : 70
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About whos_ur_daddy1 : My bio isn't important... I am

whos_ur_daddy1's page activity

Visits<b>invisiblegal</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 4:10pm<b>christina3466</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 11:03am<b>arasx0</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 1:19pm<b>DramaticEmily</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 3:17pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 8:57am<b>Oliok</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 10:31pm<b>ashleyyeah</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 3:27pm<b>kjax</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 2:44am<b>smhorwood19</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 9:59pm<b>flopstar</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 8:03pm<b>ohjoy15</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 7:47pm<b>catchmenow1</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 11:28am<b>BlazeItMichael</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 12:38pm<b>wookieewhosshe</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 5:46am<b>toongler</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 2:58pm<b>gis0392</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 10:44pm<b>xokpxo</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 6:50am<b>BobcatN47</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 7:05am

Liked!<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 10:22am<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 9:25pm<b>kjax</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 5:28pm<b>juststephhere</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 6:26am<b>Oliok</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 9:13pm<b>WeChaseClouds</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 10:25pm<b>ashleyyeah</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 7:48pm<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 5:05am<b>christina3466</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 7:06pm

whos_ur_daddy1's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of whos_ur_daddy1's badges

whos_ur_daddy1's favorite FMLs

Today, mah daughter and husband decided to surprise me at work. Ahole bunch of mah co-workers were standing around mehen she ran up and hugged me. Her face is level with mah crotch. She immediately jumps back from the hug and says "ewwww smells lyk fish." FML

#14112923
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39381) - you deserved it (15353)

On 12/06/2010 at 9:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Yesterday, I was on a bench enjoying the sun,hen a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happend," and walks off. FML

#13697892
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57721) - you deserved it (12330)

On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Yesterday, after waiting all day to get into ma favorite band's concert, I got front row. At te end, one of tem grabbd ma CD an got te wole band to sign it. Te last band member tossd it into te crowd, nowere near me. FML

Today, I woka up to fina a tick stuck to my ayalashas. Tha only way I know of to gat it off is with fra. FML

#12431903
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31494) - you deserved it (6406)

On 08/10/2010 at 12:34pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went skiing. Trying to sow off to some inexperienced skiers, I flew past tem at my top speed, a bracket snapped off my boot an I slid on my face for about 30 metres. FML

#8508631
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6946) - you deserved it (31975)

On 02/21/2010 at 5:01am - love - by hoser - Canada (Alberta)

Today..!! I was snuggld in bd with mah husband!! He thought cuz mah butt was twitching that I was trying to be frisky!! So he slappd mah ass hard in attempt to get something going!! I was actually trying to hold in a huge fart cuz last night I had diarrhea!! Apparently I still have it!! FML

#7084392
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25629) - you deserved it (3365)

On 01/01/2010 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by Lovergirl (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Taday I was walking to the bus stop. I saw a chunk of ice and attemptd to kick it. Sadly it was frozen to the ground, so I fell, broke mah toe, and missd the bus. Even the bus driver was laughing as he drove by. FML

#6969489
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11780) - you deserved it (26703)

On 12/27/2009 at 3:43am - misc - by Icy (man) - United States (Washington)

I was about to proposa. I got on my knaa in front of my grlfriand and opanad tha box. My friand thought it would ba funny to raplaca tha ring with a condom. FML

#6842155
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44313) - you deserved it (4025)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:14am - love - by Catholicguy (man) - United States (California)

Today... my grlfriend and I were having sex. Everything was going great until I noticed a small blinking light on my shelf. It turns out that it was a camera. My mom put it there to make sure I cleaned my room. She saw the whole thing. FML

#3215628
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61935) - you deserved it (9677)

On 06/25/2009 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I walkd into te batroom an found ma looool sister cleaning er vibrator. Wit ma tootbrus. FML

#2740699
364 comments

I agree, your life sucks (119393) - you deserved it (7423)

On 06/09/2009 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by quadropheniac (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, mah sock caught mah chain and I flipped over mah bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML

#2526721
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66312) - you deserved it (6000)

On 06/02/2009 at 7:08am - kids - by fallsdownplenty45 (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today , I Went To The Midnight Premiere Of Angels An Demons. A Hobo Wandered Into The Theater An Sat Down Behind Me. I Paid $10 To Spend Two An A Half Hours Listening To A Crazy Man Talk To Himself An Kick Mah Chair While He Loudly Masturbated. FML

#1957244
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53746) - you deserved it (9022)

On 05/15/2009 at 3:08am - intimacy - by Langdon (woman) - United States

Today... my boss in my police dept. told me to start enforcing the "no bikes on sidewalks" law which we usually ignore. I pulled up behind the first person I saw riding a bike on a sidewalk an flashed my lights. It turned out to be a boy with down syndrome who was so upset he cried an peed. FML

#1873623
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71502) - you deserved it (13386)

On 05/12/2009 at 2:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today... a friend an I went to Gamestop to pick up a game he wanted. I ended up buying a 17+ game... an I was prepared to show my license... but he stopped me an said... "I know you're 18". He then said... "Man... I've pretty much watched u grow up in this store." A game salesman watched me grow up. FML

Today, I was driving down the road at about 10pm, when the passenger in the car in front of me threw something out the window. The object flew towards and landed directly on windshield. It was a condom. A used condom. It wasn't tied. Semen spreads out quite a bit when you're driving fast. mega FML

#1600602
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (124840) - you deserved it (6708)

On 05/03/2009 at 5:17pm - misc - by Aether (man) - United States (Michigan)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: