About warehouse_rat : the name says it all im a warehouse rat means i love working in and running warehouses no im not a moron i just love to have my freedom to be myself and not to be judged
Mobility
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Today, I discovered the "may have a laxative effect" warning on my sugar-free jelly beans should actually read "don't fart after consuming". FML
I agree, your life sucks (22465) - you deserved it (3492)
On 03/14/2013 at 2:21am - health - by Kimberpoo (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was discussing with my husband how it was time I stopped taking birth control so we could have a baby. He looked at me and said sincerely, "We're a little young to be having kids, don't you think?". He's 35 and I'm 32. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26076) - you deserved it (3445)
On 01/20/2013 at 8:13am - love - by StillTooYoung (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex when the condom broke. He told me to go put a tampon in to "soak up the kids". How did he graduate? FML
I agree, your life sucks (30626) - you deserved it (4317)
On 12/01/2012 at 9:54am - intimacy - by me. - United States
Today, I was waitressing for a huge family. Their bill was $750. Excited about the tip, I was shocked to see only $0.50. As they were leaving, I threw the two whole quarters at their heads. Guess who also got fired today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13636) - you deserved it (28973)
On 11/06/2012 at 5:37pm - work - by Misunderstood Waitress (woman) - United States
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at him and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late for Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said that joke had been done to death, to which my dad retorted, "Yeah, so has your mum." Instant fistfight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22059) - you deserved it (2329)
On 11/02/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by for fuck sake dad (woman) - Ireland (Limerick)
Today, I went out and made build-a-bears that looked like my daughter and her new boyfriend. It turns out she had been insisting that I didn't for a good reason; upon sight of his, her boyfriend screamed and fled the house. Turns out he was nearly mauled to death by a bear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11665) - you deserved it (17604)
On 10/08/2012 at 9:51pm - kids - by ScaryBears (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head on the living room couch. Apparently his two cats didn't approve, and they started attacking my face. Luckily for him, since my boyfriend was holding my head down, his privates didn't get a scratch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18678) - you deserved it (3444)
On 08/15/2012 at 1:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)
Today, my husband called me in the middle of the morning. He was in jail and wanted me to bail him out. Not only was he stupid enough to go drunk drag-racing with his buddies, their route took them straight past the front of the local police precinct. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16588) - you deserved it (2016)
On 05/23/2012 at 5:14pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34747) - you deserved it (6311)
On 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm - intimacy - by blegh (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I sat on the kitchen counter in my boxers for ten minutes running my feet under hot water. Why? Because my dad thought it would be funny to superglue my feet together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24667) - you deserved it (2362)
On 12/12/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by lucas - United States (Alaska)
Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37715) - you deserved it (3809)
On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States
Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23829) - you deserved it (10241)
On 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by unicorn - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was knocked into a wall by a high-pressure water cannon suddenly kicking in. I was only going to the corner store to buy some chocolate. Probably serves me right for not noticing a small riot due to a thumping hangover. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16327) - you deserved it (4497)
Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9054) - you deserved it (47759)
On 05/19/2011 at 1:30am - work - by 613tanner -
Today, someone started an event on Facebook for tomorrow called Kick A Ginger Day. Over 300 people are attending. There are only two redheads in my school, and I'm one of them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38388) - you deserved it (8234)
On 02/22/2011 at 1:30pm - misc - by Someone (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Monday 17 June 2013
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