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vencaliber

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vencaliber

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 8 July 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 307
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

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Visits<b>Sjus</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 5:13am<b>Unionbay47</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 10:54pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 10/05/2013 at 8:38am<b>Blee864</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 10:58pm<b>InfernoVivo</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 1:52am<b>MickyD18</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 12:26am<b>abbeyXD</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 3:35pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 4:59am<b>Taytochill23</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 1:55am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 7:08am<b>BeautyInDiscord</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 2:54pm<b>lionheart822</b> - the 03/06/2013 at 8:54am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 10:53am

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vencaliber's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing with my dog, teasing her, to cheer myself up after being dumped by my girlfriend. My dog bit me hard and I had to go to hospital. The dog has to be put down. FML

#13220648
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31325) - you deserved it (9422)

On 09/27/2010 at 9:17am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was with my girlfriend, thinking we were alone in the house. Her little brother found us having sex on the couch, took a pic and said, "You are now both my slaves." He ran upstairs and locked his bedroom door. FML

#9797503
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17225) - you deserved it (40986)

On 04/11/2010 at 4:11am - intimacy - by junior - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML

#8119072
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19385) - you deserved it (4580)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I called a suicide prevention hotline. No one picked up. FML

#7542505
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62931) - you deserved it (6222)

On 01/24/2010 at 11:12am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was pondering the meaning of life - why I'm here, why anyone is here, why go on, and whether it's worth it... Then it hit me. The football in the head, not the meaning of life. FML

#7529834
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10133) - you deserved it (21586)

On 01/23/2010 at 9:14pm - misc - by ceedee - United States (California)

Today, I was about to propose. I got on my knee in front of my girlfriend and opened the box. My friend thought it would be funny to replace the ring with a condom. FML

#6842155
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43435) - you deserved it (3947)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:14am - love - by Catholicguy (man) - United States (California)

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

#6712676
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11543) - you deserved it (36747)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was DJing for a church event where I was stationed in the middle and everyone was sitting behind me. I walked over to get something to drink and eat and come back with glaring looks. My screensaver had came on with pictures of my naked girlfriend. FML

#6108468
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7254) - you deserved it (45825)

On 11/01/2009 at 8:22pm - misc - by terry (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a bubble bath, and had my iPod touch on the side of my bathtub so I could listen to my music. My dog walked up to the side of the tub, looked me in the eye, and nudged my iPod into the water. FML

#5789992
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12023) - you deserved it (50123)

On 10/12/2009 at 1:36am - animals - by bubbles (woman) - United States

Today, I snuck into my brother's room to scare him. Just as I was about to go for it, his girlfriend calls. I had to sit there motionless listening to my brother having phone sex, then wait for him to go to sleep and sneak back out to pretend it never happened. FML

#3630061
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21569) - you deserved it (55300)

On 07/10/2009 at 1:27am - intimacy - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went through the drive through at Dunkin Donuts and asked for an iced coffee. After no response I start frantically screaming about bad service. After a while, the woman comes out to my car and says, "Please pull up to the speaker." I yelled at a garbage bin for 5 minutes. FML

#3019033
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11602) - you deserved it (110807)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got dressed in what I thought was a really adorable outfit. I had a cute pink skirt on, a white tank top and silver strappy sandal heels. On my way to the mall a car pulls over and this guy asks me how much for three hours. FML

#1259995
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27814) - you deserved it (70300)

On 04/23/2009 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by gabormelchior (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I performed in my school play. Right before my big solo, I noticed a few girls changing backstage and I became aroused. The play was Jesus Christ Superstar, and I was playing Jesus. All I was wearing was a little cloth, so the whole audience saw Jesus get hard during the crucifixion. FML

#981592
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95019) - you deserved it (38918)

On 04/14/2009 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by jizzlemonster13 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

#881347
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38524) - you deserved it (129359)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:03am - work - by tool (man) - United States (Nevada)



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