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uzee

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uzee
  • Town/Country : Plovdiv, Bulgaria
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 March 1992 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 3831
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About uzee : Life is a moment. It's our job to make it seem like it lasts forever

uzee's last visitors

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uzee's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of uzee's badges

uzee's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to work as a home health-aid, and found out that my client turns his hearing aid off on purpose because he can't stand my voice. FML

#17948621
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16367) - you deserved it (3080)

On 10/10/2011 at 12:13am - work - by melikeyturtles - United States

Today, I lent my sister $1000 because she and her husband were in some debt. They used the money to go gambling in Vegas and won a major jackpot. They won't even give me a cut. FML

#17948553
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33181) - you deserved it (5551)

On 10/10/2011 at 12:04am - money - by cc - United States (Montana)

Today, my violent housemate qualified for a gun license. She picks up her bolt-action rifle on Wednesday. FML

#17863556
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21027) - you deserved it (1901)

On 09/29/2011 at 1:36pm - misc - by Help. (woman) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull)

Today, the job search agency that I use asked me to stop sending in my resume, as no one had hired me in three years, and that the situation was unlikely to change. FML

#17862767
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21385) - you deserved it (3020)

On 09/29/2011 at 10:32am - work - by crushed (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML

#17843188
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15835) - you deserved it (25932)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:03pm - health - by Jesus (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my professor snapped and told me that I know nothing, that everything I've ever learned is wrong, and that all of my former teachers should be shot. FML

#17804951
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26031) - you deserved it (4379)

On 09/22/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by failure (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML

#17803016
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32862) - you deserved it (4632)

On 09/22/2011 at 6:31am - love - by nicole - Reserved

Today, the shy girl in my class decided to bring a cake to share with everyone, since it was her birthday. Excited about the cake, I got everybody to sing "happy birthday" for her, only to realize too late that nobody in the class know her name, myself included. FML

#17801637
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10833) - you deserved it (38148)

On 09/22/2011 at 12:44am - misc - by mortenp - United States (Maryland)

Today, I realized just how much my bad sex life has started affecting me, when after not being able to climax from masturbating, I instinctively faked an orgasm. FML

#17786592
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28855) - you deserved it (7851)

On 09/20/2011 at 6:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I surprised my boyfriend by buying him an expensive watch for his birthday. He responded with "Aww, you could've just given me head, babe." FML

#17786349
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26292) - you deserved it (6312)

On 09/20/2011 at 4:25am - intimacy - by Alexandra (woman) - Lebanon

Today, at work, a weird old woman came up to me and told me that it's okay: being ugly isn't a choice, it's nothing to be ashamed of, and that it's what inside that counts. She then hugged me and walked away. FML

#17786304
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26797) - you deserved it (2515)

On 09/20/2011 at 4:08am - misc - by ugly? - United States

Today, I had a violent allergic reaction to some bread I ate at a restaurant. How did they apologize? By sending me a free basket of bread. FML

#17782998
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26191) - you deserved it (2542)

On 09/19/2011 at 8:21pm - health - by Eli (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24028) - you deserved it (6478)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while teaching my high school class about astronomy, I showed them a picture of earth from space. One girl raised her hand, and asked me what the "white things" were. In other words, clouds. FML

#17757259
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22552) - you deserved it (2498)

On 09/16/2011 at 10:42am - kids - by Smart - United States

Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML

#17753266
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29760) - you deserved it (17166)

On 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)



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