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uzee

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uzee
  • Town/Country : Plovdiv, Bulgaria
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 March 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 2263
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About uzee : Life is a moment. It's our job to make it seem like it lasts forever

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uzee's favorite FMLs

Today, my 15-year-old son begged me to pre-order the next season of My Little Pony. FML

#20002664
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15614) - you deserved it (4520)

On 08/04/2012 at 7:04pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got into a debate with my boyfriend over whether or not oral sex was considered sex. I stood firm that it was not. Apparently, he took this as permission, as later that night I walked in on him not having sex with my sister. FML

#19939596
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26370) - you deserved it (27670)

On 07/15/2012 at 1:34am - intimacy - by oops - United States

Today, I had to slowly explain to my boss that in some parts of the world, it's currently winter, due to the different hemispheres. He scoffed, accused me of "making shit up," and said that if I took him for a fool again, I'd be looking for a new job. FML

#19938153
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20417) - you deserved it (1371)

On 07/14/2012 at 6:47pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

#19937636
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3497) - you deserved it (34086)

On 07/14/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)

Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and drink heavily. So far she's kicked me out of the house, tipped over our sofa and thrown her vibrator out the window. FML

#19920264
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18218) - you deserved it (1008)

On 07/10/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by Deadcat101 - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and drink heavily. So far she's kicked me out of the house, tipped over our sofa and thrown her vibrator out the window. FML

#19920264
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18218) - you deserved it (1008)

On 07/10/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by Deadcat101 - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my boyfriend of two years logged into my Facebook account and broke up with himself. He is now receiving loads of sympathy, while I'm being accused of lying about it to save my reputation. FML

#19617909
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20917) - you deserved it (1835)

On 05/13/2012 at 5:26pm - love - by soso (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams to come over for a movie. When I answered the door, my little brother ran up behind me, yelled "geronimo" and pulled down my pants and underwear. FML

#19615713
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22384) - you deserved it (2010)

On 05/13/2012 at 8:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML

#19615151
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6159) - you deserved it (28800)

On 05/13/2012 at 2:26am - work - by fired - United States (Oregon)

Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML

#19613905
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16023) - you deserved it (3062)

On 05/12/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by Andy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend sat me down for a "confession". His confession consisted of him saying that "women are like a bag of chips," and that while you can love the smokey BBQ flavor, every once in a while you just have to go for some salt and vinegar. FML

#19612395
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19557) - you deserved it (1400)

On 05/12/2012 at 4:04pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, my fiancé got drunk at our wedding reception and announced to his and my family what we do in bed. And it was pretty detailed. FML

#19610087
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20902) - you deserved it (2987)

On 05/12/2012 at 1:27am - intimacy - by crazyman. - United States (Texas)

Today, while sitting at a red light, I guiltily nibbled on a chocolate bar and looked around to make sure no one saw me cheating on my diet.  A police car pulled up, I panicked, stepped on the gas, and ran the light. FML

#19609899
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6116) - you deserved it (6543)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:27am - misc - by Snickers (woman) - United States (California)



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