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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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ugh_a_lug

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ugh_a_lug
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 657
  • Number of comments : 89
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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ugh_a_lug's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my professor what happened to the assignment I gave him several weeks ago. Turns out he lost it, and graded me zero as a result. Now if I want a mark, he says I'll have to hand-write it all over again, but that I "probably shouldn't bother," because it was "a bit shit, really." FML

#19011157 (95)

I agree, your life sucks (6726) - you deserved it (500)

On 02/06/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mom died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

#18041933 (190)

I agree, your life sucks (12730) - you deserved it (31644) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML

#17954920 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (18653) - you deserved it (4066)

On 10/10/2011 at 8:58pm - health - by maniac11 - United States (Texas)

Today, my car got acquainted with about 3 dozen eggs. FML

#17924502 (106)

I agree, your life sucks (13579) - you deserved it (1682)

On 10/06/2011 at 11:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom found a new way to get me to clean my room. She piled everything from my floor in front of my wardrobe and padlocked my dresser shut. The best part? She put the key in my room. The worst part? She put over a hundred decoys in there too. FML

#17880889 (204)

I agree, your life sucks (7615) - you deserved it (22068)

On 10/01/2011 at 7:45pm - misc - by Kazuya - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

#17843744 (306)

I agree, your life sucks (8765) - you deserved it (19932)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

#17483730 (283)

I agree, your life sucks (11694) - you deserved it (1015)

On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States

Today, my religious parents were hosting a family dinner. Not only did we have to wait over an hour for my grandma to finally show up, but when she did, she had her 30 year old boytoy in tow. Apparently, "Granny has needs too you know, hahaha!" Goodbye peaceful family. FML

#17471582 (208)

I agree, your life sucks (8097) - you deserved it (844)

On 08/14/2011 at 4:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, while out shopping, I noticed a seedy bum kept following a girl around the store. Trying to be a good samaritan, I trailed them into the street. The bum jogged up behind her and looked like he was about to grab her, so I ran up and tackled him to the ground. Turns out he was her father. FML

#17471186 (94)

I agree, your life sucks (16603) - you deserved it (8683)

On 08/14/2011 at 3:31pm - misc - by fuck (man) - United States (Arizona)

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559 (409)

I agree, your life sucks (26029) - you deserved it (22963)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I got a call from my five-year-old son's principal, my son had pooped in the school yard then gave the teacher a ziploc bag and commanded her to pick it up. He said he was trying to imitate our dog. FML

#15328400 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (28737) - you deserved it (4223)

On 03/15/2011 at 10:05pm - kids - by anonymous -

Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML

#14058038 (193)

I agree, your life sucks (49473) - you deserved it (3491)

On 12/02/2010 at 8:20am - love - by mrdentist -

Today, I woke up to a man stroking my leg while smelling my hair. I asked my roommate who he was and she said, "Oh, that's just my brother. He needs a place to stay and he will be living with us until June. Didn't I tell you that?" No, you didn't. FML

#13948319 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (23526) - you deserved it (1657)

On 11/23/2010 at 10:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML

#13930948 (213)

I agree, your life sucks (24498) - you deserved it (3131)

On 11/21/2010 at 10:42pm - animals - by dickwebs - Germany

Today, I woke up to find my new roommate staring straight at me. She then went on to say, "I love how you sleep," and continued to stare. I live in a residence off campus and I've already changed roommates twice this year. I'm stuck with a person who stares at me sleep for the next two years. FML

#13789372 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (20198) - you deserved it (2377)

On 11/10/2010 at 11:32am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Argentina (Cordoba)