Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

travelbitch

Search for a member

travelbitch

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 8 June 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 359
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About travelbitch : I'm a 19 year old girl who live in Amsterdam. I love to read FML when I'm bored or I have to wait a while. I also have the FML-app on my Blackberry loveit!

travelbitch's page activity

Visits<b>Neukmijnleven</b> - the 02/11/2012 at 11:15am

travelbitch's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of travelbitch's badges

travelbitch's favorite FMLs

Today, I got stood up on a date for three hours. I would have left much earlier but the whole time she had reassured me that she was on her way. And then I saw her tweeting about the pizza rolls she was making at home. FML

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34397) - you deserved it (24570)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34397) - you deserved it (24570)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a woman came into my work and yelled at me because no one told her the cake she had bought the week before was made of ice cream. She'd hidden it in the cupboard and it melted. I work in Dairy Queen. FML

#17940087
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29658) - you deserved it (2178)

On 10/09/2011 at 1:11am - work - by ab (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML

#17939452
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26123) - you deserved it (6104)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:53pm - kids - by hairless - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my sister asked me to explain where to put a tampon. I realized near the end of the conversation that she believed the urine, feces, and blood all came from the same orifice. This began a long discussion during which I was forced to tell her not to put the tampon in her rectum. FML

#17933094
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29281) - you deserved it (2433)

On 10/08/2011 at 2:48am - health - by ohgawd (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was walking down the street on my way to work, when an old lady's walking stick caught my leg and sent me crashing to the ground. She apologised for the accident and watched me stumble to my feet. I said not to worry. Just as I turned to leave, I could swear a smirk crept over her face. FML

#17930849
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23934) - you deserved it (2964)

On 10/07/2011 at 9:23pm - work - by Lucas79 - Australia

Today, my future mother-in-law gave me advice on life. One piece of advice was that I should leave her son. FML

#17925802
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26346) - you deserved it (2272)

On 10/07/2011 at 2:41am - love - by andy1r (woman) - Bolivia (El Beni)

Today, my car got acquainted with about 3 dozen eggs. FML

#17924502
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21348) - you deserved it (2866)

On 10/06/2011 at 11:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was suspended from work. Some lady went to the manager and told them that I was stalking her, all because I would kindly greet her everyday at the grocery store. I'm the cashier. FML

#17921774
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24399) - you deserved it (1779)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:28pm - work - by hazlanz216 - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my new coworker asked if I knew her daughter. I responded yes and asked how her pregnancy was going. She didn't know her daughter was pregnant. FML

#17920889
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38625) - you deserved it (6142)

On 10/06/2011 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML

#17918241
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19781) - you deserved it (9975)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by xoccerplaya - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML

Today, my friends learned that if you play "connect the dots" with the pimples on my back the resulting picture is a large penis. FML

#17910918
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30160) - you deserved it (4815)

On 10/05/2011 at 12:08pm - misc - by Hoggiebear - United States (Georgia)

Today, I drove to the liquor store completely naked except for my dressing gown, with a carload of idiot stoners who ran in and stole vodka, tequila and whiskey. We drank in a bush. Last week I was a good citizen, and now I'm white trash. I'm not quite sure what happened in between. FML

#17908235
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7361) - you deserved it (57388)

On 10/04/2011 at 11:28pm - misc - by danii - Reserved



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: