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thisguy22's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 04/25/2015 at 3:57am / United States (Montana) / Love
Today, my little sister filled the huge house I spent over a week building in Minecraft with TNT. She then demanded I give her all the money in my wallet, or she'd blow it all up. She's now $86.25 richer, and my parents think it's too hilarious to make her give me my money back. FML
by Anonymous / 04/24/2015 at 11:23pm / United States / Money
Today, my religious girlfriend convinced me to let her take my virginity. A few hours later, she broke up with me, crying and saying I was going to hell for having sex before marriage. But apparently she isn't, and she can't be with someone who "tempts" her. FML
by Anonymous / 04/22/2015 at 10:24am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/22/2015 at 10:14am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
by transcendingnerd / 04/13/2015 at 6:46am / Philippines (Manila) / Kids
by Crappy / 04/11/2015 at 8:12am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
Today, a guy tried to carjack me. Good news: I drive a stick shift, and the idiot apparently couldn't, so I still have my car. Bad news: he was so angry, he beat the shit out of me. I had to get stitches, and now I look like I went on a date with Chris Brown. FML
by Anonymous / 04/10/2015 at 2:04pm / United States (Florida) / Health
by Anonymous / 04/08/2015 at 1:19pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by noantiquesforme / 03/30/2015 at 2:39pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by comfort_ / 03/26/2015 at 11:28pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I made a speech in front of my entire graduating class and their families, despite my fear of public speaking. It seemed to go well and I got a big round of applause at the end. Then I panicked and instead of waving, I lifted my arm straight out in a Hitler salute. FML
by oooooops / 03/22/2015 at 8:32pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to bail my drunk dad out of jail after he beat the shit out of a mime artist. All he had to say on the matter was "Fucking bastard was playing mind games." and that he'd beat him up again if he could. FML
by Anonymous / 03/19/2015 at 1:01am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML
by mafille / 03/18/2015 at 11:22pm / France / Kids
by brokeforever / 03/18/2015 at 6:23pm / Latvia (Riga) / Animals
- 1Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 2Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 3Today, I'm still reeling over the unexpected loss of my co-worker. I also received a notification…