thisguy22

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thisguy22

22Fucked!

thisguy22thisguy22
  • Town/Country : Chicago, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 February 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12474
  • Number of comments : 362
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About thisguy22 : Thnks fr th mmrs.

thisguy22's page activity

Visits<b>16416</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 8:18pm<b>Mr_Satan</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 7:03pm<b>French_giirl</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 1:07pm<b>Vokul_Kulaas</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 11:59pm<b>glencoco63</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 4:48pm<b>OlRed</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 6:01pm<b>royr7395</b> - the 08/13/2016 at 12:43am<b>NotSoMuchAnAngel</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 10:55pm<b>stingray112</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 9:03pm<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 6:05pm<b>chrisbeaudoin</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 7:04pm<b>LyonDetreny</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 3:16am<b>Lesbiantrash</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 10:49pm<b>ImKimitheEmo</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 6:33pm<b>CrazyCatLady18</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 1:52pm<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 2:27am<b>Vitani_Verci</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 3:07pm<b>2simz</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 3:35am

Fucked!<b>OlRed</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 12:04am<b>NotSoMuchAnAngel</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 3:57am<b>ImKimitheEmo</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 6:54pm<b>NotADude</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 9:36pm<b>andrmac</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 9:58am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 10:50pm<b>Thoricsteam20</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 4:55pm<b>trucker2</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 9:25pm<b>interesting33</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 2:54pm<b>RavingHaven</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 9:02am<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 2:16pm<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 12:35am<b>grandtheftautumn</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 6:21pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 4:54pm<b>Jflowers9296</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 6:40pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 8:25pm<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 4:46pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 4:24am

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thisguy22's favorite FMLs

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, I was supervising some kids, who were playing on a bouncy castle. One of them managed to kick me in the face during a jump, and looking for an apology, I asked, "What do you say?" He paused, then shouted, "HEADSHOTTTTT!" FML

by xx-look-at-xx / 04/12/2013 at 8:14pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Kids

Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2013 at 4:21pm / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2013 at 11:42am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2013 at 12:28am / United States / Intimacy

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm / United States / Health

Today, I was yelled at while I was shopping by some lady, because she saw my tattoo on my arm. She screamed that I'm the "spawn of Satan" and told me I'm going to hell. It's a fake tattoo of Mickey mouse. FML

by MickyIsEVIL / 04/09/2013 at 7:05am / Japan (Aichi) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my 17th birthday, and the first birthday since my mother died, leaving me to live with my previously-absent father. He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer, and said, "Happy birthday, fuckstick". One more year. FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 12:59am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, while walking to my car after work, I witnessed some moron who was texting while riding her bike running right into my parked car, resulting in a broken side mirror, a damaged windshield, two dents, and for her, a broken phone and nose. She's threatening to sue me for damages. FML

by Anon / 04/08/2013 at 6:04pm / United States (Ohio) / Transportation

Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML

by The_Black_Jesus / 03/31/2013 at 9:32am / United States / Kids

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

by fuck you dad / 03/30/2013 at 2:17pm / Ireland (Monaghan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on the toilet, when I noticed I could see my daughter dancing in the other room in the mirror, so I took a picture with my phone. After I uploaded it, people pointed out that I was visible in the picture, sitting on the toilet and smiling. FML

by crunknasty / 03/30/2013 at 1:19am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML

by fucked by sex ed / 03/29/2013 at 1:18pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2013 at 9:13pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I almost lost my virginity at the age of 34. After years of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am. FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 12:54pm / United States / Intimacy