theboldshadow

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Offline (the 09/10/2014 at 6:22am)

theboldshadow

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1636
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About theboldshadow : Drummer, art enthusiast, music-obsessed, tool fan, avid thinker

theboldshadow's page activity

Visits<b>kafka779</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 11:29pm<b>shupwhup</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 9:21pm<b>BadTat</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 10:11pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 6:16pm<b>Cocoapelli</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 5:43pm<b>kionna_d</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 7:14pm<b>gradius1002</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 7:41am<b>GoatInABag</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 10:08pm<b>michaelbishop99</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 11:13pm<b>dmd316</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 2:27am<b>tsent8</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 4:35pm<b>canadianKeari</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 12:31am<b>Captain_Brittain</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 10:04am<b>ianlittle2000</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 8:49pm<b>Rori</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 9:45am<b>27BronxBombers</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 11:25am<b>toothpsate</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 7:44am<b>velociraptor_123</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 5:54pm

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theboldshadow's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my regular pharmacist of three months, and since I've always seen him on a crutch, I asked him how his leg was. His response: "Still missing". FML

by sozzy / 07/07/2012 at 3:26am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

by habbsrule / 06/15/2012 at 10:21am / Canada / Kids

Today, I found out that my wife and two teenage daughters' periods are all one week after the other. I am living in hell almost every single day. FML

by anonymous / 06/14/2012 at 10:54am / China (Jiangsu) / Health

Today, my psychiatrist asked me if I felt bad about my weight. When I said no, he looked surprised and said, "Why not?" FML

by ouch / 06/14/2012 at 7:26am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, after a surprise candlelit dinner and a two bottles of wine for my birthday, my boyfriend and I decided to take a sexy shower together. It ended with us both drunk, naked, and crying, wedged into a small tub together, talking about our dead pets. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2012 at 1:46am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML

by N / 05/07/2012 at 5:51am / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my favorite song since I was a small child is actually about anal sex and delaying an orgasm. FML

by Anonymoosey / 02/19/2012 at 6:47pm / Canada / Intimacy

Today, I came home from out of state. I found out someone online had told my husband that the "fumes" from hot showers can be lethal. As a precaution, he removed the draft-blocking bathroom door to make sure it's "properly ventilated." FML

by marriedtoaretard / 02/19/2012 at 5:45pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend openly mocked me, calling me an idiot for thinking seahorses are real. She insists that they're like unicorns, and only exist in fiction. FML

by BoringFucker / 02/06/2012 at 4:52pm / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Animals

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

by ugh / 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, at school, I was crying because someone I knew had died. My teacher pulled me aside and said, "I understand you're socially awkward, but don't worry it gets better." FML

by Anonymous / 01/26/2012 at 6:53am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

by blegh / 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, I got my braces off. I also got my tongue pierced. Both by my orthodontist. FML

by OUCH. / 11/17/2011 at 4:27pm / United States / Health

Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML

by Chubby / 11/17/2011 at 11:50am / United States / Work