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Offline (the 09/10/2014 at 6:22am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2025
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About theboldshadow : Drummer, art enthusiast, music-obsessed, tool fan, avid thinker

theboldshadow's page activity

Visits<b>kafka779</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 11:29pm<b>shupwhup</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 9:21pm<b>BadTat</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 10:11pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 6:16pm<b>Cocoapelli</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 5:43pm<b>kionna_d</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 7:14pm<b>gradius1002</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 7:41am<b>GoatInABag</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 10:08pm<b>michaelbishop99</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 11:13pm<b>dmd316</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 2:27am<b>tsent8</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 4:35pm<b>canadianKeari</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 12:31am<b>Captain_Brittain</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 10:04am<b>ianlittle2000</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 8:49pm<b>Rori</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 9:45am<b>27BronxBombers</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 11:25am<b>toothpsate</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 7:44am<b>velociraptor_123</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 5:54pm

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theboldshadow's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband injured his back badly. He's taken three percocets, because according to him, he knows the dosage better than his doctor, and is demanding that I let him drive himself to work, with no pants on. FML

by jkim / 09/08/2014 at 1:56pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, my girlfriend yelled at me for jokingly telling her to get back in the kitchen. After we finally made peace and I told her that I fully respect women, I turned on my stereo. The song's first words? "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." Cue second argument. FML

by Anonymous / 09/05/2014 at 5:54pm / United States (Arkansas) / Love

Today, my crazy bitch of a boss fired me for inappropriate conduct. Apparently my "fake Nazi accent" is "offensive to our Jewish coworkers." I'm German. I have no way to change the way I speak, or to pay this month's bills. FML

by Screwed / 11/08/2012 at 11:02pm / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, while at my job as a hairdresser, I was giving an elderly client a perm and I thought she'd fallen asleep. She'd died. FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2012 at 1:49am / United States / Work

Today, I chaperoned a school dance. A song I knew came on, and, wanting to be the fun teacher, I danced around a little. The students then pointed and laughed. I graduated in '87 and high school still hurts. FML

by highschoolsucks / 10/04/2012 at 10:44pm / United States / Work

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend doggy-style. I was getting close when he suddenly blurts out, "Babe, you really need to bleach your asshole." FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2012 at 7:02pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2012 at 12:37am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to spank the ferret in bed and spray me while singing the Spiderman theme song. FML

by BabyG2222 / 09/29/2012 at 5:14am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML

by Anonymous / 08/25/2012 at 8:47am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend again accused me of cheating on him. This time, it was because I delayed replying to his text message so I could feed my pet. Apparently I'm fucking my pet toad now. Jesus. FML

by youre dumped shitforbrain / 08/19/2012 at 12:52pm / Sweden (Sodermanlands Lan) / Love

Today, I woke up by inhaling a fly up my nose, and feeling it twitching and slowly dying inside my nasal cavity. FML

by sneaky1324 / 08/18/2012 at 3:49am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2012 at 1:15am / United States / Health

Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML

by Just_Me_88 / 08/18/2012 at 1:09am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML

by diggingaplotforone / 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, I was forced to nod and smile as a pregnant, fifteen-year-old, brain-dead Jersey Shore wannabe cussed me out for being rude by using words from a "foreign language" during our conversation. I used the word "pretentious." FML

by mikeissad / 08/11/2012 at 3:37pm / United States (Florida) / Work