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Offline (the 10/21/2016 at 5:59am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 29 December 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 15465
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About thatotk : You better not pout. You better not cry. You better not shout, I'm telling you why. If you make a sound, you.. will die.

thatotk's page activity

Visits<b>TheAspieDork</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 11:49pm<b>Hann0rslovsu</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 9:29am<b>fhlakd</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 11:26am<b>rosha267</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 11:43pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 2:16pm<b>Space_Teddy</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 6:16pm<b>lulumars</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 9:14pm<b>Sudoc</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 4:46pm<b>chrisjw27</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 11:50am<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 2:25pm<b>JuzReading</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 5:35am<b>lirideout</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 3:28am<b>RandEm2497</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 1:48am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 8:59am<b>jen1682</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 3:20pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 10:00pm<b>its_bree</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 5:19am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 6:37pm

Fucked!<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 4:05pm

thatotk's FML badges

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thatotk's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my boyfriend the exact moment I fell in love with him: when we made eye contact in a crowd on our fifth date. He asked if I wanted to know what he was thinking at that moment. I then found out it was, "I really hope she can't smell that fart." FML

by saashtow / 10/07/2016 at 1:00am / United States (Georgia) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I finally got the courage to ask my boss why the flowers I got her for her birthday the other day were in the conference room and not her office. She told me she was allergic to them and she had such a bad reaction that it made her go home early. I made my boss sick on her birthday. FML

by onlyolivia / 10/05/2016 at 10:43am / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, my coworker and I agreed to come clean and tell our fellow employees that we have been secretly dating for a while. Before we could, I received a promotion. I am now his boss. FML

by Da Boss / 10/04/2016 at 9:19pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I was with my boyfriend. He got up, shut the blinds and turned around to say, "I don't usually shut the blinds, but no one can see this." Assuming we were going to have sex, I took my pants off. He asked me what I was doing, then sat down to eat an entire tub of ice cream. FML

by anonymous / 10/01/2016 at 5:00am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my brand new $3,000 mattress that is supposed to relieve my back pain works amazingly. I only discovered this because my wife, son, daughter, dog, and two cats are all asleep on it and not waking up. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2016 at 1:53am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, my boyfriend and I wanted to kayak. On the way, I told him I had to go back to our hotel because I needed the bathroom and didn't want a public one to smell. Once back in the elevator at the hotel, it got stuck. For an hour. I pooped myself and had to wait 40 minutes after that for help. FML

by ItWasOurAnniversary / 09/28/2016 at 8:08am / Australia / Health

Today, I was showing my crush/co-worker how to operate a particular piece of machinery. She exclaimed out loud, "Oh! This knob pulls out," then mumbled under her breath, "unlike my boyfriend." FML

by nicetoknow / 09/26/2016 at 8:57am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I learned that the burning sensation I get on my balls isn't from when my girlfriend poured hot sauce on my balls as a prank, it's actually gonorrhea. FML

by Battlebarney / 09/22/2016 at 6:58am / United States (District of Columbia) / Health

Today, I tried to sneakily leave my boyfriend's house at 3 a.m. without his parents knowing. I had a flat tire. FML

by nekal / 09/21/2016 at 12:50pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, I visited my Aunt in hospital. Another patient got jealous, so she threw a tantrum. She threw things at us, pulled her drip out, threw herself to the floor, screamed, pounded the floor with her fists and pissed herself. My aunt is still waiting for a new room, and the staff blame me. FML

by ANON / 09/21/2016 at 10:09am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health

Today, my fiancé, my two-year-old, and my dog are all sleeping peacefully next to me in our new king-sized memory foam bed. It's 2:15 in the morning. Why am I not sleeping? Because they all snore, one right after the other. It's like an endless song of snoring. FML

by Alyssa / 09/21/2016 at 3:17am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally had sex with the man with whom I've been in love for months. Too bad I was too drunk to remember a thing. FML

by tequilashot / 09/20/2016 at 12:40am / Brazil (Rio Grande do Sul) / Love

Today, I found out what happens when you sleep with a girl your chemistry major friend likes. He put silver nitrate in my body wash and shampoo. I look like I survived an explosion in a Sharpie factory. He says it'll come off "in a few days". FML

by dude i am so sorry / 09/19/2016 at 3:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, my wife announced she had a sexy surprise for me. Turns out she got a Brazilian wax, which is a huge turn-off for me. Not only could I not get it up, I got to hear all about how much her last boyfriend loved it. FML.

by HairToStay / 09/19/2016 at 12:04pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, because of the gas crisis in my state, we had to stop taking delivers at the pizza place I work at. Someone asked if we could walk it to them. My manager agreed. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2016 at 10:03am / United States / Work