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tessa1110001

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tessa1110001

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 3 November 1991 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3126
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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tessa1110001's page activity

Visits<b>MeCoCo</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 9:13pm<b>apaleontologist</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 5:29pm<b>FuhrerBurg</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 3:32pm<b>arebeewhy</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 12:08pm<b>CheeseTron</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 9:53pm

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tessa1110001's favorite FMLs

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend I went into his shower to freshen up. Where I saw an open bottle of pubic lice shampoo. FML

#658830
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (113825) - you deserved it (12566)

On 03/28/2009 at 9:34am - intimacy - by lice (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while lying in bed with my girlfriend and she was grabbing the fat on my stomach I said to her "stop touching my fat". She replied "so don't touch you at all?" FML

#656486
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49870) - you deserved it (22812)

On 03/28/2009 at 1:43am - misc - by justinherass (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I slept over at my friend's house but forgot my glasses. When I woke up in the morning, I came out of his room and forcefully kicked what I thought was a soccer ball on the floor. Turns out it was his miniature poodle - it fell down a long flight of stairs. FML

#459087
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28211) - you deserved it (104115)

On 03/19/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by JohnMackSquirts (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was filling out paperwork with my new doctor. During the questionnaire, she asked if I was sexually active. I said yes. She then asked, "What do you do?" I told her I normally did vaginal, but sometimes anal. She blushed and started to laugh. She was asking where I worked. FML

Today, I gave myself a facial with one of those masks you leave on for a while. I busied myself by tidying my room while it dried and eventually forgot all about it. I finally remembered about it after I answered the door to the postman. Not embarassing enough? I'm a guy. FML

#318260
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25309) - you deserved it (60326)

On 03/14/2009 at 7:36am - misc - by skc (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I fell asleep in the car on a 10+ hour trip with my family as soon as we got on the highway. When I woke up an hour later, I realized I'd had a wet dream. I had to sit next to my grandma with semen all over my thighs and boxers for the rest of the trip. FML

#278978
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72344) - you deserved it (10245)

On 03/11/2009 at 8:30pm - misc - by MoneyMike (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my mother told me she needed a urine sample to send in to the doctors to test for any allergies. I did what she had asked and went to my room. I came down stairs later and found her in the bathroom putting my pee on a pregnancy test stick. FML

#253900
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79094) - you deserved it (7737)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:54pm - misc - by missy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my name was called during an assembly because I won some sort of prize. Everyone booed. FML

#232169
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67190) - you deserved it (6035)

On 03/07/2009 at 2:01am - misc - by ladeda (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to the ER for severe pain in my abdominal area. The doctor comes in after looking at the CT scan and says, "Well it's not your appendix." Thinking I'm in the clear I say, "That's Awesome", the doctor then responded with "It's probably your testicles." FML

Today, I was at this awesome party and I was dancing with this really attractive girl who started making out with me all of a sudden. Five minutes later, my friend told me that the girl had just given him a blowjob. FML

#225509
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61442) - you deserved it (10265)

On 03/06/2009 at 11:14am - intimacy - by cumguzzler - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was in the change room at the local YMCA. I went to use the hair dryer but couldn't because a naked old man was bent over, butt cheeks spread wide with his hands, and ass aimed at the dryer. He seemed to be enjoying it. FML

#216994
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52048) - you deserved it (3013)

On 03/05/2009 at 1:45pm - misc - by nuberific (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was on my way home from a friends house. I called home ahead of time to let my parents know. My dad picked up and in a panting voice said, "Now isn't a good time, drive around the block for 15 minutes." FML

#194766
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (94638) - you deserved it (5771)

On 03/03/2009 at 11:20am - intimacy - by hlev24 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mother was re-enrolling me in school so she was required to fill out some paper work. Later, she asks me, "What does Caucasian mean?". I ask, "Why?". Apparently she didn't recognize the word so she checked "other" and wrote in "white". FML

#192383
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46036) - you deserved it (4883)

On 03/03/2009 at 12:37am - misc - by buryuntime (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I came home to find that my room had been ransacked. My mom comes out of no where and says that we need to have a talk. I freaked out thinking it was all the empty alcohol bottles under my bed. My mom holds up the birth control and says "I always knew you were a whore." FML

#185042
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62052) - you deserved it (17059)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:03pm - misc - by Stairway2Heaven - Canada (British Columbia)



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