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tessa1110001

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tessa1110001

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 3 November 1991 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3309
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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tessa1110001's page activity

Visits<b>MeCoCo</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 9:13pm<b>apaleontologist</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 5:29pm<b>FuhrerBurg</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 3:32pm<b>arebeewhy</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 12:08pm<b>CheeseTron</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 9:53pm

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tessa1110001's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the water park, and got in a line on a staircase to get on a waterslide. A couple minutes in, I feel a large amount of warm liquid drip on my head. Seconds later, a crying girl was being lead down the stairs being told that 'everyone wets themselves sometimes'. FML

#3681487
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51114) - you deserved it (2260)

On 07/12/2009 at 12:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, it was my wedding day. I had my butt clenched during the ceremony. I was giving my husband the ring, but dropped it. When I went to retrieve it, I let a huge one ripe. My husband yelled "she likes to eat beans." FML

#3666100
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55119) - you deserved it (9494)

On 07/11/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by 1234 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in the car with my mom and dad. My mom turned around and asked, "Have you had sex yet?" I said no, which is true. My dad cracked up and said, "Told you so!" My mom frowned, took out her wallet, and handed him $20. My parents bet on my nonexistent sex life. FML

#3602722
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59502) - you deserved it (4421)

On 07/09/2009 at 2:33am - intimacy - by Told_You_So (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I came home and found out that my new roommate, who smokes half a pack of cigarettes a day and drinks heavily 5 nights a week, had smashed my $300 bong because "weed is a horrible and deadly drug that will kill you slowly." FML

Today, the dentist sneezed in my mouth. FML

#3386815
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (97852) - you deserved it (5544)

On 07/01/2009 at 2:33am - misc - by kewlio45 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I finally got the courage to tell my parents that I'm gay. My mom said "Yeah, we know." When I asked how they knew, my dad, without looking up from the tv, said, "We've been monitoring your Internet history." FML

#3330800
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44284) - you deserved it (15328)

On 06/29/2009 at 1:41am - misc - by Asterisk1009 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was awoken by my son squirting liquid on me from a bottle. We have a high deer population in our area, so I spray urine contained in black bottle on my plants to help deter the deer from eating them. I also water my flowers with water from a blue bottle. My son used the black one. FML

#3200106
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32295) - you deserved it (7371)

On 06/25/2009 at 6:17am - misc - by GoldenShower (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was riding on the back of my dad's motorcycle. After a few minutes, the vibrations from the engine became way too much for me and I couldn't control myself. I had such an intense orgasm, sitting right behind my father, with my arms around his waist. FML

#3192725
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83109) - you deserved it (14200)

On 06/25/2009 at 12:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I saw myself in a 'girls gone wild' ad with another girl. So did my mom. FML

#2987164
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24514) - you deserved it (109909)

On 06/18/2009 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my daughter asked me if we can make sticker art. Of course I said it was ok so she went to get some stickers. I wondered where she was going when she walked into the bathroom, but I didn't ask. I left the room and when I came back, her paper was blank and my pads were stuck to the wall. FML

#2935296
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35084) - you deserved it (5351)

On 06/16/2009 at 6:35am - kids - by inboxbuddies (woman) - Saudi Arabia (Ash Sharqiyah)

Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML

#2925389
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80711) - you deserved it (5542)

On 06/15/2009 at 10:13pm - misc - by Shaun (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was about to go and take a shower when I saw a pair of scissors taped to the door at eye level with a note from my boyfriend saying "Time to trim that hairy thang down under." FML

#2797369
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31498) - you deserved it (51466)

On 06/11/2009 at 9:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was camping. Me and this really cute girl were hitting it off real nice. It was the last night so we both headed over to my tent to have sex. I was just about to get it in when a raccoon ripped my tent causing the girl to scream and runaway. I got cockblocked by a raccoon. FML

#2729024
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70099) - you deserved it (8419)

On 06/08/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by Baggabbles123 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was reading through a local wedding mag's advice page. A mother-in-law to be was writing about how to handle wanting her son to break off his engagement. I thought, "Wow. That must suck. I'm glad I like my mother-in-law to be." And then I saw her name. FML

#2593216
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67571) - you deserved it (2945)

On 06/04/2009 at 7:11am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML

#2534485
391 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61774) - you deserved it (5612)

On 06/02/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Higgs (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)



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