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tessa1110001

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tessa1110001

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tessa1110001
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 November 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4250
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About tessa1110001 : Cause I may be bad but I'm perfectly good at it. Sex in the air, I don't care, I love the smell of it 💋

tessa1110001's page activity

Visits<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 9:42am<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 4:12pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 10:35pm<b>djurmel89</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 1:56pm<b>briang959</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 1:27pm<b>MeCoCo</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 9:13pm<b>apaleontologist</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 5:29pm<b>FuhrerBurg</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 3:32pm<b>arebeewhy</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 12:08pm<b>CheeseTron</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 9:53pm

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tessa1110001's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my teenage daughter to read off directions from my iPhone while I drove. She went on Instagram instead. We missed the turn by 32 miles. FML

#19929882
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29487) - you deserved it (6423)

On 07/12/2012 at 8:52pm - kids - by lostforlife - United States (Maine)

Today, my boss asked me if he could pay me in gum. Thinking he was playing around, I agreed. He wasn't playing around. FML

#19921973
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23590) - you deserved it (9190)

On 07/11/2012 at 1:29am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother was playing with the pepper spray on my key chain. He didn't think it was real, so to test it he sprayed me in the mouth while I was asleep. FML

Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and drink heavily. So far she's kicked me out of the house, tipped over our sofa and thrown her vibrator out the window. FML

#19920264
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26158) - you deserved it (1698)

On 07/10/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by Deadcat101 - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I heard a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband, naked and with his pants around his ankles, standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body, I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML

#19919285
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29264) - you deserved it (3238)

On 07/10/2012 at 3:33pm - misc - by I_Has_A_Fishy - United States (Texas)

Today, I was sitting in my car waiting my shift to start. I must've fallen asleep because I woke up to a call from my boss firing me. I was in the parking lot. FML

#19915541
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10821) - you deserved it (21446)

On 07/09/2012 at 5:26pm - work - by idiot - United States

Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML

#19903031
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66985) - you deserved it (5514)

On 07/07/2012 at 12:45am - health - by Dammit - United States (California)

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

#19902817
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11452) - you deserved it (25902)

On 07/07/2012 at 12:08am - misc - by totallyembarassed - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I picked up my car from the repair shop, drove two miles, and ran out of gas. I then walked to get gas, put a gallon of gas in the car, and tried to start it. The battery was too weak to start the car, and died on the spot. FML

#19896001
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25372) - you deserved it (2447)

On 07/05/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by 303 - United States (Texas)

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a diet coke?" FML

#19895683
348 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39562) - you deserved it (9511)

On 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my brother thought it would be funny to pretend my tampons were "dynamite" and run around the house throwing them at my friends and family. FML

#19893089
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21501) - you deserved it (2229)

On 07/05/2012 at 12:01am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went for a jog. I was 5 km away from home when I had a sudden urge to poop. I didn't want to use the bushes, so I thought I could hold it in. I was wrong. FML

#19890134
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24311) - you deserved it (5447)

On 07/04/2012 at 9:48am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that my wife actually encourages my three year-old son to sleep in our bed, as a buffer against any romantic advances. FML

#19887553
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34932) - you deserved it (3358)

On 07/03/2012 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out my home health patient purposely drinks tons of prune juice every night so I will have a huge mess to clean up in the morning because I'm "a lazy bastard" and I "need to work harder." FML

#19885470
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23198) - you deserved it (2403)

On 07/03/2012 at 11:08am - work - by melikeyturtles - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was having an argument with my girlfriend in front of our friends. I didn't want her to spoil my good time, so I ignored her until she disappeared. She re-appeared thirty minutes later just to throw a punch that would make Muhammad Ali jealous. Our friends' reaction? They clapped. FML

#19884925
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8714) - you deserved it (42251)

On 07/03/2012 at 7:51am - misc - by ali (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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