Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About tessa1110001 : Cause I may be bad but I'm perfectly good at it. Sex in the air, I don't care, I love the smell of it 💋
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Today, I heard a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband, naked and with his pants around his ankles, standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body, I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML
Today, I picked up my car from the repair shop, drove two miles, and ran out of gas. I then walked to get gas, put a gallon of gas in the car, and tried to start it. The battery was too weak to start the car, and died on the spot. FML
Today, I found out my home health patient purposely drinks tons of prune juice every night so I will have a huge mess to clean up in the morning because I'm "a lazy bastard" and I "need to work harder." FML
Today, I was having an argument with my girlfriend in front of our friends. I didn't want her to spoil my good time, so I ignored her until she disappeared. She re-appeared thirty minutes later just to throw a punch that would make Muhammad Ali jealous. Our friends' reaction? They clapped. FML
Friday 28 August 2015