teresa96706

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Offline (the 11/28/2016 at 6:32pm)

teresa96706

14Fucked!

teresa96706teresa96706
  • Town/Country : Wahiawa, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 June 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 14854
  • Number of comments : 189
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 29 posted

About teresa96706 : |Friendly|
|Island Girl|
|University life|
|in a relationship|
|loves the aina (land)|

teresa96706's page activity

Visits<b>Diamond_don</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 11:27pm<b>madysloth</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 8:51pm<b>grunt2423</b> - the 06/29/2016 at 1:36am<b>jtorgey84</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 1:49am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 9:26pm<b>phantomxbg</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 8:31pm<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 8:26pm<b>completerubbish</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 11:07am<b>DaviSal00</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 7:31pm<b>Exaspera</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 3:06am<b>roman11</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 4:21am<b>the_real_dvd</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 8:09pm<b>patwo8</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 5:20pm<b>FigureSkater7713</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 11:45pm<b>WJM505</b> - the 03/25/2016 at 10:56pm<b>lexipodamus</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 12:26pm<b>Perinsond</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 5:39am<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 6:00am

Fucked!<b>jtorgey84</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 7:49am<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 2:26am<b>austinbaa</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 6:41am<b>kyle_s_97</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 3:26pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 12:48pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 1:00am<b>siham_andalous</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 12:14am<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 5:10am<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 7:50am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 4:19am<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 6:35am<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 6:03pm<b>whereismyb4con</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 9:17am<b>BlueDragonDC</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 12:05am

teresa96706's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of teresa96706's badges

teresa96706's favorite FMLs

Today, I spent an hour in my car terrified to go inside because I thought my house was being burgled. I saw rapid shadows in the light of my lounge. Eventually I plucked up the courage to creep inside with a rock to find it wasn't a robber. It was my cats, fighting in front of a toppled lamp. FML

by amazinghermit / 11/24/2014 at 11:21pm / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Animals

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

by notsofriendly / 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my boyfriend kept jiggling my fat rolls while we were cuddling. I was annoyed, and I told him he could at least go for my boobs instead. He instantly replied, "But these are bigger..." FML

by Anonymous / 11/06/2014 at 12:14pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I managed to convince my sister that when you press down the diet button on the lid of a McDonald's cup it turns whatever is in there diet. I pressed the button and she started shouting how she hates diet drinks. She's 19. FML

by aineroo / 11/05/2014 at 4:25pm / Ireland (Galway) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

by whoops / 08/01/2014 at 4:45pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML

by MiserableMan / 06/10/2014 at 12:02am / Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh) / Love

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

by great 1st impression / 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend admitted to my best friend that she basically just sees me as a dildo with annoying emotions. FML

by taintedlover / 05/13/2014 at 5:31pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

by STOP / 05/08/2014 at 9:55am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my art teacher showed off a painting of his name he got in Japan. I can read Japanese, and it actually says "Old idiot". I really don't want to break it to him. FML

by Sam / 05/04/2014 at 2:12am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I once again had another guy's sweaty crotch pushed into my face. I still don't see why I enjoy wrestling. FML

Today, I found out the reason our toilet paper has been disappearing so fast recently isn't because my son is wanking like a gibbon as I first thought. He's just been using our shredder to make streamers out of the stuff, then hiding it all in a box in his closet. Fucking hell, son. FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2014 at 10:04am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, while at a restaurant with my husband for our 4-year anniversary, he kept behaving strangely, breathing deeply and eventually sighing happily. I thought the wine had just gone to his head. Nope; he proudly admitted later that he'd jerked off without anyone noticing, even me. FML

by god / 04/29/2014 at 2:48pm / United Kingdom (West Lothian) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend informed me that during the night, I shot up in bed and whimpered tearfully, "I don't have anything for the fancy-dress!" She also decided to share this with all our friends. I'm never going to live this down. FML

by joe rogan fucking sucks, dude / 04/27/2014 at 4:51pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I bought my niece a plush My Little Pony figure for her birthday. Only after she unwrapped it did I realize that it was meant to be a sex toy for grown men. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2014 at 1:57am / Canada / Kids